THIS POST IS ACTUALLY ABOUT SPN AND NOT BASEBALL.
SO I TOTALLY HAD A NIGHTMARE LAST NIGHT, AND THAT NIGHTMARE WAS ME WEARING A FUCKING YANKEES HAT.
FOLLOWED BY MY CAR FALLING TO PIECES BEFORE MY EYES, BUT THAT'S NOTHING COMPARED TO THE HAT.
WHAT.
SORRY, I HAD TO TELL YOU ABOUT MY SCARY DREAMS FIRST. ON TO SHOW THAT HASN'T BEEN SCARY IN A LONG TIME:
YOU CAN TOTALLY TELL THAT EDLUND WROTE THIS SHIT.
SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION FTW
HE IS SHOCKED! AND HORRIFIED!
OKAY, I'LL TRY TO CONTAIN MY SCREEN-CAPPY TENDENCIES.
I LIED. IS THIS SEASON'S TITLE CARD GLASS OR ICE?
I KNOW HE'S DREAMING, BUT WHERE THE FUCK IS CAS'S HANDPRINT? D: D: D:
UHHHH. GRATUITOUS.
DEAN DOESN'T DO MOTELS ANYMORE?
LOL, MISHA'S NAME IS ALL UP ON JARED'S BACK.
LAKESIDE DEAN.
I'M SORRY, GUYS. LOTS OF MUSCLES DON'T DO IT FOR ME. AT ALL. I LIKE 'EM LANKIER. I LIKE HIS HAIR A LOT THOUGH.
I'M SORRY... WHO IS SHE? ON BOTH ACCOUNTS - WHO IS THIS CHICK AND WTF IS SHE DOING WITH SAM, AND WHO IS THE ACTRESS? WAS SHE ON DEXTER OR SOMETHING? SHE REMINDS ME OF TRINITY'S DAUGHTER, EXCEPT I DON'T THINK THAT'S HER.
MMM, YEAH. SAM WORKING OUT? NOT SO MUCH INTO THAT. SAM JUST STANDING THERE? UNF.
I STARTED LIKING THIS COP HERE. "YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT."
I STARTED LIKING HIM MORE HERE. OR LESS, I DUNNO.
YUP, TOTALLY AN EDLUND EP.
DEAN'S PARENTING SKILLS AT WORK: "I KNOW YOU'RE LYING, BECAUSE I LIE PROFESSIONALLY." THIS? THIS IS WHY I AM AN UNABASHED DEAN-GIRL. ASSHOLES.
SAM'S HAIR LOOKS SO SOFT. I MISS THE MASSIVE 'BURNS, THOUGH.
DIMPLE.
LOL, BOYS AND THEIR TOYS.
LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT IT. IT'S HEADLIGHTS CONFIRM THAT IT'S THE IMPALA'S EVIL TWIN OR SOMETHING, FUCK. ALSO, LOL, BOYS AND THEIR SYNCHRONIZED DOOR CLOSING AND SHIFTING AWKWARDLY IN THEIR BAD SUITS.
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. WHAT THE FUCK. SAM, DOOR KICKING IS DEAN'S THING.
DEAN IS OFFENDED THAT YOU'RE STEALING HIS MOVES, SAM.
EDLUND.
OH, SAM. CALLING CAS WAS THE "FIRST, SECOND, AND THIRD THING I DID." DEAN KNOWS BETTER.
LOL, PRAYING TO THE "FEATHERY ASS" IS WITH A DEFINITE SMIRK, CUZ DEAN KNOWS EXACTLY HOW FEATHERY CAS'S ASS IS.
"HELLO."
"HELLO?"
"HELLO."
"HELLO."
DEAN DOES NOT LIKE IT WHEN HIS S.O. AND HIS BRO ARE BEING SNIPPY WITH EACH OTHER.
"DEAN CALLS ONCE AND NOW IT'S HELLO."
"YOU LIKE HIM BETTER OR SOMETHING?" XDDDDDDDDDDDD OH, SHIT.
DEAN IS INCREDIBLY THOUGHTFUL ABOUT CAS SAYING THAT THE TWO OF THEM SHARE A PROFOUND PROFOUND PROFOUND BOND.
PROFOUND. THIS MEANS THEIR BOND IS, BY DEFINITION, MORE PENETRATING AND DEEP, DUDES.
PENETRATING
I STILL FUCKING HATE THAT TRENCHCOAT.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL CAS WASN'T GONNA MENTION THEIR PROFOUND BOND. FANSERVICE? I FUCKING LOVE YOU. ALSO, LOL, SAM'S FACE.
DEAN, MEANWHILE, IS POINTING OUT THAT SAM WENT TO FUCKING HELL. ALSO MEANWHILE, EYEBROW.
"WHAT PART OF 'I DON'T KNOW' ESCAPES YOUR UNDERSTANDING?" DUDES, SASSITEERS, I'M SORRY, BUT SOMETIMES I THINK CAS DOESN'T LIKE SAM ALL THAT MUCH. OR AT LEAST HE DOESN'T PUT UP WITH AS MUCH SHIT FROM SAM AS HE DOES FROM DEAN BECAUSE OF THEIR PROFOUND BOND.
DEAN: "IF SAM CALLS, YOU ANSWER." LADIES AND GENTLEMEN - DEAN, WHO STILL THINKS HE CAN ORDER ANGELS AROUND.
CAS: "YOU THINK I CAME BECAUSE YOU CALLED?" DEAN: "DUHHH, YEAH?"
CAS CAN RULE MOSES OUT AS A SUSPECT, AND CAS STILL MAKES WINCHESTERS DO "O_o" FACES, AND HE STILL CRACKS ME THE FUCK UP.
AND CAS IS LOOKING LIKE A BUNNY AGAIN.
AND HE'S USING QUOTEY FINGERS INAPPROPRIATELY MULTIPLE TIMES. <33333 GUYS, THIS IS WHY I WANT ANYA AND CASTIEL TO SIT DOWN FOR A BEER.
LOL, FACE
OKAY, YES, I KNOW. SAMNDEAN. I'M ABOUT TO GET ACCUSED OF BEING A CAS GIRL, AIN'T I? LOOK AT DEAN'S FACE. THIS IS MY FACE.
HAKJSDSAKDJKSALDJKSALDJKSLAJDKLSA; TEAM FUCKING FREE WILL, BITCHES.
CASTIEL IS STILL A HORRIBLE FBI AGENT, AND DARRYL KNOWS IT. XD
LOLOL, INSTEAD OF A SAWED OFF SHOTGUN, WE GET A SAWED OFF CHARLTON HESTON DISCO STICK.
THE RETURN OF CAS'S TWO FINGERED ANGEL TRICK :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
MAN, CAS IS A DICK THESE DAYS. KNOCKING PEOPLE OUT, KIDNAPPING CHILDREN...
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, SORRY, I'M TOO BUSY THINKING ABOUT ANGELS LEAVING BRANDS ON HUMAN SOULS AND CAS'S BRAND ON DEAN.
DEAN CAN'T BELIEVE CAS IS ABOUT TO TORTURE A CHILD, AND HE INSTANTLY LOOKS TO SAM. OH, DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.
I MIGHT BE OUT OF FUCKING COMMENTARY. GOD, DEAN'S FACE.
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
JESUS FUCKING SHIT, WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING ALL AROUND HERE.
THIS LOOKS EVEN DIRTIER THAN IT REALLY WAS. UH.
CAS SMASH
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL, FACES. DEAN'S SILVER LINING, AND SAM'S ABSOLUTELY ENRAGED APPALLED.
UM.
AJSKER;JASKLDJAKLJFDSA;LKDJS;KLADJ;SLKADJSKALDJKSLAJDKSLAHFJAS;GHSAJDLSAKJDKSAL "WHO'S ON FIRST WHAT'S ON SECOND" BASEBALL, FUCK, DEAN ILU AND CAS DOESN'T KNOW WHAT BASEBALL IS WHICH DESTROYS ALL OF MY HOPES AND DREAMS NOOOOO ALTHOUGH DEAN HAD THE EXACT RIGHT RESPONSE XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD "DON'T START THAT" PLEASE IGNORE MY COMPLETE LACK OF PUNCTUATION HERE
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH CIVIL WAR BLAH "WHY?" "I NEED MYRRH." FUCK, CAS, I MISSED YOU.
And here's where I go temporarily go uncapslocky. "I expected more from my brothers." This is what we call foreshadowing, dudes.
And yeah, that foreshadowing is because of these brothers.
LOLOLOLOL CAS IS ALL "NOW I NEED YOUR BLOOD" *SNATCH*
HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE CASTIEL? C'MON.
DEAN: "DICK." SHIP THEM OR NOT, DEAN PUTS UP WITH A HELLUVA LOT OF SHIT FROM CAS.
I'M GETTING HUNGRY, SO YOU'LL FORGIVE ME IF I ZOOM THROUGH MOST OF THE REST OF THIS, RIGHT?
DUDE, FROG + RELIGIOUS THEMES = DEAD LIKE ME, NOT SPN. I AM CONFUSED ABOUT WHICH SHOW I'M WATCHING.
AGAIN WITH THE BUNNY.
BALTHAZAR CALLED HIM CAS. AND IS ALSO ENCROACHING ON GABRIEL'S STYLE. EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT A HUGE GABRIEL FANGIRL, THAT'S JUST WHAT I SEE, NNNKAY
FAKE FROG.
BALTHAZAR SHOULD HAVE BEEN PLAYED MY PETER WINGFIELD. YUP, I'M A DICK. PETER WINGFIELD SHOULD JUST BE ON THIS SHOW.
UM. "COMPLETE AND UTTER FREEDOM." CAS IS APPALLED. THIS IS SLIGHTLY INTERESTING.
AND YEAH, BALTAHZAR WINS ME OVER WITH "WAS THAT YOU?" PETER WINGFIELD CAN PLAY SOME OTHER DUDE.
BABY GRAND MAKES ME GO :DDDDDDDDDDDD
HAVE I MENTIONED BEFORE THAT I FUCKING LOVE RAPHAEL?
LOAJDKLSAJD;LKASJDKLSAJDKLAS;JDKSAL "LOOK AT MY JUNK," AND YEAH, BALTHAZAR HAS TOTALLY JUST WON ME OVER.
EXCEPT HE DOES THIS, FUCKING DICKHOLE ASSWIPE FUCKER.
And here I go without the capslock again. If Dean or Sam was in Cas's shoes and it was their brother trapped? Would totally do the same thing.
BUT HE'S TOTALLY NOT GONNA STICK AROUND TO EXPLAIN BECAUSE HE'S A DICK. XDDDDDDDDD I love him anyway.
I fucking love this moment. Ben is dressing up as wendigo for Halloween? Dude, you should have been raised in Kent.
And Dean and Sam are having problems again. Sigh. And I'm too honestly drunk to comment on them.
I'll just say this: this is how TV fucking works. TV shows need conflict, and the most poignant conflict SPN can have is if Sam and Dean have conflict with each other. Ta-da.
Do I buy this conflict, because Sam is still striking me as a pod person half the time? I dunno yet.
HOKAY, IT'S TIME FOR TACO BELL.
FOLLOWED BY MY CAR FALLING TO PIECES BEFORE MY EYES, BUT THAT'S NOTHING COMPARED TO THE HAT.
WHAT.
SORRY, I HAD TO TELL YOU ABOUT MY SCARY DREAMS FIRST. ON TO SHOW THAT HASN'T BEEN SCARY IN A LONG TIME:
YOU CAN TOTALLY TELL THAT EDLUND WROTE THIS SHIT.
SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION FTW
HE IS SHOCKED! AND HORRIFIED!
OKAY, I'LL TRY TO CONTAIN MY SCREEN-CAPPY TENDENCIES.
I LIED. IS THIS SEASON'S TITLE CARD GLASS OR ICE?
I KNOW HE'S DREAMING, BUT WHERE THE FUCK IS CAS'S HANDPRINT? D: D: D:
UHHHH. GRATUITOUS.
DEAN DOESN'T DO MOTELS ANYMORE?
LOL, MISHA'S NAME IS ALL UP ON JARED'S BACK.
LAKESIDE DEAN.
I'M SORRY, GUYS. LOTS OF MUSCLES DON'T DO IT FOR ME. AT ALL. I LIKE 'EM LANKIER. I LIKE HIS HAIR A LOT THOUGH.
I'M SORRY... WHO IS SHE? ON BOTH ACCOUNTS - WHO IS THIS CHICK AND WTF IS SHE DOING WITH SAM, AND WHO IS THE ACTRESS? WAS SHE ON DEXTER OR SOMETHING? SHE REMINDS ME OF TRINITY'S DAUGHTER, EXCEPT I DON'T THINK THAT'S HER.
MMM, YEAH. SAM WORKING OUT? NOT SO MUCH INTO THAT. SAM JUST STANDING THERE? UNF.
I STARTED LIKING THIS COP HERE. "YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT."
I STARTED LIKING HIM MORE HERE. OR LESS, I DUNNO.
YUP, TOTALLY AN EDLUND EP.
DEAN'S PARENTING SKILLS AT WORK: "I KNOW YOU'RE LYING, BECAUSE I LIE PROFESSIONALLY." THIS? THIS IS WHY I AM AN UNABASHED DEAN-GIRL. ASSHOLES.
SAM'S HAIR LOOKS SO SOFT. I MISS THE MASSIVE 'BURNS, THOUGH.
DIMPLE.
LOL, BOYS AND THEIR TOYS.
LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT IT. IT'S HEADLIGHTS CONFIRM THAT IT'S THE IMPALA'S EVIL TWIN OR SOMETHING, FUCK. ALSO, LOL, BOYS AND THEIR SYNCHRONIZED DOOR CLOSING AND SHIFTING AWKWARDLY IN THEIR BAD SUITS.
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. WHAT THE FUCK. SAM, DOOR KICKING IS DEAN'S THING.
DEAN IS OFFENDED THAT YOU'RE STEALING HIS MOVES, SAM.
EDLUND.
OH, SAM. CALLING CAS WAS THE "FIRST, SECOND, AND THIRD THING I DID." DEAN KNOWS BETTER.
LOL, PRAYING TO THE "FEATHERY ASS" IS WITH A DEFINITE SMIRK, CUZ DEAN KNOWS EXACTLY HOW FEATHERY CAS'S ASS IS.
"HELLO."
"HELLO?"
"HELLO."
"HELLO."
DEAN DOES NOT LIKE IT WHEN HIS S.O. AND HIS BRO ARE BEING SNIPPY WITH EACH OTHER.
"DEAN CALLS ONCE AND NOW IT'S HELLO."
"YOU LIKE HIM BETTER OR SOMETHING?" XDDDDDDDDDDDD OH, SHIT.
DEAN IS INCREDIBLY THOUGHTFUL ABOUT CAS SAYING THAT THE TWO OF THEM SHARE A PROFOUND PROFOUND PROFOUND BOND.
PROFOUND. THIS MEANS THEIR BOND IS, BY DEFINITION, MORE PENETRATING AND DEEP, DUDES.
PENETRATING
I STILL FUCKING HATE THAT TRENCHCOAT.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL CAS WASN'T GONNA MENTION THEIR PROFOUND BOND. FANSERVICE? I FUCKING LOVE YOU. ALSO, LOL, SAM'S FACE.
DEAN, MEANWHILE, IS POINTING OUT THAT SAM WENT TO FUCKING HELL. ALSO MEANWHILE, EYEBROW.
"WHAT PART OF 'I DON'T KNOW' ESCAPES YOUR UNDERSTANDING?" DUDES, SASSITEERS, I'M SORRY, BUT SOMETIMES I THINK CAS DOESN'T LIKE SAM ALL THAT MUCH. OR AT LEAST HE DOESN'T PUT UP WITH AS MUCH SHIT FROM SAM AS HE DOES FROM DEAN BECAUSE OF THEIR PROFOUND BOND.
DEAN: "IF SAM CALLS, YOU ANSWER." LADIES AND GENTLEMEN - DEAN, WHO STILL THINKS HE CAN ORDER ANGELS AROUND.
CAS: "YOU THINK I CAME BECAUSE YOU CALLED?" DEAN: "DUHHH, YEAH?"
CAS CAN RULE MOSES OUT AS A SUSPECT, AND CAS STILL MAKES WINCHESTERS DO "O_o" FACES, AND HE STILL CRACKS ME THE FUCK UP.
AND CAS IS LOOKING LIKE A BUNNY AGAIN.
AND HE'S USING QUOTEY FINGERS INAPPROPRIATELY MULTIPLE TIMES. <33333 GUYS, THIS IS WHY I WANT ANYA AND CASTIEL TO SIT DOWN FOR A BEER.
LOL, FACE
OKAY, YES, I KNOW. SAMNDEAN. I'M ABOUT TO GET ACCUSED OF BEING A CAS GIRL, AIN'T I? LOOK AT DEAN'S FACE. THIS IS MY FACE.
HAKJSDSAKDJKSALDJKSALDJKSLAJDKLSA; TEAM FUCKING FREE WILL, BITCHES.
CASTIEL IS STILL A HORRIBLE FBI AGENT, AND DARRYL KNOWS IT. XD
LOLOL, INSTEAD OF A SAWED OFF SHOTGUN, WE GET A SAWED OFF CHARLTON HESTON DISCO STICK.
THE RETURN OF CAS'S TWO FINGERED ANGEL TRICK :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
MAN, CAS IS A DICK THESE DAYS. KNOCKING PEOPLE OUT, KIDNAPPING CHILDREN...
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, SORRY, I'M TOO BUSY THINKING ABOUT ANGELS LEAVING BRANDS ON HUMAN SOULS AND CAS'S BRAND ON DEAN.
DEAN CAN'T BELIEVE CAS IS ABOUT TO TORTURE A CHILD, AND HE INSTANTLY LOOKS TO SAM. OH, DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.
I MIGHT BE OUT OF FUCKING COMMENTARY. GOD, DEAN'S FACE.
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
JESUS FUCKING SHIT, WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING ALL AROUND HERE.
THIS LOOKS EVEN DIRTIER THAN IT REALLY WAS. UH.
CAS SMASH
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL, FACES. DEAN'S SILVER LINING, AND SAM'S ABSOLUTELY ENRAGED APPALLED.
UM.
AJSKER;JASKLDJAKLJFDSA;LKDJS;KLADJ;SLKADJSKALDJKSLAJDKSLAHFJAS;GHSAJDLSAKJDKSAL "WHO'S ON FIRST WHAT'S ON SECOND" BASEBALL, FUCK, DEAN ILU AND CAS DOESN'T KNOW WHAT BASEBALL IS WHICH DESTROYS ALL OF MY HOPES AND DREAMS NOOOOO ALTHOUGH DEAN HAD THE EXACT RIGHT RESPONSE XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD "DON'T START THAT" PLEASE IGNORE MY COMPLETE LACK OF PUNCTUATION HERE
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH CIVIL WAR BLAH "WHY?" "I NEED MYRRH." FUCK, CAS, I MISSED YOU.
And here's where I go temporarily go uncapslocky. "I expected more from my brothers." This is what we call foreshadowing, dudes.
And yeah, that foreshadowing is because of these brothers.
LOLOLOLOL CAS IS ALL "NOW I NEED YOUR BLOOD" *SNATCH*
HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE CASTIEL? C'MON.
DEAN: "DICK." SHIP THEM OR NOT, DEAN PUTS UP WITH A HELLUVA LOT OF SHIT FROM CAS.
I'M GETTING HUNGRY, SO YOU'LL FORGIVE ME IF I ZOOM THROUGH MOST OF THE REST OF THIS, RIGHT?
DUDE, FROG + RELIGIOUS THEMES = DEAD LIKE ME, NOT SPN. I AM CONFUSED ABOUT WHICH SHOW I'M WATCHING.
AGAIN WITH THE BUNNY.
BALTHAZAR CALLED HIM CAS. AND IS ALSO ENCROACHING ON GABRIEL'S STYLE. EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT A HUGE GABRIEL FANGIRL, THAT'S JUST WHAT I SEE, NNNKAY
FAKE FROG.
BALTHAZAR SHOULD HAVE BEEN PLAYED MY PETER WINGFIELD. YUP, I'M A DICK. PETER WINGFIELD SHOULD JUST BE ON THIS SHOW.
UM. "COMPLETE AND UTTER FREEDOM." CAS IS APPALLED. THIS IS SLIGHTLY INTERESTING.
AND YEAH, BALTAHZAR WINS ME OVER WITH "WAS THAT YOU?" PETER WINGFIELD CAN PLAY SOME OTHER DUDE.
BABY GRAND MAKES ME GO :DDDDDDDDDDDD
HAVE I MENTIONED BEFORE THAT I FUCKING LOVE RAPHAEL?
LOAJDKLSAJD;LKASJDKLSAJDKLAS;JDKSAL "LOOK AT MY JUNK," AND YEAH, BALTHAZAR HAS TOTALLY JUST WON ME OVER.
EXCEPT HE DOES THIS, FUCKING DICKHOLE ASSWIPE FUCKER.
And here I go without the capslock again. If Dean or Sam was in Cas's shoes and it was their brother trapped? Would totally do the same thing.
BUT HE'S TOTALLY NOT GONNA STICK AROUND TO EXPLAIN BECAUSE HE'S A DICK. XDDDDDDDDD I love him anyway.
I fucking love this moment. Ben is dressing up as wendigo for Halloween? Dude, you should have been raised in Kent.
And Dean and Sam are having problems again. Sigh. And I'm too honestly drunk to comment on them.
I'll just say this: this is how TV fucking works. TV shows need conflict, and the most poignant conflict SPN can have is if Sam and Dean have conflict with each other. Ta-da.
Do I buy this conflict, because Sam is still striking me as a pod person half the time? I dunno yet.
HOKAY, IT'S TIME FOR TACO BELL.