(no subject)
Last night... as Brian was driving me to my grandparents in Kankakee I almost started crying. It seemed like suck a random almost display of emotion but I couldn't help getting all misty eyed and sad. It's like in Love Actually when Colin Firth and the Portuguese say "It's the best part of my day, driving you/ it's the saddest part of my day, Leaving you". I just wanted the car ride to never end... I wanted to keep going across the country. I wanted to sit in a comfortable silence and listen to good music the whole way. I wanted to fall asleep in the car and know that he's not mad at me for it. I wanted to drive way faster than he usually does to get there faster, even if we had no actual destination in mind. I wanted to stop at greasy spoons and fast food joints, eating foods that we know are going to make us regret being in a closed space with eachother after a while. I wanted to laugh over rediculous bumper stickers, and play the ABC game with billboards. I wanted to load up on junk food and water at creepy local gas stations. I wanted to stop in the middle of no where, lay across the car hood and watch the stars play. I just wanted... not to be apart from him.
We used to talk about this strange depression we would both slip into after seeing eachother, or after being seperated from eachother rather. I guess it's never going to go away. Maybe I just thought the pain would be... idk... duller after a while. It's not. It's really frustrating I guess, knowing where you want to be and who you want to be with but not being able to actually do it. Man. EVERYTIME. Just this ache inside my chest that feels like something is about to explode. I eat more I sleep more. Does anyone out there know what I'm talking about? Am I crazy? Oddly obsessed? I can't put into words how I feel but does it make sense?
And the World Series of Pop Culture just asked a question to which the answer was "Snoop Dogg" the question being who was the rapper... the song lyrics being from "Gin and Juice". Which... btw... how did I not know this competition was happening?
We used to talk about this strange depression we would both slip into after seeing eachother, or after being seperated from eachother rather. I guess it's never going to go away. Maybe I just thought the pain would be... idk... duller after a while. It's not. It's really frustrating I guess, knowing where you want to be and who you want to be with but not being able to actually do it. Man. EVERYTIME. Just this ache inside my chest that feels like something is about to explode. I eat more I sleep more. Does anyone out there know what I'm talking about? Am I crazy? Oddly obsessed? I can't put into words how I feel but does it make sense?
And the World Series of Pop Culture just asked a question to which the answer was "Snoop Dogg" the question being who was the rapper... the song lyrics being from "Gin and Juice". Which... btw... how did I not know this competition was happening?