(no subject)
This is what you’re dying to read. I could go on to point out which life events that had occurred that caused each reality to develop but then this would be a fucking novel. Here are the ‘parts of me’. And yes they are also the main characters that I ‘roleplay’ because I know quite a few of you will see the patterns. Like every other character that’s ever been roleplayed there are parts of those characters that are extensions of the player. Being them physical, mental, social, etc. I’ve got three rather distinct ‘personalities’ that I can take on at any time, which are all blended into the me that most know now. No, not like multiple personalities. More like separate consciousness’ or thinking processes. I’ve always been completely aware of it all but you could say my thoughts rage like hormones, and there are distinct patterns to each process of thought, and they take over what I say, feel, and do. I just don’t see anything wrong with it, even though there is. And I’m aware of it. And I can manipulate it to an extent but it mostly manipulates me. The best way to describe them in a nutshell would be ‘delusions’ (not, not the hallucinations, those were a result of one of the first of the drug cocktails Dr. Kelp put me on, and YES that’s how we got purple dishwasher ass monkies one AND two and why the quote of Freshman year was ‘Detachable Penis’) I’ve since learned to control all of this, but sometimes it still shows in moments of weakness. One of the things that was used in my therapy was roleplaying. Thus, the characters that I regularly roleplay anywhere ARE me…to an extent. They’ve been given different names in the areas where I do roleplay, but they are essentially me. Patterns patterns patterns! I didn’t give them the names, it was kinda thought up my Mrs. Dodgen as a way to help me recognize what was going on and kinda bringing me back down to earth when I started ‘raging’. It was a bit of a joke at first a bad pun on my name mix ups but it kinda worked.
Character Analysis
Aimee (or, my name pronounced correctly, “Ah-may”)
Aimee is actually the person I USED to be. Naïve. Caring. Giving. Honest. She does not see the shades of grey - it’s all black and white. It’s good, or it’s bad. It’s clean, or it’s dirty. It’s either here, or there. She loves unconditionally because she doesn’t understand it, has no idea what it’s supposed to feel like or even what it means. She’s completely selfless. Because she doesn’t understand she is easily manipulated in her desire to learn and understand. She believes in and maintains the greater good, does what she can to bring smiles to people’s faces without actually going out and getting her hands dirty (as that would be bad, it’s still hurting people). She doesn’t care to be the best any anything, and she doesn’t care to be recognized for being extraordinary in any sense of the word. She’s content to just be, and float through time on her little pink cloud 9. When I went total retard, idiotic dunce I was Aimee. This personality was destructive in a backwards kinda way because of the constantly putting others before myself.
Amy (the Americanized pronounciation of my name)
Amy is the person that I wish I hadn’t been. She’s a little rude, can be quite crude, and nothing gets in her way. Ever. She’ll do anything to be the best, reach the top, have her cake and eat it too. She owns the world and everything in it, even you. She can drink men thrice her size under the table. She can fuck all night. She’s more powerful than you, and heaven forbid you get in her way she’ll shank you. She’s not afraid of anything. She doesn’t even realize the concept exists. Her Wang > Yours. (kekeke Marlene sees what I did there) She’s always right, even when she’s wrong. She’s both irrational and logical, down to earth and completely insane, and finds amusement in things like pity, sorrow, and fear. She’ll always be unique and one of a kind and no one will ever be her equal or hold her down. Oh yea there are people that she cares about, but they are few and far between. You’ll more than likely be an ‘associate’ of hers, never her friend. She’ll trust very few but when she does she’ll go to the grave with them. In my moments of ‘genius’, I was Amy. This was the most reckless destructive version of me as it was directly destructive.
Violet Gerald
Violet was the ‘normal’ Aimee/Amy but its still not who I am today. She’s the in-between of the other two extremes. Think of her like version 3.0. She’s got the best of both worlds. Jack of All Trades, Master of None. She’s also the devil’s advocate, being able to examine the situation from all sides, analyze it, and make the best decision in the blink of an eye. She CAN see the shades of grey. She’s confident in her abilities but never arrogant. She never pushes to take charge but she’s a natural leader and everyone turns to her for advice, leadership, and stability. Because the best and the worst happened to me as I was ‘Violet Gerald’, I still use and embrace the alias today as a stage name and I have for the last 10 years. It came about from my favorite color and the very tragic death of Kurt Gerald, my first love. I wasn’t so self-destructive in this conscious because I was so neutral, I basically had no feelings at all and went off pure thought process.
And of course, I’m not going to get into the ‘real me’ because most of you know me lol. But here I am, part 4.0 or the complete encyclopedia and not just another volume in it. But I know a lot of people can remember each ‘version’ of me, and some of you only know one ‘version’ or another but not all of them, and I’m sure that we’ve got stories to tell both good and about each and every one of ‘me’. I’m sure that they still come out from time to time, but it’s not as frequent and I definitely recognize it now.
Character Analysis
Aimee (or, my name pronounced correctly, “Ah-may”)
Aimee is actually the person I USED to be. Naïve. Caring. Giving. Honest. She does not see the shades of grey - it’s all black and white. It’s good, or it’s bad. It’s clean, or it’s dirty. It’s either here, or there. She loves unconditionally because she doesn’t understand it, has no idea what it’s supposed to feel like or even what it means. She’s completely selfless. Because she doesn’t understand she is easily manipulated in her desire to learn and understand. She believes in and maintains the greater good, does what she can to bring smiles to people’s faces without actually going out and getting her hands dirty (as that would be bad, it’s still hurting people). She doesn’t care to be the best any anything, and she doesn’t care to be recognized for being extraordinary in any sense of the word. She’s content to just be, and float through time on her little pink cloud 9. When I went total retard, idiotic dunce I was Aimee. This personality was destructive in a backwards kinda way because of the constantly putting others before myself.
Amy (the Americanized pronounciation of my name)
Amy is the person that I wish I hadn’t been. She’s a little rude, can be quite crude, and nothing gets in her way. Ever. She’ll do anything to be the best, reach the top, have her cake and eat it too. She owns the world and everything in it, even you. She can drink men thrice her size under the table. She can fuck all night. She’s more powerful than you, and heaven forbid you get in her way she’ll shank you. She’s not afraid of anything. She doesn’t even realize the concept exists. Her Wang > Yours. (kekeke Marlene sees what I did there) She’s always right, even when she’s wrong. She’s both irrational and logical, down to earth and completely insane, and finds amusement in things like pity, sorrow, and fear. She’ll always be unique and one of a kind and no one will ever be her equal or hold her down. Oh yea there are people that she cares about, but they are few and far between. You’ll more than likely be an ‘associate’ of hers, never her friend. She’ll trust very few but when she does she’ll go to the grave with them. In my moments of ‘genius’, I was Amy. This was the most reckless destructive version of me as it was directly destructive.
Violet Gerald
Violet was the ‘normal’ Aimee/Amy but its still not who I am today. She’s the in-between of the other two extremes. Think of her like version 3.0. She’s got the best of both worlds. Jack of All Trades, Master of None. She’s also the devil’s advocate, being able to examine the situation from all sides, analyze it, and make the best decision in the blink of an eye. She CAN see the shades of grey. She’s confident in her abilities but never arrogant. She never pushes to take charge but she’s a natural leader and everyone turns to her for advice, leadership, and stability. Because the best and the worst happened to me as I was ‘Violet Gerald’, I still use and embrace the alias today as a stage name and I have for the last 10 years. It came about from my favorite color and the very tragic death of Kurt Gerald, my first love. I wasn’t so self-destructive in this conscious because I was so neutral, I basically had no feelings at all and went off pure thought process.
And of course, I’m not going to get into the ‘real me’ because most of you know me lol. But here I am, part 4.0 or the complete encyclopedia and not just another volume in it. But I know a lot of people can remember each ‘version’ of me, and some of you only know one ‘version’ or another but not all of them, and I’m sure that we’ve got stories to tell both good and about each and every one of ‘me’. I’m sure that they still come out from time to time, but it’s not as frequent and I definitely recognize it now.