Several things have crossed my mind this week that haven't in quite a while. It was interesting, frightening, and comforting all at once. This whole house is alone, and dependant solely on me to turn everything off, keep it clean, feed the dog and water the plants...I feel empty, and empowered. It's confusing. My car is having it's ups and downs right now, I named her finally (Pearl, after mi madre), and five seconds later I ran over a hunk of metal in the road. I hope everything is okay, though.
Does anyone know why feelings of guilt linger so long after a relationship ends? I have nothing to feel bad about, but for some reason part of me does - like I'm cheating on someone who left me, or moving on so quickly after that person dies, or something. It's disorienting. I think about it logically, and it makes sense that I get on with my life. And I am, I think. I've done a fabulous job of keeping myself busy, starting new friendships, looking at possibilities instead of hiding in my room. I don't know, some days it's not bad at all, like I'm all healed up. And other days it's still so fresh in my mind. C'est la vie. Blah.
I missed the slam last night, very sad about that. I really wanted to see some people, and hear some poetry. Wednesdays are the days I look forward to because of two things. They're my day off, and the night of the slam. I'm easy to please. I did get to see
Jabarvy for the fourth time this week, though. It was pretty damn groovy.
I'm off to get breakfast tacos and head back to work. Y'all have a lovely day, now.