WEEKEND ROUNDUP
I still have had 15 minutes for this one:
Keanu Reeves turns 42 today.... how can he look so cute and be that old??
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Finally, a picture of Axl at the VMAs that isn't two pixels large.
I still say it was absolute sacrilege to bring him out merely to introduce the Killers. And it was worse that, being on the west coast, his wail was muted for five seconds. Fucking stupid MTV.
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Don't hate the playa, hate the game. Ice-T came to the VMAs with his wife, Coco. A pimp always takes his top ho with him to special events, you know. And she neva, eva gets outta pocket, just outta top-age. Seriously, that is like, the biggest areola in the world. No rly, like, SRSLY.
It's unfortunate, though, that she thinks she has to darken up her skin to keep Ice, who is a light skinneddeded brotha and looks slightly albino-ish next to his orange wife.
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Here's something you never thought you'd see K-Fizzle doing, and I don't mean talkin to a cop. Bitch is workin!!
The Federleezy happened to be on a quick break from shooting his episode of CSI. Let's hope his acting here is better than it was on the VMAs.
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Wanna see what I dream of doing to Jessica Simpson?
Actually, Jess was demonstrating to Matt Lauer how she got the "bruise" on her vocal cords: Knoxville grabbed her by the throat and shoved his cawk into that always open piehole of hers, thus injuring her delicate esophageal muscles. J. Slow appeared on the Today show, SINGING, which she shouldn't do because a) she sucks; b) she can't sing; c) it's against doctor's orders.
I love the way one reader of TheSuperficial.com characterized her outfit as "Barbara Bush on top, Pamela Anderson on bottom." She hit the nail on the head with that description. That jealous bitch fag stylist of hers needs to be fired, ASAP.
You know that saying, "pray for surf"? Here, Jess prays for cawk.
Check out that horrid makeup line, ladies. Bitch needs to get to Sephora immediately and dust on some Bare Escentuals.
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This is just WRONG. D-Listed reports:
Mos Def found himself sleeping in jail last night after he gave a surprise performance outside the MTV VMAs. The impromptu performance got him in trouble with the coppers, because he didn't have permission.
The rapper, born Dante Smith, was charged with disorderly conduct after attempting to perform on a flatbed truck for a crowd outside of the event.
Police ordered the rapper to end his impromptu performance of "Katrina Clap," a freestyle criticizing the Bush administration's response to the Hurricane Katrina disaster.
The request to halt the performance was not immediately relayed to Mos Def. According to reports, members of the rapper's entourage were arrested as well.
Representatives for Mos Def said the rapper was unjustly arrested and that the whole situation was captured on camera.
Mos Def was released this morning (Sept. 1).
And yet Fergie wasn't arrested for that WHORErid performance of London Bridge on the red carpet because she allegedly had permission. That's fucking WHOREndous, I tell you.
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That's enough for me tonight. Catch you on the rebound. Peez owt!
Keanu Reeves turns 42 today.... how can he look so cute and be that old??
------
Finally, a picture of Axl at the VMAs that isn't two pixels large.
I still say it was absolute sacrilege to bring him out merely to introduce the Killers. And it was worse that, being on the west coast, his wail was muted for five seconds. Fucking stupid MTV.
------
Don't hate the playa, hate the game. Ice-T came to the VMAs with his wife, Coco. A pimp always takes his top ho with him to special events, you know. And she neva, eva gets outta pocket, just outta top-age. Seriously, that is like, the biggest areola in the world. No rly, like, SRSLY.
It's unfortunate, though, that she thinks she has to darken up her skin to keep Ice, who is a light skinneddeded brotha and looks slightly albino-ish next to his orange wife.
------
Here's something you never thought you'd see K-Fizzle doing, and I don't mean talkin to a cop. Bitch is workin!!
The Federleezy happened to be on a quick break from shooting his episode of CSI. Let's hope his acting here is better than it was on the VMAs.
------
Wanna see what I dream of doing to Jessica Simpson?
Actually, Jess was demonstrating to Matt Lauer how she got the "bruise" on her vocal cords: Knoxville grabbed her by the throat and shoved his cawk into that always open piehole of hers, thus injuring her delicate esophageal muscles. J. Slow appeared on the Today show, SINGING, which she shouldn't do because a) she sucks; b) she can't sing; c) it's against doctor's orders.
I love the way one reader of TheSuperficial.com characterized her outfit as "Barbara Bush on top, Pamela Anderson on bottom." She hit the nail on the head with that description. That jealous bitch fag stylist of hers needs to be fired, ASAP.
You know that saying, "pray for surf"? Here, Jess prays for cawk.
Check out that horrid makeup line, ladies. Bitch needs to get to Sephora immediately and dust on some Bare Escentuals.
------
This is just WRONG. D-Listed reports:
Mos Def found himself sleeping in jail last night after he gave a surprise performance outside the MTV VMAs. The impromptu performance got him in trouble with the coppers, because he didn't have permission.
The rapper, born Dante Smith, was charged with disorderly conduct after attempting to perform on a flatbed truck for a crowd outside of the event.
Police ordered the rapper to end his impromptu performance of "Katrina Clap," a freestyle criticizing the Bush administration's response to the Hurricane Katrina disaster.
The request to halt the performance was not immediately relayed to Mos Def. According to reports, members of the rapper's entourage were arrested as well.
Representatives for Mos Def said the rapper was unjustly arrested and that the whole situation was captured on camera.
Mos Def was released this morning (Sept. 1).
And yet Fergie wasn't arrested for that WHORErid performance of London Bridge on the red carpet because she allegedly had permission. That's fucking WHOREndous, I tell you.
------
That's enough for me tonight. Catch you on the rebound. Peez owt!