[fan fic] hymn to the tune of a dirge
Title: hymn to the tune of a dirge: Act Three
Characters/Parings: Canada, America, Korea, Ukraine, and Poland. Poland/Ukraine and Canada/Ukraine do appear.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Violence, blood, depressing ending, and a penis joke.
Summary: Hetalia, meet Doctor Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.
Note: Act One | Act Two
Transcript taken from Channel 7 News, March 18, 2010
KENT: And now on a lighter note: The local Caring Hands charity has been a constant presence in the city, offering the homeless a warm meal and bed, all run on the generosity of donations. And now, it seems, that the local superhero, Poland, is joining in the crusade to end homelessness. Here's my co-anchor Bonny Brockman with the rest of the story.
BROCKMAN: Thank you, Clyde. Today Poland astounded the city in a press conference, announcing his intent to go from fighting supervillains such as the infamous Team Soviet to fighting social troubles like homelessness and illiteracy.
(POLAND PRESS CONFERENCE CLIP)
POLAND: As of today, I'm gonna be, y'know, doing stuff to save kittens from dying and helping the homeless of the city. And it's all 'cause of my sweetie, Ukraine. Give 'em a wave, Ukraine!
That's right, she's totally gotten me into doin' good works n'stuff.
(END CLIP)
BROCKMAN: Out on the streets is our correspondent, Cheryl Blossom. Tell us, Cheryl, how is the public taking this news.
(FEED OF CHERYL BLOSSOM)
BLOSSOM: Thank you, Bonny. If the public opinion is to be believed, Poland's move towards humanitarian efforts alongside his heroics is considered a long overdue move. I have been interviewing people on the announcement all day, here are some of things that have been said.
(INTERVIEW FOOTAGE)
UNKNOWN MAN: Well, it's really about time.
GROUPIE 1: Well, he says that it's all thanks to his girlfriend, but I don't like that girl at all.
GROUPIE 2: They say she works for the homeless and doesn't eat meat. Of course we have a problem with her!
UNKNOWN WOMAN: Well, as long as we're still safe from the likes of Russia and Belarus, I think Poland can do whatever the heck he wants.
(FEED OF CHERYL BLOSSOM)
BLOSSOM: People have also discussed the effects of Poland's new involvement in fighting social problems, which has spurred a new wave of volunteers to help Caring Hands to open their new shelter. Back to you, Bonny.
BROCKMAN: Thank you, Cheryl, for that story.
KENT: It's a good day to be homeless.
BROCKMAN: [laugh] It certainly it.
And now: Your favourite heroes and villains. Which of them are gay?
Poland turned off the television and grinned. It never got old, watching himself on the news and seeing people fawn all over him. And he could be proud of himself. His publicist had advised him to show more compassion for people, and what was more compassionate than crediting his girlfriend for his recent actions on television? She was shy and probably wouldn't have taken the limelight unless someone gave it to her, after all. The whole “helping the homeless” thing certainly couldn't hurt.
He then turned his attention to the speech his publicist had written for him. It was copied down on little cue cards, and he had to go through it at least once so his speech would sound natural. Or, at least, as natural as he could sound without using his constant slang.
But Poland's mind danced back to Ukraine, who'd been a total sweetie to him the previous few days. And, despite all the odds, she'd been a good lay. Really good. Perhaps what they said about maternal women was true, he pondered. In which case, he'd have to find some actual mothers and see if they were as fantastic as he assumed. Either way, it was a pretty nice set-up, and maybe he'd be able to sleep with Ukraine a second time if he kept this up.
----
Ukraine sat on her washing machine, two frozen yogurts sitting beside her. Really, things were going perfectly for her. The homeless shelter would be opened soon enough, and she had a Poland to thank for it. And, to be completely honest, being the girlfriend of a hero definitely had its perks when she wasn't being put on the spot in media events.
In the end, Poland was pretty okay. His weird habits were pleasantly quirky in their own way, and his rather boisterous nature could be rather fun. Ukraine sighed. Poland was something she wasn't able to define, and uncertain if she actually liked it or was just thrilled by the novelty.
She heard the door open and turned to see who it was, only to be disappointed. She wondered, briefly, whether Canada had been frightened off by Poland.
----
Canada was fretting, pacing in his lab and glancing every so often at the whiteboard he'd placed opposite his experiments. The calculations seemed right, but he wondered if he really needed phlebotinum to fuel his improved ray gun. He could simply split the remaining phlebotinum down the middle and hope he did what he needed to quickly. That would give his death ray enough shots to scare people and do away with Poland.
He went back to his whiteboard, determining how long his freeze ray would last with the phlebotinum halved. America softly murmured, “They say there are no happy endings out there.” Damn, there would not be enough time to make an effect and kill Poland if he left only half.
“At least, that's true for me,” Canada added, wiping out the equation. He tried again with three-quarters.
“Stop pretending,” America scolded himself. Three-quarters wasn't working either. He decided on three-fifths. Maybe that would be his happy medium. “All I've gotta do is take a chance and build a brand new day.”
----
“And in a few minutes,” the mayor said, “we will unveil a statue of Poland in his honour. Your hero, ladies and gentlemen.” He took a step away from the podium while the small audience applauded enthusiastically. Poland stood up from his seat next to Ukraine and took the stand, aiming the microphone up just the slightest bit.
He read the first cue card confidently. “I hate the homeless.” There was a brief pause as he went to the next card. “...ness problem that plagues our city. Everyone should have the basic--” he tossed the cards aside with a scoff. “Y'know, I don't need tiny cue cards.” The audience looked up at him expectantly. Poland revelled in the moment, just a little. Let's see America get an audience like this! he thought.
“So, when I totally fell into love with my for-serious girlfriend, Ukraine - give them a wave, Ukraine!” The audience clapped polite for the girlfriend of their hero, but quickly fell silent. Ukraine blushed dark red and looked down at her hands.
“Isn't she the cutest ever? Not my usual kind of girlfriend, but I guess what they, like, say about maternal chicks is true.” People nodded in agreement, but Ukraine's expression became one of confusion. “Anyways, she turned me onto this homeless thingy, which is, y'know, bad. And so I realise that, like, I'm not the only good guy here. I'm not the only dude fighting.” He grinned at the applause, followed by an expectant silence.
“So, I know you're wondering what your part is, since you're totally homeless and, like, depressed. But home's where the heart is, so your real home's in your chest! And everyone's got, y'know, a villain they gotta face. They're not as cool as mine,” he added, “but it's fine to know your place.” The smiles in the audience were wide. “I mean, everyone's a hero in their own way, I guess. It's totally not that heroic, though.
“I gotta thank my gee-eff, she was totally awesome in bed, for showing me how to use all my muscles in a new way, if you know what I mean.” Poland didn't notice Ukraine leave her spot on the stage silently. “I learned it ain't enough to bash in heads, you gotta bash in the minds, too! So, I'll be poverty's new sheriff, and I'll make those slums fabulous, 'cause a hero doesn't care if you're a buncha scary bums. But you gotta remember, everybody's a hero in their own less coolio way. Even if it's kinda hard, if you aren't a friggin' 'tard you'll totes get it. Even if, 'kay, like, you're an unfabulous person, you can be a--”
America emerged from under the tarp covering the statue of Poland and shot at him with his freeze ray. The beam hit him and Poland was stuck mid-dodge, a look of open-mouthed surprise on his face. America laughed darkly as the audience turned to face him, smirking as he jumped off the statue and walked down the aisle. Because he'd supplemented the freeze ray's power by plugging it into a wall, the lights above immediately went out and the emergency ones came on to replace them. Suddenly the room was dim, the spotlight that had been focused on Poland completely out. The brightest light in the room was the bright blue ray coming from the freeze ray and hitting Poland.
“Look at these people,” America pondered as he walked slowly, “it's amazing how easy it is to get sheep lined up for the slaughter, isn't it? No one's condemned them, they're just lining up, like lemmings.”
“Why can't they see it, though? They know what they're hearing is just lies.” Canada asked softly, staring directly into the eyes of one of the homeless men in attendance.
“Maybe the fee's too pricey for them to realise. But your disguise,” he said, going up the stairs leading to the stage, “is slipping.” He said the final two words very softly, almost into Poland's ear, but everyone could hear him speak.
Canada laughed once, humourless. “Now that he's still as the grave you're frightened. But you're like cavemen fearing thunder, you don't hear me.”
America walked back down the stairs and looked at a group of Poland's fans. “I bring you pain,” he told them softly, taking the face of one of the girls in his hand and forcing her to look at him. “The kind you can't suffer quietly.” She whimpered when she met his eyes, but all America saw was how she had cut her hair to match Poland's. Such a shame. He let the girl be.
“Maybe that'll wake you up and remind you, inside you're rioting.” He was at the back of the room again, and he did a spin that was nearly whimsical, pulling his new death ray from under his labcoat. He fired once at the ceiling, the sound loud in the silent room. Now people were screaming, many of them trying to get out of their chairs and run away.
“Go ahead, run away, say it was horrible,” Canada urged. “Tell your friends, tell the press! Get a pic,” he told a photographer, “do a blog,” he advised with an wry smile.
The few remaining people were dead silent as Canada approached Poland and levelled the death ray at him. “There's no sign of Ukraine. Good, I don't want her to see this. It's going to be bloody.
“Keep your head up, Canada. You can do it,” he prompted himself. “Here goes no mercy...” Canada paused, drawing the courage to pull the trigger and end Poland's life. He hesitated, and heard the freeze ray powering down, having used its phlebotinum fuel up and programmed to cut off the electricity from the wall socket when that happened. The normal lights came up, as did the spotlight, illuminating the room again.
“That's not a good sound,” Canada said, turning to the freeze ray. He turned back to Poland and was immediately punched in the face. He fell and slid halfway down the aisle, the death ray bouncing as it hit the ground, as people sighed with relief. The madman was under control.
Poland approached Canada, scooping up the sparking and hissing weapon as he went, pushed the villain back to the ground with his foot, and finished his own speech. “--be a hero, too, so 'kay thanks, bye.” There was a brief pause as Poland read the label of the gun he was holding. “A death ray? Someone's finally movin' up! I wonder if this works better than your other fail stuff.” He pointed the weapon at Canada.
“Don't...” he gasped, lying helplessly under Poland's foot. The death ray could do anything at this point, damaged as it was.
“Jus' shut up and take it like a man!” Poland hissed back. He pulled the trigger. The death ray exploded.
The wave of energy the unused phlebotinum released tossed Poland back onto the stage, where he landed with the horrible noise of his shoulder being disconnected and a scream of pain. “Shiiiiiiiiit!” he screeched, clutching his shoulder tightly. Canada stood, amazingly unscathed except for a light singeing of one of his eyebrows. Coughing, he dusted himself off. Poland had barrelled out the room, unable to take the first bit of true pain he'd experienced in his life.
Quickly, Canada took stock of what had happened. The phlebotinum had exploded, shattering the death ray and embedding the pieces of shrapnel deep into the wall. The people still in the room were cowering, hiding further behind chairs when they thought he was looking at them. He felt joy ride within him, finally respected as a villain, his nemesis just defeated.
The beginnings of his smile died when he saw Ukraine.
He knelt by her side, gasping her name feebly. He tried to do something with his hands, eyes searching for a sign that what had happened would be easy to fix. But her shrapnel wounds were very much real, and Canada knew that she would not live long having been run through by the sharp, jagged pieces of metal. He touched her dark, thick blood with his white gloves.
“Canada? Is it you?” she asked weakly, her eyes unfocused as she tried to raise her face to meet Canada's gaze. He was looking around the room, as if the miracle that would save her was there and he just needed to find it.
“Ukraine, please hold on,” he begged. A string of noes passed his lips, one of his hands resting in her blood while the other restlessly wandered, trying to find - to remember - how to save her.
“Are you alright?” she asked gently, distressed by his distress. She still wasn't looking him in the eyes, but now Canada ducked his head in order to meet her gaze, willing her to hold on while help was on its way. His restless hand found one of hers, lying limp on the ground.
“It's okay,” she whispered, a smile ghosting on her lips. “You're safe with Poland here.” He nearly cried, clutching her limp fingers so tightly it must have been painful, trying to hold her gaze even as Ukraine's head sank and her already unfocused eyes grew dark. Her chin pressed against her collarbone and Canada released her hand. A hundred thousand things tried to rush up his throat at once, choking him. You're beautiful snarled with hold on, and I actually hated laundry before you caught up with I'm sorry, and I love you entangled with I'm not safe with Poland. Only gasps and the raw syllables of everything he wanted to say escaped.
A camera flashed, blinding Canada for a minute. “America, why'd you kill her?” the reporter asked. The villain looked up, and would recall later that in the position he looked like an animal hunched over its kill. More cameras flashed too bright, too unreal, while all the questions melded into a constant background chatter. A bolt of clarity hit him. He'd just won. He trembled with the revelation, staring open-mouthed at Ukraine's limp body. It occurred to him that when people won, they sang.
“Here lies everything - the world I've wanted at my feet,” he sang tunelessly. “My victory's complete,” he knelt back down, next to Ukraine, “so hail to the king.
“Arise and sing,” he urged himself.
“Your world is benign,” Canada whispered, lifting Ukraine into his arms and walking towards the stretcher. “You think justice has a voice, that all of us can choose our lives.” He set her down on the stretcher and dared a final tender caress to her cheek through his glove. “I'll hold on to that for you,” he promised. The stretcher was wheeled away, leaving Canada alone in the room.
“I'll be fine,” he lied.
----
Korea opened the door to get the newspaper lying there, and saw the headline “America: The Worst Villain Ever”. A second header read “Hero's Girlfriend Murdered”. He turned to his TV and flipped it onto the news. The anchors were barely holding back tears as they delivered the details of the event.
Before he had time to comprehend what the report meant, the phone rang.
“Care to go on a heist?” America invited cheerfully. Korea clenched his teeth together and momentarily mourned the loss of his friend.
“I'm in.”
----
villain450
2010-06-18 5:46 am (local) (link)
first comment! XD
great job getting into the legue but what happened to the end of your video you're just sitting there.
Bad_Horse_rules!
2010-06-18 7:45 am (local) (link)
Dude, you're in the Evil League of Evil! It's kinda full circle that your last blog entry is just before your official entrance, huh? But you might want to crop out the end of your video. There's like fifteen seconds of you just sitting there.
LiechtensteinGirl
2010-06-18 11:23 am (local) (link)
Goodness, has it already been three months? Time flies, doesn't it?
But look at you, you've made it to the big leagues, just like you always wanted. I suppose now you'll have to find a new dream to chase. I always wanted to ask, though, why you decided to kill that woman. She seemed harmless enough, even kind of cute once you got past the dead. I'm guessing by the pictures in the papers from back then that it's a personal matter.
And I agree with Bad_Horse_rules!, that last fifteen seconds is highly unnerving. I was expecting a screamer.
Lady Armageddon
2010-06-18 10:52 pm (local) (link)
Hey, America. Sorry I haven't spoken in the last few months. I've been... reeling.
I'm so shocked, that you would actually rampage in a new homeless shelter and kill an innocent woman in the process. I know you've joked about being too nice, but it seemed completely out of your capacity to murder someone else, let alone a helpless woman like that. Was it because she was Poland's girlfriend or something?
These past few months you've gotten frightening, America. What happened to talk about changing the government and eliminating poverty and homelessness at its roots? Now that you're being initiated into the Evil League of Evil, it's like you're a completely different person. I'm not going to lie, I'm afraid for you. I'm afraid of you, and that's was never the case before you killed that woman.
I wonder, are you still that idealist that you were when you started this blog?
Sincerely,
Lady Armageddon
Characters/Parings: Canada, America, Korea, Ukraine, and Poland. Poland/Ukraine and Canada/Ukraine do appear.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Violence, blood, depressing ending, and a penis joke.
Summary: Hetalia, meet Doctor Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.
Note: Act One | Act Two
Transcript taken from Channel 7 News, March 18, 2010
KENT: And now on a lighter note: The local Caring Hands charity has been a constant presence in the city, offering the homeless a warm meal and bed, all run on the generosity of donations. And now, it seems, that the local superhero, Poland, is joining in the crusade to end homelessness. Here's my co-anchor Bonny Brockman with the rest of the story.
BROCKMAN: Thank you, Clyde. Today Poland astounded the city in a press conference, announcing his intent to go from fighting supervillains such as the infamous Team Soviet to fighting social troubles like homelessness and illiteracy.
(POLAND PRESS CONFERENCE CLIP)
POLAND: As of today, I'm gonna be, y'know, doing stuff to save kittens from dying and helping the homeless of the city. And it's all 'cause of my sweetie, Ukraine. Give 'em a wave, Ukraine!
That's right, she's totally gotten me into doin' good works n'stuff.
(END CLIP)
BROCKMAN: Out on the streets is our correspondent, Cheryl Blossom. Tell us, Cheryl, how is the public taking this news.
(FEED OF CHERYL BLOSSOM)
BLOSSOM: Thank you, Bonny. If the public opinion is to be believed, Poland's move towards humanitarian efforts alongside his heroics is considered a long overdue move. I have been interviewing people on the announcement all day, here are some of things that have been said.
(INTERVIEW FOOTAGE)
UNKNOWN MAN: Well, it's really about time.
GROUPIE 1: Well, he says that it's all thanks to his girlfriend, but I don't like that girl at all.
GROUPIE 2: They say she works for the homeless and doesn't eat meat. Of course we have a problem with her!
UNKNOWN WOMAN: Well, as long as we're still safe from the likes of Russia and Belarus, I think Poland can do whatever the heck he wants.
(FEED OF CHERYL BLOSSOM)
BLOSSOM: People have also discussed the effects of Poland's new involvement in fighting social problems, which has spurred a new wave of volunteers to help Caring Hands to open their new shelter. Back to you, Bonny.
BROCKMAN: Thank you, Cheryl, for that story.
KENT: It's a good day to be homeless.
BROCKMAN: [laugh] It certainly it.
And now: Your favourite heroes and villains. Which of them are gay?
Poland turned off the television and grinned. It never got old, watching himself on the news and seeing people fawn all over him. And he could be proud of himself. His publicist had advised him to show more compassion for people, and what was more compassionate than crediting his girlfriend for his recent actions on television? She was shy and probably wouldn't have taken the limelight unless someone gave it to her, after all. The whole “helping the homeless” thing certainly couldn't hurt.
He then turned his attention to the speech his publicist had written for him. It was copied down on little cue cards, and he had to go through it at least once so his speech would sound natural. Or, at least, as natural as he could sound without using his constant slang.
But Poland's mind danced back to Ukraine, who'd been a total sweetie to him the previous few days. And, despite all the odds, she'd been a good lay. Really good. Perhaps what they said about maternal women was true, he pondered. In which case, he'd have to find some actual mothers and see if they were as fantastic as he assumed. Either way, it was a pretty nice set-up, and maybe he'd be able to sleep with Ukraine a second time if he kept this up.
----
Ukraine sat on her washing machine, two frozen yogurts sitting beside her. Really, things were going perfectly for her. The homeless shelter would be opened soon enough, and she had a Poland to thank for it. And, to be completely honest, being the girlfriend of a hero definitely had its perks when she wasn't being put on the spot in media events.
In the end, Poland was pretty okay. His weird habits were pleasantly quirky in their own way, and his rather boisterous nature could be rather fun. Ukraine sighed. Poland was something she wasn't able to define, and uncertain if she actually liked it or was just thrilled by the novelty.
She heard the door open and turned to see who it was, only to be disappointed. She wondered, briefly, whether Canada had been frightened off by Poland.
----
Canada was fretting, pacing in his lab and glancing every so often at the whiteboard he'd placed opposite his experiments. The calculations seemed right, but he wondered if he really needed phlebotinum to fuel his improved ray gun. He could simply split the remaining phlebotinum down the middle and hope he did what he needed to quickly. That would give his death ray enough shots to scare people and do away with Poland.
He went back to his whiteboard, determining how long his freeze ray would last with the phlebotinum halved. America softly murmured, “They say there are no happy endings out there.” Damn, there would not be enough time to make an effect and kill Poland if he left only half.
“At least, that's true for me,” Canada added, wiping out the equation. He tried again with three-quarters.
“Stop pretending,” America scolded himself. Three-quarters wasn't working either. He decided on three-fifths. Maybe that would be his happy medium. “All I've gotta do is take a chance and build a brand new day.”
----
“And in a few minutes,” the mayor said, “we will unveil a statue of Poland in his honour. Your hero, ladies and gentlemen.” He took a step away from the podium while the small audience applauded enthusiastically. Poland stood up from his seat next to Ukraine and took the stand, aiming the microphone up just the slightest bit.
He read the first cue card confidently. “I hate the homeless.” There was a brief pause as he went to the next card. “...ness problem that plagues our city. Everyone should have the basic--” he tossed the cards aside with a scoff. “Y'know, I don't need tiny cue cards.” The audience looked up at him expectantly. Poland revelled in the moment, just a little. Let's see America get an audience like this! he thought.
“So, when I totally fell into love with my for-serious girlfriend, Ukraine - give them a wave, Ukraine!” The audience clapped polite for the girlfriend of their hero, but quickly fell silent. Ukraine blushed dark red and looked down at her hands.
“Isn't she the cutest ever? Not my usual kind of girlfriend, but I guess what they, like, say about maternal chicks is true.” People nodded in agreement, but Ukraine's expression became one of confusion. “Anyways, she turned me onto this homeless thingy, which is, y'know, bad. And so I realise that, like, I'm not the only good guy here. I'm not the only dude fighting.” He grinned at the applause, followed by an expectant silence.
“So, I know you're wondering what your part is, since you're totally homeless and, like, depressed. But home's where the heart is, so your real home's in your chest! And everyone's got, y'know, a villain they gotta face. They're not as cool as mine,” he added, “but it's fine to know your place.” The smiles in the audience were wide. “I mean, everyone's a hero in their own way, I guess. It's totally not that heroic, though.
“I gotta thank my gee-eff, she was totally awesome in bed, for showing me how to use all my muscles in a new way, if you know what I mean.” Poland didn't notice Ukraine leave her spot on the stage silently. “I learned it ain't enough to bash in heads, you gotta bash in the minds, too! So, I'll be poverty's new sheriff, and I'll make those slums fabulous, 'cause a hero doesn't care if you're a buncha scary bums. But you gotta remember, everybody's a hero in their own less coolio way. Even if it's kinda hard, if you aren't a friggin' 'tard you'll totes get it. Even if, 'kay, like, you're an unfabulous person, you can be a--”
America emerged from under the tarp covering the statue of Poland and shot at him with his freeze ray. The beam hit him and Poland was stuck mid-dodge, a look of open-mouthed surprise on his face. America laughed darkly as the audience turned to face him, smirking as he jumped off the statue and walked down the aisle. Because he'd supplemented the freeze ray's power by plugging it into a wall, the lights above immediately went out and the emergency ones came on to replace them. Suddenly the room was dim, the spotlight that had been focused on Poland completely out. The brightest light in the room was the bright blue ray coming from the freeze ray and hitting Poland.
“Look at these people,” America pondered as he walked slowly, “it's amazing how easy it is to get sheep lined up for the slaughter, isn't it? No one's condemned them, they're just lining up, like lemmings.”
“Why can't they see it, though? They know what they're hearing is just lies.” Canada asked softly, staring directly into the eyes of one of the homeless men in attendance.
“Maybe the fee's too pricey for them to realise. But your disguise,” he said, going up the stairs leading to the stage, “is slipping.” He said the final two words very softly, almost into Poland's ear, but everyone could hear him speak.
Canada laughed once, humourless. “Now that he's still as the grave you're frightened. But you're like cavemen fearing thunder, you don't hear me.”
America walked back down the stairs and looked at a group of Poland's fans. “I bring you pain,” he told them softly, taking the face of one of the girls in his hand and forcing her to look at him. “The kind you can't suffer quietly.” She whimpered when she met his eyes, but all America saw was how she had cut her hair to match Poland's. Such a shame. He let the girl be.
“Maybe that'll wake you up and remind you, inside you're rioting.” He was at the back of the room again, and he did a spin that was nearly whimsical, pulling his new death ray from under his labcoat. He fired once at the ceiling, the sound loud in the silent room. Now people were screaming, many of them trying to get out of their chairs and run away.
“Go ahead, run away, say it was horrible,” Canada urged. “Tell your friends, tell the press! Get a pic,” he told a photographer, “do a blog,” he advised with an wry smile.
The few remaining people were dead silent as Canada approached Poland and levelled the death ray at him. “There's no sign of Ukraine. Good, I don't want her to see this. It's going to be bloody.
“Keep your head up, Canada. You can do it,” he prompted himself. “Here goes no mercy...” Canada paused, drawing the courage to pull the trigger and end Poland's life. He hesitated, and heard the freeze ray powering down, having used its phlebotinum fuel up and programmed to cut off the electricity from the wall socket when that happened. The normal lights came up, as did the spotlight, illuminating the room again.
“That's not a good sound,” Canada said, turning to the freeze ray. He turned back to Poland and was immediately punched in the face. He fell and slid halfway down the aisle, the death ray bouncing as it hit the ground, as people sighed with relief. The madman was under control.
Poland approached Canada, scooping up the sparking and hissing weapon as he went, pushed the villain back to the ground with his foot, and finished his own speech. “--be a hero, too, so 'kay thanks, bye.” There was a brief pause as Poland read the label of the gun he was holding. “A death ray? Someone's finally movin' up! I wonder if this works better than your other fail stuff.” He pointed the weapon at Canada.
“Don't...” he gasped, lying helplessly under Poland's foot. The death ray could do anything at this point, damaged as it was.
“Jus' shut up and take it like a man!” Poland hissed back. He pulled the trigger. The death ray exploded.
The wave of energy the unused phlebotinum released tossed Poland back onto the stage, where he landed with the horrible noise of his shoulder being disconnected and a scream of pain. “Shiiiiiiiiit!” he screeched, clutching his shoulder tightly. Canada stood, amazingly unscathed except for a light singeing of one of his eyebrows. Coughing, he dusted himself off. Poland had barrelled out the room, unable to take the first bit of true pain he'd experienced in his life.
Quickly, Canada took stock of what had happened. The phlebotinum had exploded, shattering the death ray and embedding the pieces of shrapnel deep into the wall. The people still in the room were cowering, hiding further behind chairs when they thought he was looking at them. He felt joy ride within him, finally respected as a villain, his nemesis just defeated.
The beginnings of his smile died when he saw Ukraine.
He knelt by her side, gasping her name feebly. He tried to do something with his hands, eyes searching for a sign that what had happened would be easy to fix. But her shrapnel wounds were very much real, and Canada knew that she would not live long having been run through by the sharp, jagged pieces of metal. He touched her dark, thick blood with his white gloves.
“Canada? Is it you?” she asked weakly, her eyes unfocused as she tried to raise her face to meet Canada's gaze. He was looking around the room, as if the miracle that would save her was there and he just needed to find it.
“Ukraine, please hold on,” he begged. A string of noes passed his lips, one of his hands resting in her blood while the other restlessly wandered, trying to find - to remember - how to save her.
“Are you alright?” she asked gently, distressed by his distress. She still wasn't looking him in the eyes, but now Canada ducked his head in order to meet her gaze, willing her to hold on while help was on its way. His restless hand found one of hers, lying limp on the ground.
“It's okay,” she whispered, a smile ghosting on her lips. “You're safe with Poland here.” He nearly cried, clutching her limp fingers so tightly it must have been painful, trying to hold her gaze even as Ukraine's head sank and her already unfocused eyes grew dark. Her chin pressed against her collarbone and Canada released her hand. A hundred thousand things tried to rush up his throat at once, choking him. You're beautiful snarled with hold on, and I actually hated laundry before you caught up with I'm sorry, and I love you entangled with I'm not safe with Poland. Only gasps and the raw syllables of everything he wanted to say escaped.
A camera flashed, blinding Canada for a minute. “America, why'd you kill her?” the reporter asked. The villain looked up, and would recall later that in the position he looked like an animal hunched over its kill. More cameras flashed too bright, too unreal, while all the questions melded into a constant background chatter. A bolt of clarity hit him. He'd just won. He trembled with the revelation, staring open-mouthed at Ukraine's limp body. It occurred to him that when people won, they sang.
“Here lies everything - the world I've wanted at my feet,” he sang tunelessly. “My victory's complete,” he knelt back down, next to Ukraine, “so hail to the king.
“Arise and sing,” he urged himself.
“Your world is benign,” Canada whispered, lifting Ukraine into his arms and walking towards the stretcher. “You think justice has a voice, that all of us can choose our lives.” He set her down on the stretcher and dared a final tender caress to her cheek through his glove. “I'll hold on to that for you,” he promised. The stretcher was wheeled away, leaving Canada alone in the room.
“I'll be fine,” he lied.
----
Korea opened the door to get the newspaper lying there, and saw the headline “America: The Worst Villain Ever”. A second header read “Hero's Girlfriend Murdered”. He turned to his TV and flipped it onto the news. The anchors were barely holding back tears as they delivered the details of the event.
Before he had time to comprehend what the report meant, the phone rang.
“Care to go on a heist?” America invited cheerfully. Korea clenched his teeth together and momentarily mourned the loss of his friend.
“I'm in.”
----
villain450
2010-06-18 5:46 am (local) (link)
first comment! XD
great job getting into the legue but what happened to the end of your video you're just sitting there.
Bad_Horse_rules!
2010-06-18 7:45 am (local) (link)
Dude, you're in the Evil League of Evil! It's kinda full circle that your last blog entry is just before your official entrance, huh? But you might want to crop out the end of your video. There's like fifteen seconds of you just sitting there.
LiechtensteinGirl
2010-06-18 11:23 am (local) (link)
Goodness, has it already been three months? Time flies, doesn't it?
But look at you, you've made it to the big leagues, just like you always wanted. I suppose now you'll have to find a new dream to chase. I always wanted to ask, though, why you decided to kill that woman. She seemed harmless enough, even kind of cute once you got past the dead. I'm guessing by the pictures in the papers from back then that it's a personal matter.
And I agree with Bad_Horse_rules!, that last fifteen seconds is highly unnerving. I was expecting a screamer.
Lady Armageddon
2010-06-18 10:52 pm (local) (link)
Hey, America. Sorry I haven't spoken in the last few months. I've been... reeling.
I'm so shocked, that you would actually rampage in a new homeless shelter and kill an innocent woman in the process. I know you've joked about being too nice, but it seemed completely out of your capacity to murder someone else, let alone a helpless woman like that. Was it because she was Poland's girlfriend or something?
These past few months you've gotten frightening, America. What happened to talk about changing the government and eliminating poverty and homelessness at its roots? Now that you're being initiated into the Evil League of Evil, it's like you're a completely different person. I'm not going to lie, I'm afraid for you. I'm afraid of you, and that's was never the case before you killed that woman.
I wonder, are you still that idealist that you were when you started this blog?
Sincerely,
Lady Armageddon