Fic: How to Escape from a Mountain Lion (LoVe) Strong PG-13
Fic: How to Escape from a Mountain Lion
Author: jacedesbff
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica, Cassidy/Mac, Dick and Madison mentioned
Word Count: 2000+
Rating: Strong PG-13 for sexual situations
Summary: Dictionary.com defines “mountain lion” as “a large, powerful cat”. So what happens when he goes on the prowl?
Spoilers/Warnings: all of seasons 1 and 2
Disclaimer: Rob Thomas. Bless his heart…again and again!
A/N: This was written for the Worst-Case Scenario challenge, found at http://community.livejournal.com/vm_worstcase/. I think you can guess what my challenge was. ::laughs:: All quotes are taken directly from “The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook”, which I have been using in my drama class for years (don’t ask.) :-) Bottom line, I totally LOVED this challenge. And as a hard-core Fluffy McFlufferton LoVe fan, I needed some cheering up. Ha! This did it!!! Thanks again to my awesome beta, Merc 4. :-) Lovin’ the feedback!
How to Avoid an Attack
Mountain lions, also called cougars, have been known to attack people without provocation; aggressive ones have attacked hikers and especially small children, resulting in serious injury. Still, most mountain lions will avoid people. To minimize your contact with cougars in an area inhabited by them, avoid hiking alone and at dusk and dawn, when mountain lions are more active.
Veronica did not want to be at an 09er party. She particularly did not want to be at this 09er party. The sad fact, though, was that Mac didn’t ask for much and during their short but lively friendship Veronica had asked for a lot. So when Mac called and explained to Veronica that she had to go to this particular party because Cassidy was co-hosting, Veronica had very reluctantly agreed. Mac didn’t want to go alone, so to speak, into the lair of the 09er pack. For any other 09er party she wouldn’t have been nearly as reluctant-Veronica totally understood the need to have a wingchick when facing the enemy-but did it have to be this party on this day?
Dick had decided to cheer Logan up. The elder Casablancas brother did not approve of moping over a woman and had let everyone know that it was time to celebrate the murder charges against Logan being dropped. As far as Dick was concerned, losing a girl was immaterial when there was such a good reason to party available. Therefore he had enlisted Cassidy’s help and they had organized “Freedomfest ‘06”, requiring that everyone show up at Casa Casablancas dressed in red, white, and blue. The menu consisted of hot dogs, hamburgers, chips and lots of Coors, Sam Adams and other American beers.
So even though Mac had avoided any and all 09er soirees until now, she had to go to this one. As Cassidy’s official out-of-the-closet girlfriend, she felt the need to support him. And that meant that she needed a wingchick. Which meant that Veronica had to go to an 09er party. Thrown by Dick and Cassidy. For Logan. In protest, Veronica was wearing a camo miniskirt with a black baby tee that bore the tagline “What Part of ‘No’ Do You Not Understand?”
Shortly after she and Mac had arrived, Cassidy had kidnapped Mac and Veronica hadn’t seen them since. She could imagine where they were and what they were doing and she doubted that Mac needed her help to do it. Regardless, she had promised Mac that she would stick around and she figured that meant until at least midnight. At that point she would consider all debts settled.
So instead of being at home watching the new version of “Pride and Prejudice”, Veronica was sitting on a couch in a dimly lit corner of the living room silently watching 09ers shotgun pints of beer as she desperately tried not to remember the details of the dream that she had had the previous night. She hadn’t had a dream like that since she and Duncan had started sleeping together, although she wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.
As it so happened, last night’s dream was the primary reason that she did not want to be at this party on this night. It had been vivid. Very vivid. Very, very vivid. In fact, it hadn’t really been a dream-it was more like a Technicolor freakin’ epic.
And there was the star, making his way across the room to her dimly lit couch. Damn. And he wasn’t wearing a shirt. In the spirit of the occasion, Logan was wearing a sparkly blue vest with sparkly white stars and red and white striped pajama bottoms. Damn.
How to Escape from a Mountain Lion
1. Do not run. The animal most likely will have seen and smelled you already, and running will simply cause it to pay more attention.
Should she leave? Pretend she hadn’t seen him and act like she had to go to the bathroom? She looked towards the hallway-the line was all the way into the living room. No, running wouldn’t help. Logan had already seen her. He was clearly heading towards her and he was clearly on the prowl. She sighed as part of the dream flashed through her mind.
His teeth nipped at her earlobe...
She slammed on the brakes.
This was all her father’s fault. The manager of the Neptune Grand had given him the full story on Hannah’s “rescue” at the hands of her father. Veronica had been…nonplussed. Logan had fallen for Hannah. He had gone out with her in order to use her; he had accomplished his goal; and right when he was supposed to walk away from her without a backward look…he hadn’t. He had risked everything for the girl he was supposed to be using. Damn him.
She couldn’t do this. They couldn’t do this. Duncan hadn’t been gone very long. Hannah hadn’t even been gone a week and a half. Logan was almost to the couch. No, they couldn’t do this.
2. Try to make yourself appear bigger by opening your coat wide. The mountain lion is less likely to attack a larger animal.
“You look happy,” she said.
“You don’t,” he came back.
“I don’t have a good history with 09er parties.”
“I know. So why are you here?” He sat down next to her.
“I promised Mac,” she sighed. “And now she’s off with Cassidy.”
“And you’re here with me.” He put his arm across the back of the sofa.
He smelled really good. No! She should not care how he smelled. It was the dream. Seriously, it had lowered her defenses. Really.
“And you’re not here with Hannah.”
He took his arm down. “She’s in Vermont.”
“And you’re at a party.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
Why did he smell so good? Was he using a special cologne, like one of those ones that had pheromones?
In the dream, there had been that thing he did to her toes…
Brake!
3. Do not crouch down. Hold your ground, wave your hands, and shout. Show it that you are not defenseless.
“Most guys, when their girlfriends are shipped off to boarding school are-I don’t know-sad. They don’t throw parties.”
That wasn’t fair and she knew it. After her dad told her what happened, Veronica had kept an eye on Logan. He had been a wreck. This party was the first time in a week that he didn’t look like death warmed over.
Logan leaned across Veronica in a supposed attempt to grab some peanuts out of the bowl on the end table. All he really did was rub his mostly naked chest across hers.
“Hannah wouldn’t want me to wallow,” he purred as he pulled slowly back to his original position.
4. If you have small children with you, pick them up-do all you can to appear larger.
Madison Sinclair chose that moment to walk across their line of vision.
“Hi, Madison,” Veronica said.
Madison turned to look at her least favorite person. Logan looked up in hopes that naked Jell-o wrestling might ensue.
“What could you possibly want?” Madison said in that way that only she could.
“Just wondering if you’d had any interesting rides in elevators lately.” Veronica managed to say with a straight face. She was proud.
Madison’s features expressed a degree of loathing and contempt that Veronica was pretty sure she’d never seen before. After all, Aaron had been holding the gas can where she couldn’t see him.
“At least my boyfriend sticks around after we have sex. Didn’t yours kidnap his love child and flee the country?” Madison turned her back on Veronica and continued on her way.
No Jell-o wrestling. Logan looked back at Veronica. The vest was even hotter now that she had felt it up close and personal.
That’s it. She was never sleeping again.
5. Back away slowly or wait until the animal moves away. Report any lion sightings to authorities as soon as possible.
Logan obviously wasn’t leaving. Veronica stood up. “I have to go find Mac.”
Logan sat back against the couch. “She and Cassidy went into his bedroom. I can give you directions on how to get there.”
6. If the lion still behaves aggressively, throw stones. Convince the lion that you are not prey and that you may be dangerous yourself.
Veronica put her hands on her hips and looked down at the floor.
She looked up. “This isn’t happening, Logan.”
He leaned further back into the couch. “Really?” His vest parted and she lost her train of thought
7. Fight back if you are attacked. Use sticks, fists, or whatever is at hand. Do not curl up and play dead. Mountain lions generally leap down upon prey from above and deliver a “killing bite” to the back of the neck.
“Really. Haven’t we already been down this road? We don’t work, remember?” He stood up and she physically fought the urge to back away. “Come on, Logan…” He was invading her personal space. She involuntarily took a step back. “Don’t do this.” She kept moving backwards. She didn’t realize that he was maneuvering her until she felt the wall against her back. She looked up at him in surprise.
“Come on, Logan. I don’t want to be your rebound girl.”
He leaned down as though he was going to kiss her, but at the last possible moment his mouth slid across her cheek, barely far enough away to not be touching her, stopping when he reached her ear.
“What makes you think you’d be a rebound?”
Veronica struggled for breath. She put her hand up to push him away, but her hand refused to move once it encountered his bare chest.
Her words came out ragged and in a rush. “The manager…told my dad what…happened with Hannah’s dad…I know you had…feelings for her…”
He didn’t move. His chest against her hand, his lips to her ear, he whispered, “That doesn’t make you a rebound.”
Veronica’s fingers curled against his warm skin. Even though he was leaning down, he was still taller than her. Her mouth was against his neck. Her other hand found his vest and clutched it.
“Why can’t you just be a bad guy, Logan? I’m okay when you’re a bad guy. Why do you have to have…depth?” She could hear the choked tears in her voice. This is why she hadn’t wanted to come tonight. She couldn’t hate Logan when he kept doing things to prove that he was a good person. Despite the efforts of Tinseltown Diaries to convince everyone that the opposite was true, Logan was a good man. And if she couldn’t hate Logan… She tried to move her head to the side, away from his mouth.
WARNING
When a life is imperiled or a dire situation is at hand, safe alternatives may not exist. … The publisher, authors, and experts disclaim any liability from any injury that may result from the use, proper or improper, of the information contained in this book. … And finally, nothing in this book should be construed or interpreted to infringe on the rights of other persons.
Logan followed her attempted flight with his lips, kissing his way down her neck to her collarbone. Man, this was so much better than her dream. Her dream! Her mind cleared for a fraction of a second and she wondered if she was allowing this to happen because of that motion picture of a dream.
Logan put his hands around her waist and picked her up, bringing about the necessity of her wrapping her legs around his waist.
“The better to kiss you with, my dear,” his mouth whispered against hers.
No, this was about them, not about a dream, she thought as she lost herself in his kiss. He was a good man, and he deserved to be loved and it would be wrong for her to deny him that when in truth that’s all she wanted to give him.
Sometimes it’s just best to let nature take over.
The End
Author: jacedesbff
Pairing/Character: Logan/Veronica, Cassidy/Mac, Dick and Madison mentioned
Word Count: 2000+
Rating: Strong PG-13 for sexual situations
Summary: Dictionary.com defines “mountain lion” as “a large, powerful cat”. So what happens when he goes on the prowl?
Spoilers/Warnings: all of seasons 1 and 2
Disclaimer: Rob Thomas. Bless his heart…again and again!
A/N: This was written for the Worst-Case Scenario challenge, found at http://community.livejournal.com/vm_worstcase/. I think you can guess what my challenge was. ::laughs:: All quotes are taken directly from “The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook”, which I have been using in my drama class for years (don’t ask.) :-) Bottom line, I totally LOVED this challenge. And as a hard-core Fluffy McFlufferton LoVe fan, I needed some cheering up. Ha! This did it!!! Thanks again to my awesome beta, Merc 4. :-) Lovin’ the feedback!
How to Avoid an Attack
Mountain lions, also called cougars, have been known to attack people without provocation; aggressive ones have attacked hikers and especially small children, resulting in serious injury. Still, most mountain lions will avoid people. To minimize your contact with cougars in an area inhabited by them, avoid hiking alone and at dusk and dawn, when mountain lions are more active.
Veronica did not want to be at an 09er party. She particularly did not want to be at this 09er party. The sad fact, though, was that Mac didn’t ask for much and during their short but lively friendship Veronica had asked for a lot. So when Mac called and explained to Veronica that she had to go to this particular party because Cassidy was co-hosting, Veronica had very reluctantly agreed. Mac didn’t want to go alone, so to speak, into the lair of the 09er pack. For any other 09er party she wouldn’t have been nearly as reluctant-Veronica totally understood the need to have a wingchick when facing the enemy-but did it have to be this party on this day?
Dick had decided to cheer Logan up. The elder Casablancas brother did not approve of moping over a woman and had let everyone know that it was time to celebrate the murder charges against Logan being dropped. As far as Dick was concerned, losing a girl was immaterial when there was such a good reason to party available. Therefore he had enlisted Cassidy’s help and they had organized “Freedomfest ‘06”, requiring that everyone show up at Casa Casablancas dressed in red, white, and blue. The menu consisted of hot dogs, hamburgers, chips and lots of Coors, Sam Adams and other American beers.
So even though Mac had avoided any and all 09er soirees until now, she had to go to this one. As Cassidy’s official out-of-the-closet girlfriend, she felt the need to support him. And that meant that she needed a wingchick. Which meant that Veronica had to go to an 09er party. Thrown by Dick and Cassidy. For Logan. In protest, Veronica was wearing a camo miniskirt with a black baby tee that bore the tagline “What Part of ‘No’ Do You Not Understand?”
Shortly after she and Mac had arrived, Cassidy had kidnapped Mac and Veronica hadn’t seen them since. She could imagine where they were and what they were doing and she doubted that Mac needed her help to do it. Regardless, she had promised Mac that she would stick around and she figured that meant until at least midnight. At that point she would consider all debts settled.
So instead of being at home watching the new version of “Pride and Prejudice”, Veronica was sitting on a couch in a dimly lit corner of the living room silently watching 09ers shotgun pints of beer as she desperately tried not to remember the details of the dream that she had had the previous night. She hadn’t had a dream like that since she and Duncan had started sleeping together, although she wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.
As it so happened, last night’s dream was the primary reason that she did not want to be at this party on this night. It had been vivid. Very vivid. Very, very vivid. In fact, it hadn’t really been a dream-it was more like a Technicolor freakin’ epic.
And there was the star, making his way across the room to her dimly lit couch. Damn. And he wasn’t wearing a shirt. In the spirit of the occasion, Logan was wearing a sparkly blue vest with sparkly white stars and red and white striped pajama bottoms. Damn.
How to Escape from a Mountain Lion
1. Do not run. The animal most likely will have seen and smelled you already, and running will simply cause it to pay more attention.
Should she leave? Pretend she hadn’t seen him and act like she had to go to the bathroom? She looked towards the hallway-the line was all the way into the living room. No, running wouldn’t help. Logan had already seen her. He was clearly heading towards her and he was clearly on the prowl. She sighed as part of the dream flashed through her mind.
His teeth nipped at her earlobe...
She slammed on the brakes.
This was all her father’s fault. The manager of the Neptune Grand had given him the full story on Hannah’s “rescue” at the hands of her father. Veronica had been…nonplussed. Logan had fallen for Hannah. He had gone out with her in order to use her; he had accomplished his goal; and right when he was supposed to walk away from her without a backward look…he hadn’t. He had risked everything for the girl he was supposed to be using. Damn him.
She couldn’t do this. They couldn’t do this. Duncan hadn’t been gone very long. Hannah hadn’t even been gone a week and a half. Logan was almost to the couch. No, they couldn’t do this.
2. Try to make yourself appear bigger by opening your coat wide. The mountain lion is less likely to attack a larger animal.
“You look happy,” she said.
“You don’t,” he came back.
“I don’t have a good history with 09er parties.”
“I know. So why are you here?” He sat down next to her.
“I promised Mac,” she sighed. “And now she’s off with Cassidy.”
“And you’re here with me.” He put his arm across the back of the sofa.
He smelled really good. No! She should not care how he smelled. It was the dream. Seriously, it had lowered her defenses. Really.
“And you’re not here with Hannah.”
He took his arm down. “She’s in Vermont.”
“And you’re at a party.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
Why did he smell so good? Was he using a special cologne, like one of those ones that had pheromones?
In the dream, there had been that thing he did to her toes…
Brake!
3. Do not crouch down. Hold your ground, wave your hands, and shout. Show it that you are not defenseless.
“Most guys, when their girlfriends are shipped off to boarding school are-I don’t know-sad. They don’t throw parties.”
That wasn’t fair and she knew it. After her dad told her what happened, Veronica had kept an eye on Logan. He had been a wreck. This party was the first time in a week that he didn’t look like death warmed over.
Logan leaned across Veronica in a supposed attempt to grab some peanuts out of the bowl on the end table. All he really did was rub his mostly naked chest across hers.
“Hannah wouldn’t want me to wallow,” he purred as he pulled slowly back to his original position.
4. If you have small children with you, pick them up-do all you can to appear larger.
Madison Sinclair chose that moment to walk across their line of vision.
“Hi, Madison,” Veronica said.
Madison turned to look at her least favorite person. Logan looked up in hopes that naked Jell-o wrestling might ensue.
“What could you possibly want?” Madison said in that way that only she could.
“Just wondering if you’d had any interesting rides in elevators lately.” Veronica managed to say with a straight face. She was proud.
Madison’s features expressed a degree of loathing and contempt that Veronica was pretty sure she’d never seen before. After all, Aaron had been holding the gas can where she couldn’t see him.
“At least my boyfriend sticks around after we have sex. Didn’t yours kidnap his love child and flee the country?” Madison turned her back on Veronica and continued on her way.
No Jell-o wrestling. Logan looked back at Veronica. The vest was even hotter now that she had felt it up close and personal.
That’s it. She was never sleeping again.
5. Back away slowly or wait until the animal moves away. Report any lion sightings to authorities as soon as possible.
Logan obviously wasn’t leaving. Veronica stood up. “I have to go find Mac.”
Logan sat back against the couch. “She and Cassidy went into his bedroom. I can give you directions on how to get there.”
6. If the lion still behaves aggressively, throw stones. Convince the lion that you are not prey and that you may be dangerous yourself.
Veronica put her hands on her hips and looked down at the floor.
She looked up. “This isn’t happening, Logan.”
He leaned further back into the couch. “Really?” His vest parted and she lost her train of thought
7. Fight back if you are attacked. Use sticks, fists, or whatever is at hand. Do not curl up and play dead. Mountain lions generally leap down upon prey from above and deliver a “killing bite” to the back of the neck.
“Really. Haven’t we already been down this road? We don’t work, remember?” He stood up and she physically fought the urge to back away. “Come on, Logan…” He was invading her personal space. She involuntarily took a step back. “Don’t do this.” She kept moving backwards. She didn’t realize that he was maneuvering her until she felt the wall against her back. She looked up at him in surprise.
“Come on, Logan. I don’t want to be your rebound girl.”
He leaned down as though he was going to kiss her, but at the last possible moment his mouth slid across her cheek, barely far enough away to not be touching her, stopping when he reached her ear.
“What makes you think you’d be a rebound?”
Veronica struggled for breath. She put her hand up to push him away, but her hand refused to move once it encountered his bare chest.
Her words came out ragged and in a rush. “The manager…told my dad what…happened with Hannah’s dad…I know you had…feelings for her…”
He didn’t move. His chest against her hand, his lips to her ear, he whispered, “That doesn’t make you a rebound.”
Veronica’s fingers curled against his warm skin. Even though he was leaning down, he was still taller than her. Her mouth was against his neck. Her other hand found his vest and clutched it.
“Why can’t you just be a bad guy, Logan? I’m okay when you’re a bad guy. Why do you have to have…depth?” She could hear the choked tears in her voice. This is why she hadn’t wanted to come tonight. She couldn’t hate Logan when he kept doing things to prove that he was a good person. Despite the efforts of Tinseltown Diaries to convince everyone that the opposite was true, Logan was a good man. And if she couldn’t hate Logan… She tried to move her head to the side, away from his mouth.
WARNING
When a life is imperiled or a dire situation is at hand, safe alternatives may not exist. … The publisher, authors, and experts disclaim any liability from any injury that may result from the use, proper or improper, of the information contained in this book. … And finally, nothing in this book should be construed or interpreted to infringe on the rights of other persons.
Logan followed her attempted flight with his lips, kissing his way down her neck to her collarbone. Man, this was so much better than her dream. Her dream! Her mind cleared for a fraction of a second and she wondered if she was allowing this to happen because of that motion picture of a dream.
Logan put his hands around her waist and picked her up, bringing about the necessity of her wrapping her legs around his waist.
“The better to kiss you with, my dear,” his mouth whispered against hers.
No, this was about them, not about a dream, she thought as she lost herself in his kiss. He was a good man, and he deserved to be loved and it would be wrong for her to deny him that when in truth that’s all she wanted to give him.
Sometimes it’s just best to let nature take over.
The End