Its been a while
Its weird I guess to be saying or thinking it but I'm really sick of being a swinger type guy. I want someone to stick with, not a friend with benefits. Its getting harder to keep high spirits when I'm the same old me with the same old insecurities without someone there to sorta hold me up. I've got some solid friends that tend to be there for me but that can only go so far. On the other hand I'm not good boyfriend material at all. I've kind of developed an outer shell that makes me seem uncaring and cold but I'm not. I'm not one to do thoughtful things like buy flowers or chocolate, and any trace of romantic intuition (that doesn't involve bedding someone) seems to have flown out the window. I could still be romantic but it would feel weird and very out of character. It also doesn't help that anything I manage to achieve I must instantly destroy. This is bogus and I have issues, its even worse that I decided to post a blog about it. Oh well, things might get better.... or not. Either way I'll survive but I'm oddly unhappy as of late.
To anyone who bothered reading that, I'm sorry to have wasted your time......
To anyone who bothered reading that, I'm sorry to have wasted your time......