(no subject)

[viciouscycles]

geez, i haven't written in this for quite awhile. and now i only have like 10 minutes to do so. this whole week i feel like i've been aggravated with music, in a few ways. one is that everytime i've practiced sax this week i would be continually getting frustrated with my playing, tone, etc. etc., the second being that i feel like i get all these great ideas in my mind for songs but i never seem to accomplish them, and makes me feel like i'm all imagining and cant ACTUALLY do it. maybe it's because i put too much pressure on myself? i think it's also because i don't have a lot of time outside of school during the weekdays. i don't know it's a weird feeling i've been having, and i've had for other things too. just a feeling of not wanting to deal with school and the world in general. i usually read the news every morning on the BBC, but the past few days i've been dreading to read it. i hope i sort of get over this feeling..at least the music aspect, even though i'm sure i will, just hopefully sooner than later. i've started using SONAR CAKEWALK though two days ago which i was proud of myself for doing since i've neglected it for over a year. i recorded half of a song i wrote for guitar and it came out pretty cool. i think that'll be the first song i want to do since it's pretty simple and nothing much else to it besides guitar and a little piano line Matt wrote. i just wanna jam out with one or two other people...ALL day. none of us have anything very specific we want to do, just mess around with everything and create something.

alright, i've written plenty enough for now. now i get to go play "Bohemian Rhasphody" for concert band. fuck yeah.