Wankery
Tonight, I went out to meet up with a friend who was in town for the Stumptown Comic Fest. It was really nice to get to catch up. After we parted, I went to the Lovecraft Bar. I feel like a stranger tonight. I don't know anyone and no one knows me. It's strange and lonely, and at the same time, ok. I wonder sometimes, if my desires are at odds with my goals. I wish I were young again (not that I'm sooo old) and comfortable sitting in the corner with my drink until a song comes on that I want to dance to. I remember when I first moved to San Diego, I would go to Therapy at Club Ministry and stand by myself, dance by myself, leave by myself (yes, it's soooo Morrissey) and then one day, someone had seen me enough times that they felt comfortable approaching me to talk. That was when a world opened up, and I made so many lasting friendships (I miss you Dennis) and that's really something I've been missing here. At my birthday, I thought, I don't have that many friends here, but then 30+ people showed up to celebrate with me and I thought, this is great! I guess it's in my day to day life that I'm missing the comraderie that I had in New Orleans. Being able to go to a bar on any given day, and run into a friendly face. Truly, that is the one major thing I miss. (and a proper muffaletta.)