See Who I Am (mission_insane - Table #3, Prompt #5: psycho)
Title: See Who I Am
Fandom: LOST
Characters: Benjamin Linus x Annie, Richard Alpert, Jacob, mentions of Roger Linus and Emily Linus
Prompt: Table #3, Prompt #5 (psycho) // LOST Fic Battle 2010 (Annie/Ben, once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl)
Word Count: 1380
Rating: PG
Warning(s): Character spoilers, mentions of death.
Summary: Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved a boy. And the boy almost died and then she didn't love him anymore.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters.
See Who I Am
(Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved a boy.
And the boy almost died and then she didn't love him anymore.)
*
You've been acting different lately, she says. He asks her how and she says she doesn't know, but it's true. It's true.
Well, tell me to do something that I used to do. And then I'll show you I'm the same as always, he says.
Tell me a story, she pleads.
About what?
About you. Duh.
Right. Of course. Me.
*
Once upon a time, there was a boy named Ben. He lived on the only island of the world, and he lived on his own because he didn't need anyone else. His father was happily living in a house--or a home--far away, without the burden of a child. He didn't know what happened to his mother, and since he heard so little about her, he assumed she was all right wherever she was. And Ben, he was normal. Ordinary. His favorite color was blue. His favorite thing to do was read and he had to wear glasses because everything was too much of a blur without them.
And day and night, he read with those damaged eyes of his, became absorbed in stories about things that seemed too good to be true. There were things like knights who could slay monsters called dragons in order to save the one they loved. There were magicians who could manipulate the world any way they wished. But, again, this all seemed to good to be true. Still. Ben was curious. Maybe they weren't so fictional.
And so he started to search for the truth of it all as time passed. He observed everything around him and his prayer was answered. He noticed how people talked about a man named Jacob as if he were the greatest person on earth. How there was another man on the island who never aged for some reason or another. And Ben, he knew that the island was special in a way he couldn't yet explain, and now that he knew it was all real, he also wanted to be special somehow, someway.
He decided his goal in life was to become a god.
*
She interrupts him about the idea that she thinks is most likely to keep her sanity.
Why are you saying you were on the island? Why not a country like England or America or... wherever you lived before?
Because they don't exist.
Of course they do. You didn't always live on this island, right? So you should know there's other places.
The island is the only place.
But you know that's not true.
The island is the only place.
Silence.
*
Anyway, Ben first looked for the man who never aged. He asked around, discovered a man who had been around for as long as anyone could remember and who still looked like he was thirty-five. A man whose weary eyes and fit body told two completely different stories. The man's name was Richard Alpert.
And Ben confronted Richard Alpert, asked how he was so special. Asked how he was the only one. Richard looked shocked; Ben wasn't supposed to know. No one was supposed to know. But it didn't mean no one noticed, so he sighed and said Jacob made him that way. He was chosen for some reason he couldn't explain.
Of course, Ben asked to see Jacob, this man with no face and no apparent origin who was still a somebody. An everybody, even. Richard said Ben could only see Jacob if he was chosen, and before the boy could even ask, he said that he didn't know how Jacob chose the people he could see.
And Ben watched Richard walk away before he could say a word. And he imagined a man on a throne perfectly made out of gold and diamonds. He imagined guards standing away from the man because if they got too close, they might taint and destroy the world. But they bowed and vowed to protect the man despite the fact that they were not wanted there, not really. He imagined a king of sorts. A somebody. An everybody. Someone who was not him.
A god.
Jacob would turn out to be a nobody. But we're not there just yet.
*
But Ben, no one's seen Jacob before. No one.
How do you know?
That's what my mother told me.
Well, how does your mother know?
I don't know, but--
Then I've seen Jacob before.
But--
Whose story is this, anyway?
Yours.
All right, then.
*
Ben found Jacob simply by tracking him down. He found footprints that didn't belong to anyone in the village or to the enemies. He scrutinized the island and determined which areas were best to live in, and narrowed his visits from there. Eventually, he found the god in some run-down shack fit for a slave, one of their enemies. The shack had no windows; the only source of light was from a dull candle. There was no kitchen, no bed, just some chairs and a few slanted paintings on the cracked walls along with a few books lying around here and there. Ben didn't understand what anyone could accomplish in that place.
Jacob didn't question Ben's presence, didn't tell him to stay or go. He simply told Ben that god's main job was to make everyone he loved have the desire to live.
Ben knew that god couldn't love everyone. Who could love this man before him, so calloused and cold living in a house not meant to be called a home? And though he was young, he thought he knew what love itself was. So he focused on the one he knew he loved the most.
A few days later, he pulled her outside to look at something in the water. He said it was a fish he had never seen before. It was really a man who had just happened to rise to the surface to reveal his death to the world at that moment. His eyes were closed, which could have been somewhat promising if his skin wasn't so blue and lifeless from being under for so long, if it was his shining face turned upward toward her instead of his back. And more than anything in the world, she just wanted to see his eyes open or his arms move or something, anything. But nothing happened.
Ben just said that he died instead of her. It could have been her. It should have been her, but it wasn't. She cried. She cried so hard, and he didn't hold her.
A few days after that, another man had somehow gotten himself stuck in a tree. He didn't know how he got up. But he was afraid of heights and didn't know how to get down. So she offered to help him, told him to just relax and be careful and not put too much of his weight on the branch or it could--
--snap, but that's exactly what happened. And he fell to the ground, his body sprawled on the grass and his legs twisted in the wrong directions. His neck was broken, and that was the end of that.
And Ben, he walked up to her from behind and said it was her fault. She didn't choose the right words to save him, and those who kill deserve to die, too. She cried. She cried so hard, and this time, he did hold her. He wanted to see if she would hold onto him because she wanted to live, because she didn't want to end up that way, too.
She did.
*
Is that the end? she finally asks. Her voice is quiet. Scared.
Yes, I suppose it is, he says. He reaches for her hand and she tries to pull away and he ends up holding her wrist instead.
Ben, what--
Your pulse, he interrupt, smiling. It's racing.
Because I'm alive, she half-lies.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Well, that's a good thing. A very good thing.
She tries to free herself from his firm grasp, but fails.
*
(And once upon a time, there was a boy who loved a girl--to death.
And when the girl died by his hands, he couldn't stop loving her.)
Fandom: LOST
Characters: Benjamin Linus x Annie, Richard Alpert, Jacob, mentions of Roger Linus and Emily Linus
Prompt: Table #3, Prompt #5 (psycho) // LOST Fic Battle 2010 (Annie/Ben, once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl)
Word Count: 1380
Rating: PG
Warning(s): Character spoilers, mentions of death.
Summary: Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved a boy. And the boy almost died and then she didn't love him anymore.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters.
See Who I Am
(Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved a boy.
And the boy almost died and then she didn't love him anymore.)
*
You've been acting different lately, she says. He asks her how and she says she doesn't know, but it's true. It's true.
Well, tell me to do something that I used to do. And then I'll show you I'm the same as always, he says.
Tell me a story, she pleads.
About what?
About you. Duh.
Right. Of course. Me.
*
Once upon a time, there was a boy named Ben. He lived on the only island of the world, and he lived on his own because he didn't need anyone else. His father was happily living in a house--or a home--far away, without the burden of a child. He didn't know what happened to his mother, and since he heard so little about her, he assumed she was all right wherever she was. And Ben, he was normal. Ordinary. His favorite color was blue. His favorite thing to do was read and he had to wear glasses because everything was too much of a blur without them.
And day and night, he read with those damaged eyes of his, became absorbed in stories about things that seemed too good to be true. There were things like knights who could slay monsters called dragons in order to save the one they loved. There were magicians who could manipulate the world any way they wished. But, again, this all seemed to good to be true. Still. Ben was curious. Maybe they weren't so fictional.
And so he started to search for the truth of it all as time passed. He observed everything around him and his prayer was answered. He noticed how people talked about a man named Jacob as if he were the greatest person on earth. How there was another man on the island who never aged for some reason or another. And Ben, he knew that the island was special in a way he couldn't yet explain, and now that he knew it was all real, he also wanted to be special somehow, someway.
He decided his goal in life was to become a god.
*
She interrupts him about the idea that she thinks is most likely to keep her sanity.
Why are you saying you were on the island? Why not a country like England or America or... wherever you lived before?
Because they don't exist.
Of course they do. You didn't always live on this island, right? So you should know there's other places.
The island is the only place.
But you know that's not true.
The island is the only place.
Silence.
*
Anyway, Ben first looked for the man who never aged. He asked around, discovered a man who had been around for as long as anyone could remember and who still looked like he was thirty-five. A man whose weary eyes and fit body told two completely different stories. The man's name was Richard Alpert.
And Ben confronted Richard Alpert, asked how he was so special. Asked how he was the only one. Richard looked shocked; Ben wasn't supposed to know. No one was supposed to know. But it didn't mean no one noticed, so he sighed and said Jacob made him that way. He was chosen for some reason he couldn't explain.
Of course, Ben asked to see Jacob, this man with no face and no apparent origin who was still a somebody. An everybody, even. Richard said Ben could only see Jacob if he was chosen, and before the boy could even ask, he said that he didn't know how Jacob chose the people he could see.
And Ben watched Richard walk away before he could say a word. And he imagined a man on a throne perfectly made out of gold and diamonds. He imagined guards standing away from the man because if they got too close, they might taint and destroy the world. But they bowed and vowed to protect the man despite the fact that they were not wanted there, not really. He imagined a king of sorts. A somebody. An everybody. Someone who was not him.
A god.
Jacob would turn out to be a nobody. But we're not there just yet.
*
But Ben, no one's seen Jacob before. No one.
How do you know?
That's what my mother told me.
Well, how does your mother know?
I don't know, but--
Then I've seen Jacob before.
But--
Whose story is this, anyway?
Yours.
All right, then.
*
Ben found Jacob simply by tracking him down. He found footprints that didn't belong to anyone in the village or to the enemies. He scrutinized the island and determined which areas were best to live in, and narrowed his visits from there. Eventually, he found the god in some run-down shack fit for a slave, one of their enemies. The shack had no windows; the only source of light was from a dull candle. There was no kitchen, no bed, just some chairs and a few slanted paintings on the cracked walls along with a few books lying around here and there. Ben didn't understand what anyone could accomplish in that place.
Jacob didn't question Ben's presence, didn't tell him to stay or go. He simply told Ben that god's main job was to make everyone he loved have the desire to live.
Ben knew that god couldn't love everyone. Who could love this man before him, so calloused and cold living in a house not meant to be called a home? And though he was young, he thought he knew what love itself was. So he focused on the one he knew he loved the most.
A few days later, he pulled her outside to look at something in the water. He said it was a fish he had never seen before. It was really a man who had just happened to rise to the surface to reveal his death to the world at that moment. His eyes were closed, which could have been somewhat promising if his skin wasn't so blue and lifeless from being under for so long, if it was his shining face turned upward toward her instead of his back. And more than anything in the world, she just wanted to see his eyes open or his arms move or something, anything. But nothing happened.
Ben just said that he died instead of her. It could have been her. It should have been her, but it wasn't. She cried. She cried so hard, and he didn't hold her.
A few days after that, another man had somehow gotten himself stuck in a tree. He didn't know how he got up. But he was afraid of heights and didn't know how to get down. So she offered to help him, told him to just relax and be careful and not put too much of his weight on the branch or it could--
--snap, but that's exactly what happened. And he fell to the ground, his body sprawled on the grass and his legs twisted in the wrong directions. His neck was broken, and that was the end of that.
And Ben, he walked up to her from behind and said it was her fault. She didn't choose the right words to save him, and those who kill deserve to die, too. She cried. She cried so hard, and this time, he did hold her. He wanted to see if she would hold onto him because she wanted to live, because she didn't want to end up that way, too.
She did.
*
Is that the end? she finally asks. Her voice is quiet. Scared.
Yes, I suppose it is, he says. He reaches for her hand and she tries to pull away and he ends up holding her wrist instead.
Ben, what--
Your pulse, he interrupt, smiling. It's racing.
Because I'm alive, she half-lies.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Well, that's a good thing. A very good thing.
She tries to free herself from his firm grasp, but fails.
*
(And once upon a time, there was a boy who loved a girl--to death.
And when the girl died by his hands, he couldn't stop loving her.)