Zhaneel 5/? OMG, I'M SO SORRYbondedgryphonDecember 31 2010, 00:02:56 UTC
It's amazing to her, then, that she succeeds in taking out not one of the misshapen gryphons, but all three that she moved in against. She had expected the move to lead to her death, but instead she survives and finds herself receiving praise and a prize token from Urtho himself. She is flabbergasted, not knowing what to make heads or tails of, finally going because she is told that the kestra'chern can bring her pleasure and make her feel well.
She wants nothing more than to feel acceptance and love, so the notion that she can receive this from someone, even if paying with her prize token, is acceptable to her. Amberdrake's refusal of her confused advance leads her back into a loop of self-loathing and self-deprecation. Not even he, someone that lives to heal and make gryphons lovely, sees her as anything more than ugly and misshapen. When 'Drake begins to show her that her differences are an advancement and not a hindrance, she does not believe him at first.
However, when asked if Urtho would deliberately make her anything less than perfect, her denial is absolute and instantaneous. Their Father would never create something less than perfect in his eyes, something that his children believe to the very core of their being. This point, though, had never been brought up to the heart-sick gyrfalcon before. She begins to look at her differences in a whole new way, taking a certain degree of pride in that she can fly Circuits faster and higher than any others in the Wing; even if those Circuits are just for fledglings.
Zhaneel begins to think, to hope, that there is a very deliberate reason that she looks the way she looks.
What is Zhaneel?: A desire to not only survive, but to excel. When Amberdrake reads Zhaneels emotions and finds her suicidal, he also notes in her a desire to be recognized and to make her death count for something. It's not that she wants to make an impression on those around her (though she does seek to impress the attractive Skan), but that she wishes to prove she's better than she is thought of.
No matter that she's been beaten down emotional for years, Zhaneel still has an inner fire burning within her; a will to not simply live, but to thrive. She wants to do well and prove that she can do anything and everything thrown at her. And though she does not believe herself worthy of praise when completing a task, it's her own personal victory that she did succeed. She wants to see gryphons given the respect they are do and to see them treated as the sentient and brave creatures that they are.
She sets out to make her obstacle course to prove her worth to others (and herself), that she was made different because she is special, not because she was a mistake or a cull. Though it was Amberdrake that instilled these thoughts in her originally, it is she that is ingenious enough to design the course; a course that only she is able to maneuver without injuring herself. Her self-worth begins to improve drastically, though she finds praise difficult and embarrassing to take. She is not accustomed to being recognized in any fashion, let alone by those of rank.
Zhaneel believes that the gryphons should be treated as any other participant in Urtho's forces and, as she gains her courage, takes it upon herself to voice these opinion when confronted. The lioness part of Zhaneel is made apparent and she fights for her beliefs, showing a backbone that none had believed her capable of.
Though wary of meeting new people, when she befriends you there could be no less loyal a companion or friend. She is a fiercesome creature, willing to fight to the death in defense of hearth, home, and those she loves or calls friend. If she sets herself on a mission or cause, she will see it done; one way or another. She will never stand by and watch a bully in action, having had to take this for years herself. She will step in to the defense of the underdog and take them (possibly literally) under her wing. She cannot stomach senseless violence, or people that cannot see worth in things around them (be those things people, creatures, plants, etc).
She wants nothing more than to feel acceptance and love, so the notion that she can receive this from someone, even if paying with her prize token, is acceptable to her. Amberdrake's refusal of her confused advance leads her back into a loop of self-loathing and self-deprecation. Not even he, someone that lives to heal and make gryphons lovely, sees her as anything more than ugly and misshapen. When 'Drake begins to show her that her differences are an advancement and not a hindrance, she does not believe him at first.
However, when asked if Urtho would deliberately make her anything less than perfect, her denial is absolute and instantaneous. Their Father would never create something less than perfect in his eyes, something that his children believe to the very core of their being. This point, though, had never been brought up to the heart-sick gyrfalcon before. She begins to look at her differences in a whole new way, taking a certain degree of pride in that she can fly Circuits faster and higher than any others in the Wing; even if those Circuits are just for fledglings.
Zhaneel begins to think, to hope, that there is a very deliberate reason that she looks the way she looks.
What is Zhaneel?: A desire to not only survive, but to excel. When Amberdrake reads Zhaneels emotions and finds her suicidal, he also notes in her a desire to be recognized and to make her death count for something. It's not that she wants to make an impression on those around her (though she does seek to impress the attractive Skan), but that she wishes to prove she's better than she is thought of.
No matter that she's been beaten down emotional for years, Zhaneel still has an inner fire burning within her; a will to not simply live, but to thrive. She wants to do well and prove that she can do anything and everything thrown at her. And though she does not believe herself worthy of praise when completing a task, it's her own personal victory that she did succeed. She wants to see gryphons given the respect they are do and to see them treated as the sentient and brave creatures that they are.
She sets out to make her obstacle course to prove her worth to others (and herself), that she was made different because she is special, not because she was a mistake or a cull. Though it was Amberdrake that instilled these thoughts in her originally, it is she that is ingenious enough to design the course; a course that only she is able to maneuver without injuring herself. Her self-worth begins to improve drastically, though she finds praise difficult and embarrassing to take. She is not accustomed to being recognized in any fashion, let alone by those of rank.
Zhaneel believes that the gryphons should be treated as any other participant in Urtho's forces and, as she gains her courage, takes it upon herself to voice these opinion when confronted. The lioness part of Zhaneel is made apparent and she fights for her beliefs, showing a backbone that none had believed her capable of.
Though wary of meeting new people, when she befriends you there could be no less loyal a companion or friend. She is a fiercesome creature, willing to fight to the death in defense of hearth, home, and those she loves or calls friend. If she sets herself on a mission or cause, she will see it done; one way or another. She will never stand by and watch a bully in action, having had to take this for years herself. She will step in to the defense of the underdog and take them (possibly literally) under her wing. She cannot stomach senseless violence, or people that cannot see worth in things around them (be those things people, creatures, plants, etc).
Reply
Leave a comment