Fic: Setting up For a Fall (Carrie/Casey) R-NC-17
Title: Setting up For a Fall
Author: Misa_05
Pairing: Carrie Bishop and Casey Gant. Carrie POV
Rating: R- NC-17. For Language and sex.
Word Count: 3000+
Spoilers/Timeline: First Season. Takes place between Mars Vs Mars and Ruskie Business
Summary:You’d like to believe that you knew where this was going to go after the first time you pulled him into a mop closet between sixth and seventh period, but in reality you have no clue what you are doing.
Warnings: Some sex and language.
Authors Notes: Written for the 09erdom Mix- n-Match Ficathon. XPosted to 09erdom and veronicamarsfic
Mucho thanks and kisses to my beta fickledame.
Any constructive concrit send me at misa_05@livejournal.com
I hope you enjoy.
The first time you let him kiss you, you decide that you have finally lost your mind, and promise yourself you’ll never let it happen again. You weren’t the type of girl to just hook up with whoever was around. You never have been and no matter how much you wanted to, you never would, especially with Casey - Casey was a dog and you had heard all the shit he had done to his previous girls and knew just somehow he would let it slip and your little hook up would be all over the boys’ locker room by first period and by the end of second the entire school would know. Everyone knew this and of course you did, you had helped spread the rumors about what he had done. You didn’t know how much was true, but you knew some of it had to be because this was Neptune and shit always happens.
You were the first one to start the rumor of him fucking his teacher. You had seen them hugging in her classroom and you ran straight to Susan because this was just too good to be true. Here he was, cheating on his girlfriend. With a teacher. The administration would have loved it. You could already see that teacher getting the boot especially after all of the other stories that had been going on that year around the world about female teachers seducing her students. It was all you could talk about and when you finally told Susan about Casey she quickly shut you up by telling you that if he indeed was fucking a teacher than it was his business and it didn’t need to be spread around school.
That’s what you think made things change between you and Susan. And you knew that she had a secret and she wasn’t telling you. This hurt because you told each other everything. You always had.
It had never made any sense to you why Susan would have defended Casey until she told you that she was sleeping with Mr. Rooks. To make things worse, he had dumped her when she told him that she was pregnant. But you knew you were really disgusted with him when she told you he asked her to get an abortion. When she finished her tale she told you, you understood why she would want her privacy and why she thought you should give it to Casey as well.
You had always thought that Casey was hot, because, lets face it - he is. You had been socializing with him since forever and you had seen him grow up from the adorable kid to the hot 09er boy who didn’t give a damn about anything. He was laid back and took everything in stride and you knew that sooner or later the relationship between you would definitely change. And it wasn’t something you were afraid of because sooner or later everything changes.
But you never thought it would change while you were staring up at him and he was staring down at you after he had just made you breathless with a kiss. Some part of you knew that he was trying to make you feel better because most of the school hated you by coming out and saying that you had had an affair with the most popular teacher at Neptune High. You knew that there would be backlash because lets face it - Mr. Rooks is one of the best teachers in this school and everyone adored him - well everyone except for you. It still pissed you off that even Susan still defended him and no matter what you tried to do to convince her to change her mind and file charges she would just let it go and tell you that she understood where he was coming from. That’s when you had decided that you would get justice for your best friend.
But you never thought in a million years that it would lead you straight to Casey Gants lips. And more.
--
It was a cycle that you both were bound to repeat again and again. After the first taste of his lips, his tongue, you knew that you were never going to be able to get enough of him. You’d like to believe that you knew where this was going to go after the first time you pulled him into a mop closet between sixth and seventh period, but in reality you have no clue what you are doing.
All you know is that when he touches your body, you shiver and when he tastes that spot at the hollow of your throat you just want to get on your knees and thank God that he gave you this opportunity.
You are not a couple and frankly you don’t mind that. You don’t know how he feels about you, but you think it must be a high opinion because when he is pressed against you, all hard male and rough edges you can feel the tension, the want in his body. You want to ask him what he is feeling and what it is you are doing, but then he doing that talented thing to your neck and all you can do is moan his name and hold him closer.
And no matter how much of a chatter box you are, there are still times when all you can do is surrender in compliance.
--
It takes you a ridiculous short amount of time to come all over his fingers. You are pushed against the back wall of the coffee shop you are now working at. Your parents had the great idea that you needed to learn a few things about life and lying about things like sleeping with your teacher wasn’t appropriate things to learn.
Your parents even told you to stop seeing Susan because it was all of her fault that you now had a record of lying and falsely accusing someone. And on top of that your mother had come to you the morning of your first day of work and told you that you have embarrassed your family enough. And that this will teach you some responsibility.
You had told Casey that morning in school that you had gotten a job and he had looked at you as if you had sprouted another head. You cautiously told him the details of what had happened that morning and he gave you a small smile and wished you good luck before pulling you around the corner.
It’s that memory of earlier that morning along with the delicious feelings he is invoking in you, along with his fingers curving inside of you hitting that spot, while he is slowly laving kisses along your throat that you come in a mess of shaky limbs.
You rest for a second and realize that your break is almost up. You look up at him and he smiles down at you and it’s just like the first time he kissed you and an unfamiliar feeling is fluttering in your chest. But you know not to let it mean anything because this is Casey and just like all the 09er boys, he is a jackass and sooner or later he is going to make you hurt and tumble and fall.
And you wonder why that doesn’t scare the shit out of you.
--
He meets you after work that very same night and you end up getting a cup of coffee together. It’s weird to just be around each other and not be trying to bring his body next to yours.
He hasn’t told you what he feels for you and you haven’t even begun to try to discuss what you are feeling for him because you know that if you let yourself acknowledge what you feel that it will hurt that much more when it gets taken away.
You know that sounds very depressing, but you can’t help but feel that way. Everything you ever cared about has been taken away. Life is perfect and Lilly Kane dies and you and your whole world of friends change, you try to help your best friend and your parents tell you to stay away from her, and slowly, so slowly, you know because of what you did, that your reputation is going further down the drain no matter how bad it was before. But you know that they can’t take everything away for you, because you are a 09er and you are rich and beautiful and in Neptune that’s all that really matters.
It’s looking into Casey’s eyes that make you feel that you are worth more than Neptune has to offer. He knows what its like to be stereotyped. He is rich, gorgeous and he knows about all of the dirty little things that Neptune tries to hide. It’s refreshing to know, that he knows that there is more to this little life in Neptune that won’t matter that much once graduation comes.
It is comforting in a way that you never thought it would be.
--
The first time you are actually alone with him (not at school, or in the back of the coffee shop building, you are brought up to his room because no one is home and his mom is out gallivanting the world like she has been since his grandmother died. He tells you that it was all of the money in his family is from his grandmother’s fortune but since she died his mother has been doing what she wants with it. He tells you that she is never home now and when she is its just to try to get more money.
You see the pain in his eyes as he talks about his grandmother and all you can do is hug him and want to protect him, which is kind of sad because he is like two inches taller than you and you are tiny compared to him. He hugs you back and takes comfort and it’s as if he is starved for it. You wonder who comforted him before. Had it been Darcy? Or was it that teacher Ms. Mills?
He kisses you as if you are a delicate thing and when he slips his tongue in your mouth all you can do is hold on to him and hope that this feeling that is between the both of you never goes away.
You are so wrapped up with the taste of him and the silkiness of his tongue that you don’t notice that he is slowly unbuttoning your blouse and begins to take it off of you. The cool air hits your skin and you shiver, though not really sure if it’s the breeze or if it’s this boy who knows all the places to make you moan.
You break the kiss and look into his eyes needing to know that he is feeling the same things you are and needing to know that this isn’t just some sort of one night stand. It looks like reassurance when you look deep enough.
You slowly raise his shirt up over his head and you take a look at his body. Your breath catches in your throat and all you can do is kiss him before you start sprouting out poetry and the funny thing is you don’t even like poetry, but looking at him and touching him and feeling him all you want to do is whisper words of love and in a way that is poetry and its bad.
You’re not quite sure how you both lose your clothes so quickly but the thoughts out of your mind in a flash because he is above and sliding into and oh God you’ve never felt this full before. You’ve never thought that it would be like this and you like that he can surprise you.
You reach up and tangle your fingers into his hair pulling him down. Your mouths clash together hotly, wetly, tangling in a twisted dance of teeth, lips, and spit. You lift your legs higher around his waist arching up against him, moving along the rhythm with him and it’s a new experience to be experiencing the emotions and feelings all at once.
You wonder if this is how it always is, but you know deep down it isn’t. It wasn’t like this when you lost your virginity to John Enbom. It hurt and it just felt wrong. This feels right and now he’s speeding up his thrusts and your body is shaking in pleasure that you have no control of.
He groans into your shoulder and collapses into your arms and all you can do is hold him tight and hold on to this feeling. You realize that he isn’t like all of the other 09er boys. All of them would have hurried off you and told you pack up and go. But not him. He is holding you and letting you hold him and it’s amazing. You curl up in his arms like a sated cat and he kisses the back of your neck and cuddle tighter into him.
You sigh happily, but there is still that doubt in the back of your mind that says this story isn’t over and Carrie, you aren’t going to live happily ever after.
And for some reason you believe it.
--
He ignores you the next day at school. You try to catch his eyes and try to engage him in a conversation in class and he mumbles and looks away which is weird because he is tense and it looks like he wants to get as far away as possible.
You never really understood how much this could hurt, but you know that he won’t say anything especially if he is backed into a corner. So you suck up what pride you have left, turn around, and walk away from him.
You lock yourself in the bathroom, the same bathroom that you gossiped about Casey in and cry. You cry for that feeling you felt inside yourself when you were with him, that feeling you knew that was growing inside of you and most of all you cry because you knew, you knew that this was going to happen but convinced yourself that this was different. He was different.
And as you wipe your eyes and curse him and yourself you can’t blame yourself for still wanting him and that only makes you hate yourself more.
--
You stay away and keep your eyes away from him a week. When you do finally look up from a class that both of you have together you notice that he’s looking at you. You can’t really describe the emotions on his face because you know that you’d be wrong-you’d already done that before and you were not going to do that again.
You turn your head away, but the rest of the period you can feel his eyes lingering over your skin, still giving you tingles. You wish you could wash his touch from your skin, but you have tried and failed. You have scrubbed your body, but you can feel him on your skin like little children’s hand prints along the walls.
You long to turn around and reach for him, to beckon him closer, but you are not strong and he has already crushed you and let you fall once.
And you won’t let it happen again.
--
He corners you at work and he won’t leave you alone. You hope the old saying ‘Ignore it and it’ll go away’ will work for you, but so far its leaving something left to be desired.
He tries to tell you that he is sorry and that he didn’t mean to be so cruel. You accuse him of being just like all the other guys in school and he gets the wounded look on his face and again you just want to take his pain away. But you won’t. He didn’t take your pain away. He was the one who caused it.
You turn away from him to walk away and he turns you around and tries to make you listen to reason. He tries to tell you that if you just give him another chance that he will be better. He is better. He was just scared of the feelings that he was getting.
You ask him about those feelings and ask him was it before or after he nailed you that those feelings began. He tells you that it started before but it all just came straight to the surface on that night. He doesn’t need to say which night it is because you know. You know. You still dream about that night and on those nights you wake up shaking from the feeling of him between your legs and your legs wrapped around his hips and you cry. You cry because you miss him, and you cry because you were so sure that he was feeling that same feeling you were that night.
It’s that same feeling that he is telling you that he is feeling now that made him run away.
He asks you to give him another chance…
…And you tell him you aren’t ready. You don’t trust him. You did. But you don’t anymore. You can’t. And that hurts more than it should. You tell him to give you time and he says okay. He gives you a chaste kiss on the cheek that brings tears to your eyes.
You hope that every thing will soon be okay.
You pray that every thing will be okay.
--
It’s the sight of Logan Echolls and Veronica Mars being nice together and being gentle in the hallway at school that you realize that there has been a shift in Neptune. Not only in your life, but in the lives around you.
You can’t remember a time when Logan and Veronica haven’t hurt each other and you know if they are now being nice together and actually walking down the hall smiling at each other that there is hope to be happy in this world.
You glance down at Casey from your locker and it takes him a minute to glance up at you. He gives you a small smile and you return it and even though you know that everything is not okay now, it will be. And you’re okay with that.
Author: Misa_05
Pairing: Carrie Bishop and Casey Gant. Carrie POV
Rating: R- NC-17. For Language and sex.
Word Count: 3000+
Spoilers/Timeline: First Season. Takes place between Mars Vs Mars and Ruskie Business
Summary:You’d like to believe that you knew where this was going to go after the first time you pulled him into a mop closet between sixth and seventh period, but in reality you have no clue what you are doing.
Warnings: Some sex and language.
Authors Notes: Written for the 09erdom Mix- n-Match Ficathon. XPosted to 09erdom and veronicamarsfic
Mucho thanks and kisses to my beta fickledame.
Any constructive concrit send me at misa_05@livejournal.com
I hope you enjoy.
The first time you let him kiss you, you decide that you have finally lost your mind, and promise yourself you’ll never let it happen again. You weren’t the type of girl to just hook up with whoever was around. You never have been and no matter how much you wanted to, you never would, especially with Casey - Casey was a dog and you had heard all the shit he had done to his previous girls and knew just somehow he would let it slip and your little hook up would be all over the boys’ locker room by first period and by the end of second the entire school would know. Everyone knew this and of course you did, you had helped spread the rumors about what he had done. You didn’t know how much was true, but you knew some of it had to be because this was Neptune and shit always happens.
You were the first one to start the rumor of him fucking his teacher. You had seen them hugging in her classroom and you ran straight to Susan because this was just too good to be true. Here he was, cheating on his girlfriend. With a teacher. The administration would have loved it. You could already see that teacher getting the boot especially after all of the other stories that had been going on that year around the world about female teachers seducing her students. It was all you could talk about and when you finally told Susan about Casey she quickly shut you up by telling you that if he indeed was fucking a teacher than it was his business and it didn’t need to be spread around school.
That’s what you think made things change between you and Susan. And you knew that she had a secret and she wasn’t telling you. This hurt because you told each other everything. You always had.
It had never made any sense to you why Susan would have defended Casey until she told you that she was sleeping with Mr. Rooks. To make things worse, he had dumped her when she told him that she was pregnant. But you knew you were really disgusted with him when she told you he asked her to get an abortion. When she finished her tale she told you, you understood why she would want her privacy and why she thought you should give it to Casey as well.
You had always thought that Casey was hot, because, lets face it - he is. You had been socializing with him since forever and you had seen him grow up from the adorable kid to the hot 09er boy who didn’t give a damn about anything. He was laid back and took everything in stride and you knew that sooner or later the relationship between you would definitely change. And it wasn’t something you were afraid of because sooner or later everything changes.
But you never thought it would change while you were staring up at him and he was staring down at you after he had just made you breathless with a kiss. Some part of you knew that he was trying to make you feel better because most of the school hated you by coming out and saying that you had had an affair with the most popular teacher at Neptune High. You knew that there would be backlash because lets face it - Mr. Rooks is one of the best teachers in this school and everyone adored him - well everyone except for you. It still pissed you off that even Susan still defended him and no matter what you tried to do to convince her to change her mind and file charges she would just let it go and tell you that she understood where he was coming from. That’s when you had decided that you would get justice for your best friend.
But you never thought in a million years that it would lead you straight to Casey Gants lips. And more.
--
It was a cycle that you both were bound to repeat again and again. After the first taste of his lips, his tongue, you knew that you were never going to be able to get enough of him. You’d like to believe that you knew where this was going to go after the first time you pulled him into a mop closet between sixth and seventh period, but in reality you have no clue what you are doing.
All you know is that when he touches your body, you shiver and when he tastes that spot at the hollow of your throat you just want to get on your knees and thank God that he gave you this opportunity.
You are not a couple and frankly you don’t mind that. You don’t know how he feels about you, but you think it must be a high opinion because when he is pressed against you, all hard male and rough edges you can feel the tension, the want in his body. You want to ask him what he is feeling and what it is you are doing, but then he doing that talented thing to your neck and all you can do is moan his name and hold him closer.
And no matter how much of a chatter box you are, there are still times when all you can do is surrender in compliance.
--
It takes you a ridiculous short amount of time to come all over his fingers. You are pushed against the back wall of the coffee shop you are now working at. Your parents had the great idea that you needed to learn a few things about life and lying about things like sleeping with your teacher wasn’t appropriate things to learn.
Your parents even told you to stop seeing Susan because it was all of her fault that you now had a record of lying and falsely accusing someone. And on top of that your mother had come to you the morning of your first day of work and told you that you have embarrassed your family enough. And that this will teach you some responsibility.
You had told Casey that morning in school that you had gotten a job and he had looked at you as if you had sprouted another head. You cautiously told him the details of what had happened that morning and he gave you a small smile and wished you good luck before pulling you around the corner.
It’s that memory of earlier that morning along with the delicious feelings he is invoking in you, along with his fingers curving inside of you hitting that spot, while he is slowly laving kisses along your throat that you come in a mess of shaky limbs.
You rest for a second and realize that your break is almost up. You look up at him and he smiles down at you and it’s just like the first time he kissed you and an unfamiliar feeling is fluttering in your chest. But you know not to let it mean anything because this is Casey and just like all the 09er boys, he is a jackass and sooner or later he is going to make you hurt and tumble and fall.
And you wonder why that doesn’t scare the shit out of you.
--
He meets you after work that very same night and you end up getting a cup of coffee together. It’s weird to just be around each other and not be trying to bring his body next to yours.
He hasn’t told you what he feels for you and you haven’t even begun to try to discuss what you are feeling for him because you know that if you let yourself acknowledge what you feel that it will hurt that much more when it gets taken away.
You know that sounds very depressing, but you can’t help but feel that way. Everything you ever cared about has been taken away. Life is perfect and Lilly Kane dies and you and your whole world of friends change, you try to help your best friend and your parents tell you to stay away from her, and slowly, so slowly, you know because of what you did, that your reputation is going further down the drain no matter how bad it was before. But you know that they can’t take everything away for you, because you are a 09er and you are rich and beautiful and in Neptune that’s all that really matters.
It’s looking into Casey’s eyes that make you feel that you are worth more than Neptune has to offer. He knows what its like to be stereotyped. He is rich, gorgeous and he knows about all of the dirty little things that Neptune tries to hide. It’s refreshing to know, that he knows that there is more to this little life in Neptune that won’t matter that much once graduation comes.
It is comforting in a way that you never thought it would be.
--
The first time you are actually alone with him (not at school, or in the back of the coffee shop building, you are brought up to his room because no one is home and his mom is out gallivanting the world like she has been since his grandmother died. He tells you that it was all of the money in his family is from his grandmother’s fortune but since she died his mother has been doing what she wants with it. He tells you that she is never home now and when she is its just to try to get more money.
You see the pain in his eyes as he talks about his grandmother and all you can do is hug him and want to protect him, which is kind of sad because he is like two inches taller than you and you are tiny compared to him. He hugs you back and takes comfort and it’s as if he is starved for it. You wonder who comforted him before. Had it been Darcy? Or was it that teacher Ms. Mills?
He kisses you as if you are a delicate thing and when he slips his tongue in your mouth all you can do is hold on to him and hope that this feeling that is between the both of you never goes away.
You are so wrapped up with the taste of him and the silkiness of his tongue that you don’t notice that he is slowly unbuttoning your blouse and begins to take it off of you. The cool air hits your skin and you shiver, though not really sure if it’s the breeze or if it’s this boy who knows all the places to make you moan.
You break the kiss and look into his eyes needing to know that he is feeling the same things you are and needing to know that this isn’t just some sort of one night stand. It looks like reassurance when you look deep enough.
You slowly raise his shirt up over his head and you take a look at his body. Your breath catches in your throat and all you can do is kiss him before you start sprouting out poetry and the funny thing is you don’t even like poetry, but looking at him and touching him and feeling him all you want to do is whisper words of love and in a way that is poetry and its bad.
You’re not quite sure how you both lose your clothes so quickly but the thoughts out of your mind in a flash because he is above and sliding into and oh God you’ve never felt this full before. You’ve never thought that it would be like this and you like that he can surprise you.
You reach up and tangle your fingers into his hair pulling him down. Your mouths clash together hotly, wetly, tangling in a twisted dance of teeth, lips, and spit. You lift your legs higher around his waist arching up against him, moving along the rhythm with him and it’s a new experience to be experiencing the emotions and feelings all at once.
You wonder if this is how it always is, but you know deep down it isn’t. It wasn’t like this when you lost your virginity to John Enbom. It hurt and it just felt wrong. This feels right and now he’s speeding up his thrusts and your body is shaking in pleasure that you have no control of.
He groans into your shoulder and collapses into your arms and all you can do is hold him tight and hold on to this feeling. You realize that he isn’t like all of the other 09er boys. All of them would have hurried off you and told you pack up and go. But not him. He is holding you and letting you hold him and it’s amazing. You curl up in his arms like a sated cat and he kisses the back of your neck and cuddle tighter into him.
You sigh happily, but there is still that doubt in the back of your mind that says this story isn’t over and Carrie, you aren’t going to live happily ever after.
And for some reason you believe it.
--
He ignores you the next day at school. You try to catch his eyes and try to engage him in a conversation in class and he mumbles and looks away which is weird because he is tense and it looks like he wants to get as far away as possible.
You never really understood how much this could hurt, but you know that he won’t say anything especially if he is backed into a corner. So you suck up what pride you have left, turn around, and walk away from him.
You lock yourself in the bathroom, the same bathroom that you gossiped about Casey in and cry. You cry for that feeling you felt inside yourself when you were with him, that feeling you knew that was growing inside of you and most of all you cry because you knew, you knew that this was going to happen but convinced yourself that this was different. He was different.
And as you wipe your eyes and curse him and yourself you can’t blame yourself for still wanting him and that only makes you hate yourself more.
--
You stay away and keep your eyes away from him a week. When you do finally look up from a class that both of you have together you notice that he’s looking at you. You can’t really describe the emotions on his face because you know that you’d be wrong-you’d already done that before and you were not going to do that again.
You turn your head away, but the rest of the period you can feel his eyes lingering over your skin, still giving you tingles. You wish you could wash his touch from your skin, but you have tried and failed. You have scrubbed your body, but you can feel him on your skin like little children’s hand prints along the walls.
You long to turn around and reach for him, to beckon him closer, but you are not strong and he has already crushed you and let you fall once.
And you won’t let it happen again.
--
He corners you at work and he won’t leave you alone. You hope the old saying ‘Ignore it and it’ll go away’ will work for you, but so far its leaving something left to be desired.
He tries to tell you that he is sorry and that he didn’t mean to be so cruel. You accuse him of being just like all the other guys in school and he gets the wounded look on his face and again you just want to take his pain away. But you won’t. He didn’t take your pain away. He was the one who caused it.
You turn away from him to walk away and he turns you around and tries to make you listen to reason. He tries to tell you that if you just give him another chance that he will be better. He is better. He was just scared of the feelings that he was getting.
You ask him about those feelings and ask him was it before or after he nailed you that those feelings began. He tells you that it started before but it all just came straight to the surface on that night. He doesn’t need to say which night it is because you know. You know. You still dream about that night and on those nights you wake up shaking from the feeling of him between your legs and your legs wrapped around his hips and you cry. You cry because you miss him, and you cry because you were so sure that he was feeling that same feeling you were that night.
It’s that same feeling that he is telling you that he is feeling now that made him run away.
He asks you to give him another chance…
…And you tell him you aren’t ready. You don’t trust him. You did. But you don’t anymore. You can’t. And that hurts more than it should. You tell him to give you time and he says okay. He gives you a chaste kiss on the cheek that brings tears to your eyes.
You hope that every thing will soon be okay.
You pray that every thing will be okay.
--
It’s the sight of Logan Echolls and Veronica Mars being nice together and being gentle in the hallway at school that you realize that there has been a shift in Neptune. Not only in your life, but in the lives around you.
You can’t remember a time when Logan and Veronica haven’t hurt each other and you know if they are now being nice together and actually walking down the hall smiling at each other that there is hope to be happy in this world.
You glance down at Casey from your locker and it takes him a minute to glance up at you. He gives you a small smile and you return it and even though you know that everything is not okay now, it will be. And you’re okay with that.