Extremely hexed private to self
Date: 16th March (Backdated)
What an exceptional point of confusion. I know that illegal action may be necessary in order to win this campaign. Weasley does not need to prove his innocence, and though I have been pardoned, many still look at me as though I wish to eat their children. Illegal action is a means to an end, and it is the easy path. It always has been. It's what we know.
Yet, I paused my hand at Augustus' message. I tried to convince myself that it was merely self-preservation. If I were to be associated with crime, wtih dark activity, it may not simply mean the end of the campaign but my imprisonment. But this is scarcely the time for such cowardess...It was always all or nothing. Always. What has changed? No Dark Lord to enforce our potential sacrifice? Perhaps I have become more like Severus than I realise. Perhaps it would have been simpler to stay out of this campaign all together.
No, there was a reason I started this. It was the possibility of living the rest of my life with this bloody collar. It was the chance that the public would miss Weasley's ineptitude, and I would face an even worse fate at his hands. How ironic, Weasley is the 'good' man, and yet he is likely to cause me more suffering than I him.
I told Augustus to do what was necessary. This is preserving me, my family. This is not the Dark Lord's servce, and my choices are my own.
I will achieve this.