Proclamation
I have decided that we need to find a new super cool thing to obsess over. Ninjas and pirates are awesome but everyone likes them now, dumb scene kids have ruined it for everyone, fuck you myspace.com. We need to get in on the next big thing before trendy retards co-opt nerd culture once more, they are trying hard to ruin nintendo and atari now but it is too late to save them ever since Hot Topic started selling nintendo shirts. I have decided that the next cool thing will be Banditos. Banditos are cool and they wear those sweet bandoliers and shit. They get drunk and party, they wear cool ponchos and shoot the shit out of everything. When a bandito gets mad, he just pulls out his pistols and goes to town on some whitie. If that doesn't work we can always idolize Cossacks. Get back to me on this.