(no subject)
it's been pretty long since i've written in this bad boy.
things have been...interesting. i'm graduating in two months which is super scary. i only have one more summer, and then it's into the real world i go. i'm kind of looking forward to it though, but maybe because this semester is terrible.
i'm ready for a change. i've never wanted to, but right now, i'm pretty serious about moving out of jersey. if all goes according to plan, i can get a job with urban outfitters and i'll move to philly. if not, brooklyn. this is all of course when i get a job and therefore have money. i'm just really over what my life is right now.
i feel like no matter who i'm with, i'm always in the same position. meet someone i like, they're into me, things are great, but there's someone else, or i get cheated on. much like right now, talking to this guy- i'm pretty into him, he's into me, but he's still also very much into is ex, and it sucks. i'm not saying i want to get serious, but i'm so over being like a replacement, and getting fucked over and hurt. like finding out that he doesnt even want his ex knowing about me, but i feel like it's still too soon to say anything, especially because he hasn't brought it up, but i know through mutual friends. maybe i'm being an idiot and should just walk away, but then again maybe i'm just being super paranoid, because it's not like they hang out, and i know for a fact that it is not a mutual thing. all i know is that my guard is going to be up. it just sucks because all of my past relationships have really fucked me up and i have some major trust issues.
okay, i'm done. haha does anyone even read this anyways?
things have been...interesting. i'm graduating in two months which is super scary. i only have one more summer, and then it's into the real world i go. i'm kind of looking forward to it though, but maybe because this semester is terrible.
i'm ready for a change. i've never wanted to, but right now, i'm pretty serious about moving out of jersey. if all goes according to plan, i can get a job with urban outfitters and i'll move to philly. if not, brooklyn. this is all of course when i get a job and therefore have money. i'm just really over what my life is right now.
i feel like no matter who i'm with, i'm always in the same position. meet someone i like, they're into me, things are great, but there's someone else, or i get cheated on. much like right now, talking to this guy- i'm pretty into him, he's into me, but he's still also very much into is ex, and it sucks. i'm not saying i want to get serious, but i'm so over being like a replacement, and getting fucked over and hurt. like finding out that he doesnt even want his ex knowing about me, but i feel like it's still too soon to say anything, especially because he hasn't brought it up, but i know through mutual friends. maybe i'm being an idiot and should just walk away, but then again maybe i'm just being super paranoid, because it's not like they hang out, and i know for a fact that it is not a mutual thing. all i know is that my guard is going to be up. it just sucks because all of my past relationships have really fucked me up and i have some major trust issues.
okay, i'm done. haha does anyone even read this anyways?