Wooh.
Title: Still, I Can't Let Go
Pairing: KevSeop
Rating: PG
Genre: Fluff
Summary: “And godamn, you don’t even drink! Look at yourself, Vin! What’s happening?”
It was during Japan promotions when everybody seemed disconnected. Kevin and Soohyun were the ones who usually went off without a word, Eli and AJ seemed to distance themselves from the group as much as possible as well, while Hoon and Dongho just seemed to be there but not quite.
Then, there was Kiseop.
He sat alone at the bottom of his hotel bed with his eyes fixed on the television screen in front of him. Kiseop turned his head to the side, gazing silently at the bed beside his own. Kevin had gone drinking with Soohyun again that night; he didn’t even bother to say so. Kiseop only found out through twitter and that just insulted him more than it broke his heart.
“What kind of a roommate is this guy?” He grumbled, remembering the thought. It wasn’t long before his heart jumped at the sound of the door crashing open and the feeble Kevin drunkenly stumbling in.
“Seop-ah~”
Kiseop kept his silence, staring at the blonde man with no trace of sympathy in his eyes. His heart drummed against his chest and honestly, he just didn’t know how he was feeling or what he should do. He was upset and he couldn’t get himself to feel any way else.
Kevin made his way over to Kiseop slowly and took a seat beside him, falling almost immediately onto the other male’s shoulders. “K-Kiseop-ah~” He cooed.
Kiseop sighed, “Where are the others? It seems sort of quiet in the other rooms.”
Kevin shrugged nonchalantly, “I…dunno.” He giggled, holding onto Kiseop’s bicep.
Kiseop was full of it already. Everyone just seemed to be so lax and disunited it just didn’t feel like the old U-KISS anymore. He could sense tension within the group and even he seemed to be developing a problem with Soohyun for a reason he couldn’t pinpoint.
Kiseop burst out violently as he stood up, “What’s wrong with you?!”
Kevin looked so taken aback he couldn’t even speak. The only sound between them was the TV and Kiseop’s heavy, desperate breathing.
“W-What-“
He didn’t let Kevin finish, “Why are you letting this happen to us? You’re so damn busy with Soohyun that you don’t even know what’s going on with any of us anymore! I look up to you two as the leader of this group and you just seem to be dropping your priorities.” Kiseop concluded, “And godamn, you don’t even drink! Look at yourself, Vin! What’s happening?”
“I…” Kevin’s eyes started to well up in tears as he stared up at Kiseop’s intense returning gaze. “Kiseopie…I…”
Kiseop couldn’t hold it back any longer, he was just so mad he couldn’t help but let his tears stream down from the sides of his eyes.
“Y-You know what? Forget it. This is useless. I never joined this group to see it end like this. It’s like you don’t care, it’s like none of us care…but me!”
“Kiseopie, don’t say that… We’ve known each other for so long. Please...”
“Shut up! I don’t want to hear from you guys anymore. What are you talking about? Yeah, we’ve known each other for a while but you don’t treat me like it. I’m out. I quit! Take your damn lines, I don’t need them. If the fans didn’t complain, I still wouldn’t have any!”
Tears were raining down Kevin’s eyes as he cried out, “Stop it, Seopie! Stop saying that!” He lunged out to cling onto the other man’s arms, “Don’t do it. Please!”
Kiseop jerked his arm away as his tears trickled downwards, “You don’t know how much I loved this group. But this… it’s just too much.”
“Please!”
Kiseop ignored Kevin’s sorrowful pleas and stormed out the door, slamming it close on the way out.
Kiseop walked down the hotel hallway angrily muttering to himself. He continued to wipe his eyes with the back of his hand, trying to rid any traces of tears. “I can’t believe these--“
He stopped dead in his tracks, seeing Soohyun stride down the same hallway. Soohyun immediately took notice of Kiseop’s unfamiliar actions, “Yah,” he said drunkenly, making his way over to examine the younger male. “What’s wrong with you?” He placed a palm on the other man’s shoulder.
“I quit U-KISS.”
Kiseop’s eyes narrowed at Soohyun. He wanted to do something utterly painful to the elder male but it was against his practices. Kiseop shoved himself forward as he continued down the hall and into the elevator.
“KISEOP-AH! What are you talking about?!” Soohyun whirled around, demanding an explanation but the elevator door had already closed and gone down a floor. The elder male gripped at his hair as he sunk to the floor.
“What the fuck is happening?”
The next morning, Kiseop arrived back at his hotel room floor. The elevator slid open, revealing Dongho all dressed up.
“Hyung…”
Kiseop stepped out of the elevator, allowing it to close behind him. “Mm?”
“I heard that…you’re leaving?”
“Does that mean anything to you? No? I thought so. Now, excuse me. I have to go get my stuff.” Kiseop brushed past Dongho. The maknae caught his wrist, “Hyung, please… we can fix this.”
Kiseop sighed, not looking back at the maknae, he tugged his wrist away. “No, Dongho. We can’t.”
The youngest was devastated; he had never experienced his hyung so cold. It was unbelievably terrifying. He decided not to say anything and leave it to the hyungs.
Kiseop stopped before the door of his room. It was quiet inside, only some rustling, but still. It was quiet.He turned the knob and let himself in, finding Kevin standing in front of his luggage weakly gazing at him.
“You’re back.” He said.
“Not for long. I’m here to get my things. I just had a talk with manager hyung last night. I told him everything.”
The rims of Kevin’s eyes lined with tears once more, “Kiseop, please. I’m so sorry.” He hesitantly approached him with fear that he might just violently react again.
Kiseop didn’t budge nor did he say a word.
“Seop-ah…” Kevin gently took hold of the elder male’s hand. “Please…” He begged silently.
Kiseop looked over at Kevin and into his eyes, searching for the solution to this problem with his feelings. He couldn’t find it. He didn’t know what to say, he loved U-KISS so much that he didn’t want to leave but his ill-feelings toward what has happened over the past few weeks just wouldn’t let it go.
“Kiseop-ah…” Kevin sobbed silently; he suddenly wrapped his arms around Kiseop. “Please don’t go, please don’t leave U-KISS. We need you…” He cried onto the other male’s chest. Kevin’s knees were weakening and he was just so tired but he couldn’t let this happen.
“Kiseopie…” He whispered,
“I need you.”
It was like ice cold hands had ripped into Kiseop’s heart and tore the life out of him. He looked down at Kevin’s angelic face all red and wet with tears. His stern feelings softened and he just melted. Kiseop returned the hug and kissed at Kevin’s hair.
“For you…”
Kevin looked up, his tears glinted against the sunlight and his eyes shimmered brightly as he gazed at the other’s face. Kiseop exhaled a shaky breath as he held Kevin gently in his arms and said,
“I won’t leave…I-I need you too.”