i ought to be killed.
seriously, what am i thinking inside?
i should be happy i have boyfriend to depend on.
and yet i actually told him i'm sorry that i was too over-dependent on him and i should probably stop being so reliant.
he said he felt disappointed, and his mood change made me feel stupid. this is when we can have a happy midnight chat, i made him feel so tired with my senseless rantings.
like, why in the world will a perfectly normal girlfriend tell her boyfriend that she's sorry to be over dependent on him?!
except for me.
he wants the bestest best for me and yet im doing this to him. tell me, if someone has to be killed, it ought to be me.
im sorry my love.
you're right. everytime something goes wrong for me, i will say sorry when i actually do not mean it but this is the best word i can say because nothing else that i say will make things better. but i really mean it when i apologise. i register that info into my brain and i become more careful with whatever that comes out from my mouth. although this is like the umpteenth time that you heard me saying this, but i really mean it.
perhaps i should just invent some filter and attach it to my brain so that anything nonsensical gets filtered out and ruminated back to my guts and comes out with my pee.
i hope u get a good night sleep, enough to replenish ur energy for tmr.
i love you way much.