Ficlet: Maps (Veronica. L/V mentions) PG-13
Title: Maps
Author: Stella
Character: Veronica (V/L mentions)
Rating: PG13-R (there's cussing)
Word Count: 522 for this version. 1269 for extended version at my lj.
Spoilers: Through 2x20
Summary: My version of the aftermath of 2x20
A/N: I posted this up earlier and forgot the word count (sorry, mods.) I'm posting this version because I just re-read the fic and decided that I didn't really like the full fic, but the first part made a pretty cool ficlet so that's what's included here. There's a link to the full fic at the end. Let me know what you think :o)
And she doesn't know what she's doing.
She questions if she ever knew what she was doing. Going to the alterna-prom, listening to Logan's obvioiusly drunken not at all heartfelt relationship analysis, staying up all night thinking about it and him and love, going to see him at the hotel. She really didn't have a clue, did she?
She doesn't know what she's doing now, her vision still blurred with tears and her body trembling with everything - anger, hurt, disappointment, hurt, regret, hurt, hurt hurt. Everything stung when the only thought charred into her mind was one with Kendall's arms wrapped around his body. Everything stung because she could still remember his eyes, honest and loving. Everything stung because she loved him, she fucking loved him.
Somehow she manages to drive. Left, then right then straight onto the PCH and she's going, going, going. She doesn't know where she's going but here was never a good place, not at all.He's an asshole, she thinks waiting for the stop light to go green. But it isn't his fault, if you think about it, and she's thinking. The wheels in her mind are steaming with the speed that doubt and anger and regret spin through. She should have known he was drunk, that their song would always be the most pained, that they weren't them without hurting each other.
The sun's already starting to set when she realizes just how long she's been driving. She hasn't reallly gotten anywhere, just looping around the same landmarks, making the same wrong turns that keep her stuck in this little place that she loves no matter how she denies it. There's a map somewhere, but she'd rather navigate on her own, by feel, by impulse. It's stubborn and she knows it, but that's how she's going to get by.
When she finally pulls into her own apartment complex, she's exhausted. The muscles holding her face together are strained from contorting into frowns and sobs all day. Her eyes are puffy to the point of painful blinking and she doesn't have to touch her cheeks to know they're still damp. They'll be that way for days. She doesn't really know why.
And yet, she does.
She cries because she hurts. She hurts because she believes. She believes because he's Logan. And him being Logan is more than enough of an explanation and yet, she'll never have the right words for him. He's the boy with the infectious laugh and the mischievous eyes. He's tortured and impulsive, volatile and fragile. He's the one she hates, the one that hurts her, the one that said they were epic, the one that slept with Kendall fucking Casablancas. The one she loves.
She's not going to love him anymore. She forgets how intense it is to love Logan Echolls, how draining and painful when he's hurts her. She forces herself to forget how perfect it feels when he loves her back. It's not supposed to be hard - not like this. This is too much, too many wrong turns, so many dead ends and she's scared they're only going in circles because they always are.
*fin*
-click here for the full length fic-
Author: Stella
Character: Veronica (V/L mentions)
Rating: PG13-R (there's cussing)
Word Count: 522 for this version. 1269 for extended version at my lj.
Spoilers: Through 2x20
Summary: My version of the aftermath of 2x20
A/N: I posted this up earlier and forgot the word count (sorry, mods.) I'm posting this version because I just re-read the fic and decided that I didn't really like the full fic, but the first part made a pretty cool ficlet so that's what's included here. There's a link to the full fic at the end. Let me know what you think :o)
And she doesn't know what she's doing.
She questions if she ever knew what she was doing. Going to the alterna-prom, listening to Logan's obvioiusly drunken not at all heartfelt relationship analysis, staying up all night thinking about it and him and love, going to see him at the hotel. She really didn't have a clue, did she?
She doesn't know what she's doing now, her vision still blurred with tears and her body trembling with everything - anger, hurt, disappointment, hurt, regret, hurt, hurt hurt. Everything stung when the only thought charred into her mind was one with Kendall's arms wrapped around his body. Everything stung because she could still remember his eyes, honest and loving. Everything stung because she loved him, she fucking loved him.
Somehow she manages to drive. Left, then right then straight onto the PCH and she's going, going, going. She doesn't know where she's going but here was never a good place, not at all.He's an asshole, she thinks waiting for the stop light to go green. But it isn't his fault, if you think about it, and she's thinking. The wheels in her mind are steaming with the speed that doubt and anger and regret spin through. She should have known he was drunk, that their song would always be the most pained, that they weren't them without hurting each other.
The sun's already starting to set when she realizes just how long she's been driving. She hasn't reallly gotten anywhere, just looping around the same landmarks, making the same wrong turns that keep her stuck in this little place that she loves no matter how she denies it. There's a map somewhere, but she'd rather navigate on her own, by feel, by impulse. It's stubborn and she knows it, but that's how she's going to get by.
When she finally pulls into her own apartment complex, she's exhausted. The muscles holding her face together are strained from contorting into frowns and sobs all day. Her eyes are puffy to the point of painful blinking and she doesn't have to touch her cheeks to know they're still damp. They'll be that way for days. She doesn't really know why.
And yet, she does.
She cries because she hurts. She hurts because she believes. She believes because he's Logan. And him being Logan is more than enough of an explanation and yet, she'll never have the right words for him. He's the boy with the infectious laugh and the mischievous eyes. He's tortured and impulsive, volatile and fragile. He's the one she hates, the one that hurts her, the one that said they were epic, the one that slept with Kendall fucking Casablancas. The one she loves.
She's not going to love him anymore. She forgets how intense it is to love Logan Echolls, how draining and painful when he's hurts her. She forces herself to forget how perfect it feels when he loves her back. It's not supposed to be hard - not like this. This is too much, too many wrong turns, so many dead ends and she's scared they're only going in circles because they always are.
*fin*
-click here for the full length fic-