Some RL yay and yet MORE fandom *yawn*

[veronica_rich]

I had a meeting today with the daily paper's main editor and some local charity people to do a series of about 15 human interest feature profiles this fall for Sunday papers September through November. It's my normal freelance rate, but it's extra money and better, it's a chance to write creatively, which I don't get to do much for money anymore (I

Comments

[pir8fancier]

You probably know my opinions on this ad nauseam, but anyway.

I think there are no slashy bits because there is literally NO interaction between the main characters, with the exception of Jack and Elizabeth. The meatiest conversations we have are between J/E, Beckett/Swann/, Will/Bootstrap. This is not a slasher's paradise. In fact, I would go on to say that all the comraderie established in the first movie between Jack/Will, James/Jack has been rent asunder, so to speak. The characters in the first movie were often in conflict. But there was sass and interaction and a general chemistry between pretty much all of them. In this movie? Flails. There is NO chemistry between the characters. Part of it in the structure of the movie. They don't have the firggin time to interact with each other. All scenes are either ugly confrontations or slapstick crap that doesn't lend itself to any chemistry. There are no small character defining movements in this movie. I mean let's look at something simple. When Will goes to the governor's mansion the first time to deliver Norrington's sword. The bit with the sconce. That was hilarious, gave us insight into Will's character, showed us how nervous he was and when Elizabeth appeared we knew WHY. In this movie there are no small touches. They laid everything on with a fucking trowel.

Regarding J/E. I absolutely fail to see any chemistry between them. I actually had an AU island scene floating in my head after POTC1. I could never write it now because the dynamic between the two of them is NON-existent in my book. How people can get hot and bothered over that kissing scene is beyond me. And I have such hots for Johnny Depp that he could probably be kissing the mast and I'd get a hard on (metaphorically speaking). That scene left me cold and unmoved. I flail again because it was a cold scene between two actors who played it cold. See Pride and Prejudice if you want to see Keira Knightly getting hot and bothered with something. The sexual tension in that movie had me squeeing. This. No chemstiry at all. She can do it. He can do it. They sure as hell didn't do it together.

[veronica_rich]

Gee, you think maybe it has something to do with Johnny feeling like "Father Time with a pretty young girl" in his island scene with Keira? (Taken directly from movie commentary.) And they didn't even DO anything in that one. Even the best actor can only get past so much squick. It's true that Christina Ricci is only a few years older than Keira, but for some men, that could mean the difference between "OK, I don't mind kissing her" and "It's like frenching my daughter." (Yeah, yeah, age isn't supposed to matter in acting - BOLLOCKS. We all let personal shit interfere with our work sometimes.) I'm also pretty sure there's a large difference between being 22 years older than a 30-year-old and being 22 years older than a 19-year-old.

[pir8fancier]

You know, I've been thinking about this a lot and Johnny Depp is a great actor. I can only assume that the directors ASKED him to play this down. That this is only a vehicle for some angsty Will/Elizabeth scene down the road where true love finally triumphs. That she didn't mean to kiss him, that she only kissed him to lash him to the ship. Really clumsy storytelling and a rather infantile plot device (among MANY). I honestly believe that if Johnny Depp was told to make that scene hot, they would have had medics standing the aisles of the movie theaters from all the fangirls having heat stroke. I think it's more lameass directing in a lameass movie.

[veronica_rich]

I am, for the record, so vehemently anti-canon-J/E that Verbinski could have had them fucking on the deck, convincingly, and I would've glared at the screen, not getting anything vicarious from it at all. Which is odd, because I can usually handle *any* 'ship. But you can see I have an extra coldness toward that scene beyond your observation that while she was giving his tonsils a good sucking, Jack was clearly giving the kiss only minimal participation.

Still ... I'm not sure that should matter. If they're both hot, shouldn't the resulting kiss set fire to the screen no matter how little effort is going into it? Do you have any doubt that any mouth kiss, no matter how chaste or minimal, between Jack and Will would be anything less than heatwave-inducing? ;-)

[scifiroots]

Oh the anti-J/E ness. ^_~ I just don't see it, so I'm in with you two. I can certainly see Lizzie's attraction to Jack, but it would be infactuation, a crush that if ever realized would be incredibly disappointing. Jack may enjoy the attention, but would never contemplate a serious relationship.

[veronica_rich]

Elizabeth seems to waver between a realistic and a romantic view of Jack. Add to that she's used to being the center of attention - just as Jack is - and you have a recipe for dating disaster. Except for Will at first trying to talk Jack out of his compass, he seems to have a fairly realistic view of Jack and his trustworthiness (or lack thereof), and Will is definitely used to being on the sideline. This doesn't mean he'd be a Sub, it just means he's not constantly fighting Elizabeth (or Jack) for center stage.

[scifiroots]

This doesn't mean he'd be a Sub, it just means he's not constantly fighting Elizabeth (or Jack) for center stage.

Geehee. =D Poor William... ^_~ But heck, being on the sidelines rather works for him since he can then jump out unexpectedly to surprise his opponents. I have to say I like that about him and I appreciated that in DMC we got to see his more adventurous side and great strength.