Ayel and the Pon Farr Incident Part One
Ayel and the Pon Farr incident
Rating: T
Pairing: Ayel/Nero, Pike/Nero
Warnings: Crack
Fandom: Star Trek IX
Summary: At some point 1-2 years ago there was a prompt on the Star Trek IX Kink Meme wherein Romulans go through Pon Farr, but unlike Vulcans it causes them to go all fluffy and gooey. (Sorry, I can't find the original prompt)
I started writing this before I saw any of the bonuses from the movie, so this kind of assumes that the Narada was just wandering around in space for years. Oops.
The Narada, Ayel mused, was a great deal like space. It was large, black with small specks of light, and certainly intimidating. There was also a great deal of area with very little happening in it. Even the fiercest of the Romulan miners had long since succumbed to gossip and gambling as their primary ways to pass the time when not picking fights with Klingons.
The first five years had been the most difficult, with breakdowns in discipline and desertions. Luckily, the Narada was a mining ship, with a crew used to isolation and being forced to work together for long periods of time. Hunting down the deserters had created a sense of solidarity and now the monthly tournaments helped ease tension. Nero always won, of course. Not only was he a skilled fighter, but it was generally agreed that the Captain had never quite been all there and losing his pregnant wife had not helped. Fighting a slightly insane, blood thirsty superior was not most Romulans’ idea of fun. Romulans who did think that would be fun generally entered the military and then died after meeting said bloodthirsty superior.
The monthly tournament was not the only routine competition now occurring on board, although it was the only one whose attendance was mandatory. You couldn’t walk 10 feet without tripping over a joggers club or a sculpting group of some sort. Ayel himself was a member of the Obstacle Course Committee and the Culinary Cooks Club. What? He liked food. Nero, of course, insisted on judging all the competitions. The Captain said that they were responsible for carrying on the traditions and culture of the Romulan Empire. Ayel personally thought that most Romulans would have drawn the line at the quilting circle.
“Ayel!”
“Yes, captain?” Ayel turned from the glowing screen he had been staring at blankly for the past hour.
“It is very dark in here.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Do we have any candles?”
“Of course sir, we keep well stocked for crewmen going into pon…farr…” Ayel stared at his captain with a slowly dawning horror. Granted Nero had been more… excitable lately, but Ayel had assumed that was simply because his revenge was drawing near.
“Sir, is it that time of the decade again?”
“Just because I think it would improve morale if we hung up some flowers doesn’t mean I’m going into pon farr!” Nero exclaimed indignantly. Silence hung over the bridge as the crewmen strained their ears for gossip.
“Sir, we will be arriving at Vulcan soon. This really is not the best time.”
Nero had the decency to look chagrined “But Ay-el,” he whined, “This is- we have the best crew! They can put up flowers and destroy the Federation at the same time!” The bridge crew was beginning to look alarmed. Likely they were remembering the captain’s last pon farr, when they had landed on a sparsely inhabited planet and he had forced them all to make flower chains.
Nero was now eyeing Ayel speculatively, “Music night is going to be held soon…”
“Don’t you think we’ll be a little busy for that?” Ayel resisted the urge to rub his forehead.
“Music is the food of love!” the Captain exclaimed.
The Narada hummed loudly in the ensuing pause. Funny how you never notice how loud machines are until they are the only things making noise. “Have you been watching Earth’s historical records again?”
“…Romulans don’t have much in the way of romantic music.” Several of the surrounding crewmen nodded their heads sagely in agreement; that was, after all, why they had those records in the first place.
Nero, as he was want to do, suddenly leaped off his chair and down to Ayel. “Would you like a massage? You look a little tense,” he said hopefully.
“…I don’t think that this is the most appropriate time for that.”
“You’re right, of course. It’s almost lunch! Would you like me to make you something?” Nero asked.
Ayel repressed a shudder. There was a reason why Nero was not part of the Culinary Cooks Club, although during his own pon farr Ayel had tried to teach him to cook. Like most Romulans, the second in command quite understandably tried his best to block out the memories from his pon farrs.
“Nero, why don’t you… go decorate your quarters, and I’ll tell you when we’ve arrived at Vulcan,” Ayel desperately suggested.
“Of course! I have the most ingenious second in command!” Nero declared. Then he hugged him.
Several hours later Nero bounded onto the bridge. “We’re stopping, are we there yet?”
With some effort, Ayel was able to respond calmly, “As according to your instructions we’re dropping off Spock.”
“Are there any flowers down there? I’m almost done decorating but no one seems to know where any are. Flowers are essential to any romantic evening, you know.”
Ayel desperately tried to deflect Nero’s avid enthusiasm “It’s too cold. Ah, snow… and ice. Besides I’ve… I’ve heard that flowers are… over used. You should try something fresh, and new.”
“Like snow?”
“No! I mean… it would melt.” Seeing Nero’s thoughtful look he quickly added “And you can’t change the climate controls.”
The captain attempted a pout. Ayel was quite relieved when all it did was make Nero look surly. There was no need to add a whole new level of trauma to this experience.
Several trying questions later Neros finally wandered off, muttering something about dilithium crystals and silverware. Ayel pretended not to hear.
Finally unobstructed the second in command hurried down to the lower decks where Spock was strapped to a table. He was very careful to never touch the table or think about what it had probably been used for before the Vulcan’s capture. Over the years he had gotten a lot of practice at not thinking too much about certain things. When you’ve been stuck on a spaceship with the same people for as long as they had you learned some things just weren’t worth it.
Pausing to yell after two children who almost ran him over (didn’t their parents know that they were on their way to a battle?) Ayel leaped down to the lower deck (who said that being on the Obstacle Course Committee was good for nothing?) It was a good thing there had only been a few females on board at the time of the supernova, otherwise they would have been overrun by little Romulans.
He arrived, and paused when he heard voices. Walking around a consul the Romulan saw something that very nearly made him physically sick. Nero. Sitting on the edge of the table and “chatting” with Spock.
Ayel was just in time to hear the Captain wax poetic about his nose, of all things. Even Spock was starting to look unnerved. Wading through the murky water… Why was there water in here? Turning to Nero, Ayel voiced his question aloud.
“Caligula was probably trying to make a swimming pool again. If we get some blue dye and candles it would be very romantic, don’t you think?”
“Doesn’t anybody else on this ship realize that water conducts electricity?! Or that we have water rations? Now we’ll have to stop and pick up water!” Ayel’s rant continued, “I must have told Caligula a hundred times that we are not having swimming races on board this ship! The only reason I haven’t thrashed him yet is because he has such a good record. I don’t understand this at all; why does it seem like no one else on this ship realizes we’re going to be attacking Vulcan in an hour-” he faltered when he caught sight of his audience. Spock had deigned to raise both of his eyebrows, while Nero looked like a kicked puppy and a few crewmembers were standing around looking intrigued.
“Are you angry with me?” the Captain asked quietly, and Spock somehow managed to raise his eyebrows even higher.
“I- no I’m not angry with you. But why are you here?”
Nero brightened instantly, “I thought that he could use some company.”
“Well… he has to go now.” Ayel gestured to one of watching Romulans, “Otho, help me get him to the transporter pad.”
“You won’t hurt him, will you?”
“Nero, I understand that your… condition is affecting you, but, that’s kind of the point to all of this, remember? We’re getting back at Ambassador Spock by destroying his home planet, and then he gets to die.”
“Well, he’s being nice to me. He even said that he was sorry about my wife, and that it was an accident. I don’t want to kill him. I don’t want to kill anybody right now; I think we should go to my quarters so that I can give you a massage.”
The second in command took a deep breath and said goodbye to what little self respect he had left. “Nero, love, these next few hours are going to be very difficult, and I’m going to need you to do some things for me.”
“I would do anything for you!”
“Good, now I’m going to need you to do as I say. Go back up to the Bridge, and when we get to Vulcan, command the attack on the Federation ships. Afterwards we can go back to your quarters, alright?”
“…Promise?” Nero asked warily.
Ayel groaned, why did he have to be paranoid during his Pon Farr too?! Most Romulans during their time would have been ecstatic at such an offer.
Unbeknownst to Ayel, Nero was indeed ecstatic, however hazy memories of the pon farrs spent with his wife warned him off of premature celebration. She had enjoyed playing hard to get. Of course, Nero’s definition of playing hard to get was somewhat different from Ayel’s, who even during his own pon farr would have called it attempted homicide. The Captain always had managed to prevail, though. Sort of. Vulcans and Romulans shared at least one thing in common when it came to their pon farrs and that was that medbay visitations were often necessary afterwards.
“I… promise,” Ayel reluctantly muttered. A voice then called out “Are you sure that the Captain isn’t the only one going into pon farr?” The absent Caligula had made his appearance and the second in command gleefully took the opportunity to…enforce discipline.
Rating: T
Pairing: Ayel/Nero, Pike/Nero
Warnings: Crack
Fandom: Star Trek IX
Summary: At some point 1-2 years ago there was a prompt on the Star Trek IX Kink Meme wherein Romulans go through Pon Farr, but unlike Vulcans it causes them to go all fluffy and gooey. (Sorry, I can't find the original prompt)
I started writing this before I saw any of the bonuses from the movie, so this kind of assumes that the Narada was just wandering around in space for years. Oops.
The Narada, Ayel mused, was a great deal like space. It was large, black with small specks of light, and certainly intimidating. There was also a great deal of area with very little happening in it. Even the fiercest of the Romulan miners had long since succumbed to gossip and gambling as their primary ways to pass the time when not picking fights with Klingons.
The first five years had been the most difficult, with breakdowns in discipline and desertions. Luckily, the Narada was a mining ship, with a crew used to isolation and being forced to work together for long periods of time. Hunting down the deserters had created a sense of solidarity and now the monthly tournaments helped ease tension. Nero always won, of course. Not only was he a skilled fighter, but it was generally agreed that the Captain had never quite been all there and losing his pregnant wife had not helped. Fighting a slightly insane, blood thirsty superior was not most Romulans’ idea of fun. Romulans who did think that would be fun generally entered the military and then died after meeting said bloodthirsty superior.
The monthly tournament was not the only routine competition now occurring on board, although it was the only one whose attendance was mandatory. You couldn’t walk 10 feet without tripping over a joggers club or a sculpting group of some sort. Ayel himself was a member of the Obstacle Course Committee and the Culinary Cooks Club. What? He liked food. Nero, of course, insisted on judging all the competitions. The Captain said that they were responsible for carrying on the traditions and culture of the Romulan Empire. Ayel personally thought that most Romulans would have drawn the line at the quilting circle.
“Ayel!”
“Yes, captain?” Ayel turned from the glowing screen he had been staring at blankly for the past hour.
“It is very dark in here.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Do we have any candles?”
“Of course sir, we keep well stocked for crewmen going into pon…farr…” Ayel stared at his captain with a slowly dawning horror. Granted Nero had been more… excitable lately, but Ayel had assumed that was simply because his revenge was drawing near.
“Sir, is it that time of the decade again?”
“Just because I think it would improve morale if we hung up some flowers doesn’t mean I’m going into pon farr!” Nero exclaimed indignantly. Silence hung over the bridge as the crewmen strained their ears for gossip.
“Sir, we will be arriving at Vulcan soon. This really is not the best time.”
Nero had the decency to look chagrined “But Ay-el,” he whined, “This is- we have the best crew! They can put up flowers and destroy the Federation at the same time!” The bridge crew was beginning to look alarmed. Likely they were remembering the captain’s last pon farr, when they had landed on a sparsely inhabited planet and he had forced them all to make flower chains.
Nero was now eyeing Ayel speculatively, “Music night is going to be held soon…”
“Don’t you think we’ll be a little busy for that?” Ayel resisted the urge to rub his forehead.
“Music is the food of love!” the Captain exclaimed.
The Narada hummed loudly in the ensuing pause. Funny how you never notice how loud machines are until they are the only things making noise. “Have you been watching Earth’s historical records again?”
“…Romulans don’t have much in the way of romantic music.” Several of the surrounding crewmen nodded their heads sagely in agreement; that was, after all, why they had those records in the first place.
Nero, as he was want to do, suddenly leaped off his chair and down to Ayel. “Would you like a massage? You look a little tense,” he said hopefully.
“…I don’t think that this is the most appropriate time for that.”
“You’re right, of course. It’s almost lunch! Would you like me to make you something?” Nero asked.
Ayel repressed a shudder. There was a reason why Nero was not part of the Culinary Cooks Club, although during his own pon farr Ayel had tried to teach him to cook. Like most Romulans, the second in command quite understandably tried his best to block out the memories from his pon farrs.
“Nero, why don’t you… go decorate your quarters, and I’ll tell you when we’ve arrived at Vulcan,” Ayel desperately suggested.
“Of course! I have the most ingenious second in command!” Nero declared. Then he hugged him.
Several hours later Nero bounded onto the bridge. “We’re stopping, are we there yet?”
With some effort, Ayel was able to respond calmly, “As according to your instructions we’re dropping off Spock.”
“Are there any flowers down there? I’m almost done decorating but no one seems to know where any are. Flowers are essential to any romantic evening, you know.”
Ayel desperately tried to deflect Nero’s avid enthusiasm “It’s too cold. Ah, snow… and ice. Besides I’ve… I’ve heard that flowers are… over used. You should try something fresh, and new.”
“Like snow?”
“No! I mean… it would melt.” Seeing Nero’s thoughtful look he quickly added “And you can’t change the climate controls.”
The captain attempted a pout. Ayel was quite relieved when all it did was make Nero look surly. There was no need to add a whole new level of trauma to this experience.
Several trying questions later Neros finally wandered off, muttering something about dilithium crystals and silverware. Ayel pretended not to hear.
Finally unobstructed the second in command hurried down to the lower decks where Spock was strapped to a table. He was very careful to never touch the table or think about what it had probably been used for before the Vulcan’s capture. Over the years he had gotten a lot of practice at not thinking too much about certain things. When you’ve been stuck on a spaceship with the same people for as long as they had you learned some things just weren’t worth it.
Pausing to yell after two children who almost ran him over (didn’t their parents know that they were on their way to a battle?) Ayel leaped down to the lower deck (who said that being on the Obstacle Course Committee was good for nothing?) It was a good thing there had only been a few females on board at the time of the supernova, otherwise they would have been overrun by little Romulans.
He arrived, and paused when he heard voices. Walking around a consul the Romulan saw something that very nearly made him physically sick. Nero. Sitting on the edge of the table and “chatting” with Spock.
Ayel was just in time to hear the Captain wax poetic about his nose, of all things. Even Spock was starting to look unnerved. Wading through the murky water… Why was there water in here? Turning to Nero, Ayel voiced his question aloud.
“Caligula was probably trying to make a swimming pool again. If we get some blue dye and candles it would be very romantic, don’t you think?”
“Doesn’t anybody else on this ship realize that water conducts electricity?! Or that we have water rations? Now we’ll have to stop and pick up water!” Ayel’s rant continued, “I must have told Caligula a hundred times that we are not having swimming races on board this ship! The only reason I haven’t thrashed him yet is because he has such a good record. I don’t understand this at all; why does it seem like no one else on this ship realizes we’re going to be attacking Vulcan in an hour-” he faltered when he caught sight of his audience. Spock had deigned to raise both of his eyebrows, while Nero looked like a kicked puppy and a few crewmembers were standing around looking intrigued.
“Are you angry with me?” the Captain asked quietly, and Spock somehow managed to raise his eyebrows even higher.
“I- no I’m not angry with you. But why are you here?”
Nero brightened instantly, “I thought that he could use some company.”
“Well… he has to go now.” Ayel gestured to one of watching Romulans, “Otho, help me get him to the transporter pad.”
“You won’t hurt him, will you?”
“Nero, I understand that your… condition is affecting you, but, that’s kind of the point to all of this, remember? We’re getting back at Ambassador Spock by destroying his home planet, and then he gets to die.”
“Well, he’s being nice to me. He even said that he was sorry about my wife, and that it was an accident. I don’t want to kill him. I don’t want to kill anybody right now; I think we should go to my quarters so that I can give you a massage.”
The second in command took a deep breath and said goodbye to what little self respect he had left. “Nero, love, these next few hours are going to be very difficult, and I’m going to need you to do some things for me.”
“I would do anything for you!”
“Good, now I’m going to need you to do as I say. Go back up to the Bridge, and when we get to Vulcan, command the attack on the Federation ships. Afterwards we can go back to your quarters, alright?”
“…Promise?” Nero asked warily.
Ayel groaned, why did he have to be paranoid during his Pon Farr too?! Most Romulans during their time would have been ecstatic at such an offer.
Unbeknownst to Ayel, Nero was indeed ecstatic, however hazy memories of the pon farrs spent with his wife warned him off of premature celebration. She had enjoyed playing hard to get. Of course, Nero’s definition of playing hard to get was somewhat different from Ayel’s, who even during his own pon farr would have called it attempted homicide. The Captain always had managed to prevail, though. Sort of. Vulcans and Romulans shared at least one thing in common when it came to their pon farrs and that was that medbay visitations were often necessary afterwards.
“I… promise,” Ayel reluctantly muttered. A voice then called out “Are you sure that the Captain isn’t the only one going into pon farr?” The absent Caligula had made his appearance and the second in command gleefully took the opportunity to…enforce discipline.