CBS' s new demographic
Purely by accident, I assure you, I caught a blurb on CBS this a.m. saying "Coming up next, how to beat the fall allergy season."
I thought to myself, Self, see what this is about. You can use all the ammo you can get.
So I suffer through commercials, and sit on my hand to stop the automatic channel-changing that occurs whenever the TV is on CBS.
Bear in mind this was during the 7 a.m. hour, not the 8 a.m. hour. Those who watch the morning shows know the important difference between the two.
The "reporter" sits down with their medical specialist and begins by saying "Is the fall such a bad allergy time? I thought the spring was worse."
Hello?
The "medical specialist" says that colds and allergies appear to be the same thing--runny nose, itchy eyes, etc. I don't know about you all, but my eyes never itch from a COLD.
She said the way to tell the difference is if the symptoms last for more than a week. Right, cause colds never last longer than a week.
The medical specialist recovers from that and goes on to list the ways you can alleviate or reduce your suffering this fall. I get out my mental pen and paper.
1) Close your windows.
I shake me head a little, sure that I misheard.
2) Keep your A/C on and try to reduce your exposure to outside air.
What?
3)Wash your hands, hair, clothes, and sheets frequently.
Um...
4) Take an antihistamine.
Are they paying this woman a LOT of money? Cause I suspect the AMA is going to revoke any credentials she might've had.
That's it. That's her advice for reducing your allergy suffering, as relayed during the "news" portion of the national morning show.
As I start looking for ways to remove CBS from my remote channels, it occurs to me that they have finally figured out a way to combat their stodgy image as the geriatric network. Now all they need is a slogan that identifies their new approach. I, of course, have one ready for them:
CBS The Early Show: For people born very late yesterday.
I thought to myself, Self, see what this is about. You can use all the ammo you can get.
So I suffer through commercials, and sit on my hand to stop the automatic channel-changing that occurs whenever the TV is on CBS.
Bear in mind this was during the 7 a.m. hour, not the 8 a.m. hour. Those who watch the morning shows know the important difference between the two.
The "reporter" sits down with their medical specialist and begins by saying "Is the fall such a bad allergy time? I thought the spring was worse."
Hello?
The "medical specialist" says that colds and allergies appear to be the same thing--runny nose, itchy eyes, etc. I don't know about you all, but my eyes never itch from a COLD.
She said the way to tell the difference is if the symptoms last for more than a week. Right, cause colds never last longer than a week.
The medical specialist recovers from that and goes on to list the ways you can alleviate or reduce your suffering this fall. I get out my mental pen and paper.
1) Close your windows.
I shake me head a little, sure that I misheard.
2) Keep your A/C on and try to reduce your exposure to outside air.
What?
3)Wash your hands, hair, clothes, and sheets frequently.
Um...
4) Take an antihistamine.
Are they paying this woman a LOT of money? Cause I suspect the AMA is going to revoke any credentials she might've had.
That's it. That's her advice for reducing your allergy suffering, as relayed during the "news" portion of the national morning show.
As I start looking for ways to remove CBS from my remote channels, it occurs to me that they have finally figured out a way to combat their stodgy image as the geriatric network. Now all they need is a slogan that identifies their new approach. I, of course, have one ready for them:
CBS The Early Show: For people born very late yesterday.