re-focus

[vielslovewish]

i'm just so gotdamn emotional, still, about seattle. i got all kinds of heart complications. both expected and unexpected.
fck.

i took a day off to deal with self-care issues yesterday. inspired by joanne.

and then, unlike my usual Tuesday routine, i did NOT get up and rush off to the books. rather, i stayed in bed for a little. snuggled. then slowly tore myself from my sheets and my love to only cook breakfast for the both of us and look outside at the leaf-less trees signifying the nearing winter.

*deep breath*

i can't focus.
shit.

i have lots of reading to do before 2p.
and then more before tomorrow.

i have to, productively, get my shit together.
now is definitely not the time to be daydreaming about the left coast.
i gotta push til the end of this semester.

balance. capacity. priorities. lessons from the weekend doesn't fit so nicely into my real time life time.
and maybe it wasn't just seattle. maybe i was just waiting for something to rock my world again so i can re-eval again.
and maybe it was seattle.

lemme stop and do my thang.
i know how to do this. regiment. i know it.
ok.