(no subject)
It's been more than two months since my last post, and with all the changes going on, it feels like forever. At the same time, of course, everything also feels the same.
Whereas before I was just starting the new job, now I am one week away from finishing training, barring any disastrous meltdowns in this, my last week of evaluations. My ingrained courtesy as well as easy-going nature have served me well in making friends and impressing my coworkers with my "customer service" skills, humorous as that sounds coming from a police dispatcher. The ladies at work assure me that it's only a matter of time before I'm efficiently extricating information and briskly dismissing citizens just on this side of polite.
A lot of my friends ask me how it's going, at least the ones who aren't suddenly terrified that I will report them for something or other. Occasionally I feel like a teetotaler at a bar filled with the fellow members of my AA group. Fortunately those times are few and far between. Old friends have mostly been supportive, even though I sometimes get jealous when they do things without me. Them being Foursquare happy does not help when I'm sitting at home and they check in somewhere that I was not invited to. But alas, that's what happens when hanging out was so easy before and now my schedule is all over the place blah blah
If I pass my evals, I'll start working nights, 10pm-6am. There's no differential pay, and I would have been working the 6am-2pm except one of the night dispatchers resigned, leaving a wide gaping hole that I have to fix. I have to admit that the commitment frightens me.
I've always been afraid of commitment. Be it wanting to keep my options open, or always have an exit strategy, or just plain don't want to be tied down to something I'm not passionate about, I've always erred on the side of cautious sidestepping. I know that commitments occur normally in life, myself being very loyal to the ones I've chosen, so to think of myself as flighty is like being flogged by my own shortcomings.
Ah well, until the flogging stops or maybe some backbone grows in its place, I'll just escape through netflix and video games. B-)
Whereas before I was just starting the new job, now I am one week away from finishing training, barring any disastrous meltdowns in this, my last week of evaluations. My ingrained courtesy as well as easy-going nature have served me well in making friends and impressing my coworkers with my "customer service" skills, humorous as that sounds coming from a police dispatcher. The ladies at work assure me that it's only a matter of time before I'm efficiently extricating information and briskly dismissing citizens just on this side of polite.
A lot of my friends ask me how it's going, at least the ones who aren't suddenly terrified that I will report them for something or other. Occasionally I feel like a teetotaler at a bar filled with the fellow members of my AA group. Fortunately those times are few and far between. Old friends have mostly been supportive, even though I sometimes get jealous when they do things without me. Them being Foursquare happy does not help when I'm sitting at home and they check in somewhere that I was not invited to. But alas, that's what happens when hanging out was so easy before and now my schedule is all over the place blah blah
If I pass my evals, I'll start working nights, 10pm-6am. There's no differential pay, and I would have been working the 6am-2pm except one of the night dispatchers resigned, leaving a wide gaping hole that I have to fix. I have to admit that the commitment frightens me.
I've always been afraid of commitment. Be it wanting to keep my options open, or always have an exit strategy, or just plain don't want to be tied down to something I'm not passionate about, I've always erred on the side of cautious sidestepping. I know that commitments occur normally in life, myself being very loyal to the ones I've chosen, so to think of myself as flighty is like being flogged by my own shortcomings.
Ah well, until the flogging stops or maybe some backbone grows in its place, I'll just escape through netflix and video games. B-)