When Sarcasm Goes Horribly Awry
Early morning, Trainer household. Ali's in the kitchen, working her way through a pile of newspapers. The Globe is there, of course, and the Times (New York and London editions) and the Post. Le Monde, la Repubblica, Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung, and Asahi Shimbun make up the bulk of the stack, even with the sports pages already taken out. Normally she'd have a cup of coffee, but for now has to make do with mint tea to go with her fruit and yogurt. Not that it's going to matter soon, because there's a very worrying similarity to all the front pages today.
WOMAN ASSAULTS THE POPE, FLEES INTO CROWD
Vatican says Benedict will recover
ROME--Pope Benedict XVI was assaulted this morning at approximately 11:23 local time by a young woman apparently acting alone. The assailant jumped out of the crowd lining the streets during the Pope's drive to the Jubilee Church. Witnesses say there was no sign of aggitation in the crowd before the attack, with most reporting that the woman appeared "out of nowhere" moments before she leapt onto the bullet-proof glass shielding the Pope's car. Before guards could react, she shattered the glass and punched the Pope in the face, once, before disappearing into the crowd.
...
There was a moment of sick dread in the pit of Ali's stomach before the sound of her teacup hitting the floor forced her into action. She had to call Samus. Well, first she had to clean up the kitchen floor; then she had to call Samus and explain, again, the meaning of sarcasm.
WOMAN ASSAULTS THE POPE, FLEES INTO CROWD
Vatican says Benedict will recover
ROME--Pope Benedict XVI was assaulted this morning at approximately 11:23 local time by a young woman apparently acting alone. The assailant jumped out of the crowd lining the streets during the Pope's drive to the Jubilee Church. Witnesses say there was no sign of aggitation in the crowd before the attack, with most reporting that the woman appeared "out of nowhere" moments before she leapt onto the bullet-proof glass shielding the Pope's car. Before guards could react, she shattered the glass and punched the Pope in the face, once, before disappearing into the crowd.
...
There was a moment of sick dread in the pit of Ali's stomach before the sound of her teacup hitting the floor forced her into action. She had to call Samus. Well, first she had to clean up the kitchen floor; then she had to call Samus and explain, again, the meaning of sarcasm.