“Maybe the music hasn’t stopped playing, maybe we all just forgot what it sounded like.”
Glad to see all of you are alive and no one hates each other. Well, at least not too much.
I had this exchange Friday night that I’ve attempted to recreate for all of you. I can assure you that this conversation is 100% accurate, and definitely not a complete and utter fabrication.
Me: I love the booze… boozy boozy boozy boozeahol! Yay!
My Liver: What is this...What is this shit...What are you doing?
Me: Drinking?
My Liver: What the fuck are you doing to me?
Me: I’ve only had like five shots.
My Liver: Ouch ouch ouch this burns! It hurts! Asshole!
Me: Who are you calling an asshole? You’re a fucking organ for Christ sake!
My Liver: Yo you got some shit talking to your liver like that, you asshole.
Me: Yeah, I’ve been pretty bad to you lately, sorry about that.
My Liver: Without me you’re nothing! Try to metabolize carbohydrates or breakdown insulin without me, bitch. See what happens.
Me: Why don’t you shut the fuck up and do your job?
My Liver: You will be hearing from my lawyer in the morning.
I just started my Christmas shopping today, because as the kids say nowadays, that is how I roll. I got most all of it done in one huge session. On a related note, if you are buying me something or planning on buying me something, let me know so I make sure to get something for you as well and don’t feel like Mr. Douchey McDouchebag on Christmas. I’ll let you know as well.
I went sledding yesterday. Tucker and I invented the most homosexual sledding position ever attempted, ‘The Manpedo’. Basically, Tucker lied down face first on the sled, I lied on top of him, and we went down the steep hill next to the Palace. Please take the time to visualize this if you weren’t one of the lucky individuals who got to witness it. We aren’t gay, I promise.
I finally got Facebook to work after trying for months. Facebook me! Damn that was annoying. Excuse me while I take nine showers.
Honestly, the reason I couldn’t sign up wasn’t because of any technical error but because of my own personal idiocy. I kept signing up as ‘dtrussell@wsu.edu’ but never got a confirmation email in my inbox. I was completely baffled by this. It was then pointed out to me that my Wichita State email account is not ‘dtrussell@wsu.edu’ but instead ‘dtrussell@wichita.edu’. So my first attempt would’ve worked spectacularly if I attended Washington State University. You may now all proceed to laugh at me and set my birds on fire.
(There they go. My birds are in flames again. You can stop now please.)
Here’s a quick announcement, this Friday (the 23th) at 12:00 PM, barring any schedule conflicts you will have the opportunity to watch the 2 on 2 basketball matchup of the year…
Austin “The Slave Driver” Rankin and Dennis “The Plantation Owner” Russell
Vs.
Tucker “Gorilla Hands” Gilmore and Drew “The Muffin” Heaton
It will be at St. Francis of Assisi, which is fine, because they’ll need all the divine intervention they can get. OOOOOO burn! Come on out and support/heckle/throw things.
[Edit: If you want to come just meet at my house at 11:30. Austin says if you have any video equipment, pyrotechnics, or fog machines please bring them. Also, if you by any chance have an 'Go Austin!' or 'Go Dennis!' shirt, please go ahead and wear them.]
Square Soft just re-released Final Fantasy IV again on Game Boy, this time with the script newly translated and completely uncensored. Those fuckers. I already own two different copies of this game on two different systems!
When they released this game the first time, they left a lot censored out because Nintendo in the early 90’s were ultra parent friendly nazi’s (Blood wasn’t allowed in any game. At all. How unbelievable is that today with games like GTA?) . But a lot of the censorship was very critical to the story, and was questionable to why it was removed anyway. For instance part of the reason Kain goes ballistic is because he was secretly in love with Rosa. This wasn’t even addressed in the original. Love triangles are censorship worthy? When I was playing the re-release I was shocked at some of the very thinly veiled scathing remarks Kain makes to Cecil, but they weren’t offensive enough to warrant outright elimination (well I guess the one about her being his whore counts). Kain is bitter, vindictive, passionate and completely heartbroken. One of my favorite characters from any story and always will be.
They know I’m obsessed with this game and I would’ve bought it again, but Alan saved me from that. Thanks for the rom Alan. I guess I have an affinity for love stories with unhappy endings, but that should be evident from my writing.
Speaking of my writing…I’m stealing this rant from one of Rowand’s monologues in part 2 of my short story (which is a complete mess and probably about five months away at least). I’ll post a variation of said monologue here in hopes that either none of you remember or that by the time I actually post it it’ll have changed enough that it’s unrecognizable (one of you already knows exactly what’s coming, and is probably shaking your head at your monitor, but bear with me).
It's movies like The Notebook and Walk To Remember that have ruined our sense of love and relationships with their 'fake love'. Stories like that make us think that mind blowing, transcendent romantic relationships are a normal part of living. Everyone will measure their lives against the 'fake love'...and never be satisfied. We’re told what we’re supposed to look for and experience and we cant get that notion out of our head, and no one can meet anyone and date normally without their head getting all fucked up. We all have a subconscious standard that’s telling us to look for something deeper than we actually need. Basically, I’m blaming Nicholas Sparks for the downfall of modern romance. Coldplay is at fault too, but not nearly as much.
Then again, this could just be going along with the startling development that I’m delusional and full of shit. If you need me, I’ll be clinging to my last bit of integrity and certainty in that room over there.
I was bored and reading over old journal entries of mine, when I came across a conversation my dad and I had in June of 2003 and it made me laugh so hard I decided to post it again:
Thomas (Official Father of Dennis): “Dennis, if you remember one thing out of everything I ever teach you, remember this-”
Me: “What?”
Thomas: “All women are insane until proven otherwise.”
And lastly, after re-reading everything I’ve ever written on my LJ, I learned that I have a growing and somewhat annoying and amateurish habit of writing in short, declarative, bullet-point-like sentences.
Like this.
And this.
Shit.
I’m going to stop.
Right.
Now.
I had this exchange Friday night that I’ve attempted to recreate for all of you. I can assure you that this conversation is 100% accurate, and definitely not a complete and utter fabrication.
Me: I love the booze… boozy boozy boozy boozeahol! Yay!
My Liver: What is this...What is this shit...What are you doing?
Me: Drinking?
My Liver: What the fuck are you doing to me?
Me: I’ve only had like five shots.
My Liver: Ouch ouch ouch this burns! It hurts! Asshole!
Me: Who are you calling an asshole? You’re a fucking organ for Christ sake!
My Liver: Yo you got some shit talking to your liver like that, you asshole.
Me: Yeah, I’ve been pretty bad to you lately, sorry about that.
My Liver: Without me you’re nothing! Try to metabolize carbohydrates or breakdown insulin without me, bitch. See what happens.
Me: Why don’t you shut the fuck up and do your job?
My Liver: You will be hearing from my lawyer in the morning.
I just started my Christmas shopping today, because as the kids say nowadays, that is how I roll. I got most all of it done in one huge session. On a related note, if you are buying me something or planning on buying me something, let me know so I make sure to get something for you as well and don’t feel like Mr. Douchey McDouchebag on Christmas. I’ll let you know as well.
I went sledding yesterday. Tucker and I invented the most homosexual sledding position ever attempted, ‘The Manpedo’. Basically, Tucker lied down face first on the sled, I lied on top of him, and we went down the steep hill next to the Palace. Please take the time to visualize this if you weren’t one of the lucky individuals who got to witness it. We aren’t gay, I promise.
I finally got Facebook to work after trying for months. Facebook me! Damn that was annoying. Excuse me while I take nine showers.
Honestly, the reason I couldn’t sign up wasn’t because of any technical error but because of my own personal idiocy. I kept signing up as ‘dtrussell@wsu.edu’ but never got a confirmation email in my inbox. I was completely baffled by this. It was then pointed out to me that my Wichita State email account is not ‘dtrussell@wsu.edu’ but instead ‘dtrussell@wichita.edu’. So my first attempt would’ve worked spectacularly if I attended Washington State University. You may now all proceed to laugh at me and set my birds on fire.
(There they go. My birds are in flames again. You can stop now please.)
Here’s a quick announcement, this Friday (the 23th) at 12:00 PM, barring any schedule conflicts you will have the opportunity to watch the 2 on 2 basketball matchup of the year…
Austin “The Slave Driver” Rankin and Dennis “The Plantation Owner” Russell
Vs.
Tucker “Gorilla Hands” Gilmore and Drew “The Muffin” Heaton
It will be at St. Francis of Assisi, which is fine, because they’ll need all the divine intervention they can get. OOOOOO burn! Come on out and support/heckle/throw things.
[Edit: If you want to come just meet at my house at 11:30. Austin says if you have any video equipment, pyrotechnics, or fog machines please bring them. Also, if you by any chance have an 'Go Austin!' or 'Go Dennis!' shirt, please go ahead and wear them.]
Square Soft just re-released Final Fantasy IV again on Game Boy, this time with the script newly translated and completely uncensored. Those fuckers. I already own two different copies of this game on two different systems!
When they released this game the first time, they left a lot censored out because Nintendo in the early 90’s were ultra parent friendly nazi’s (Blood wasn’t allowed in any game. At all. How unbelievable is that today with games like GTA?) . But a lot of the censorship was very critical to the story, and was questionable to why it was removed anyway. For instance part of the reason Kain goes ballistic is because he was secretly in love with Rosa. This wasn’t even addressed in the original. Love triangles are censorship worthy? When I was playing the re-release I was shocked at some of the very thinly veiled scathing remarks Kain makes to Cecil, but they weren’t offensive enough to warrant outright elimination (well I guess the one about her being his whore counts). Kain is bitter, vindictive, passionate and completely heartbroken. One of my favorite characters from any story and always will be.
They know I’m obsessed with this game and I would’ve bought it again, but Alan saved me from that. Thanks for the rom Alan. I guess I have an affinity for love stories with unhappy endings, but that should be evident from my writing.
Speaking of my writing…I’m stealing this rant from one of Rowand’s monologues in part 2 of my short story (which is a complete mess and probably about five months away at least). I’ll post a variation of said monologue here in hopes that either none of you remember or that by the time I actually post it it’ll have changed enough that it’s unrecognizable (one of you already knows exactly what’s coming, and is probably shaking your head at your monitor, but bear with me).
It's movies like The Notebook and Walk To Remember that have ruined our sense of love and relationships with their 'fake love'. Stories like that make us think that mind blowing, transcendent romantic relationships are a normal part of living. Everyone will measure their lives against the 'fake love'...and never be satisfied. We’re told what we’re supposed to look for and experience and we cant get that notion out of our head, and no one can meet anyone and date normally without their head getting all fucked up. We all have a subconscious standard that’s telling us to look for something deeper than we actually need. Basically, I’m blaming Nicholas Sparks for the downfall of modern romance. Coldplay is at fault too, but not nearly as much.
Then again, this could just be going along with the startling development that I’m delusional and full of shit. If you need me, I’ll be clinging to my last bit of integrity and certainty in that room over there.
I was bored and reading over old journal entries of mine, when I came across a conversation my dad and I had in June of 2003 and it made me laugh so hard I decided to post it again:
Thomas (Official Father of Dennis): “Dennis, if you remember one thing out of everything I ever teach you, remember this-”
Me: “What?”
Thomas: “All women are insane until proven otherwise.”
And lastly, after re-reading everything I’ve ever written on my LJ, I learned that I have a growing and somewhat annoying and amateurish habit of writing in short, declarative, bullet-point-like sentences.
Like this.
And this.
Shit.
I’m going to stop.
Right.
Now.