life sucks but it's better this way.
it's now december and the new year is just around the corner. i've seen another year go by and with that i have learned, taught, cried and laughed. i see the world differently..with a little more wisdom. now i know to not be fooled by the world. life has slapped me across the face lots of times. every time i grow a little bit stronger. im just afraid of what is to come. what other bad things are going to happen, but i realize that; that's how it goes. there are soo many thing i wish i could change or take back. those things i believe will make me a better person. i feel like i owe that to myself now. plus, now it's really starting to hurt seeing the ones i love hurt because of me. i hope i get my head out of my ass. i hope i make something of myself. i have to do it. whatever is intended of me. i have to use my full potential. there are just so many things i think i have to change. things i still have yet to learned. soo many things and yet i could die tomorrow and wouldn't even see it coming. it almost happened once. it can happen again. i don't understand this "life" sometimes. i don't understand alot of things. i hope and with saying hope i mean will do...things better next year. i will try and be as openmined yet caucious as much as possible. i will be going back to school and i will try to be a better family member. i love my mom, my sister and my doggie like no one would ever belived. more than i ever beleived. now i owe it to them and myself. now it's time to grow up.
stefanie
stefanie