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Parents can really be annoying. Let me tell you why. Until today, I didn't know how innocent I really was. Then I had a chat with my mom. Before I go into any detail, let me say that I'm the scorekeeper for field hockey, if you didn't already know. I am because 1. It was advertised in the morning bulletin, and this prompted me to 2. impulsivley volunteer for it when it came up during a chat with Mr. Miller. Anyway, I think the sport of Field Hockey's pretty cool. I mean I think that it's fun to watch, and scorekeeping is just a part of that, really. And its really a lot more intense than you might think. But now I'm straying off topic. The point is, my reasons for being the scorekeeper for Field Hockey are entirley different from my mother's reasons. Which are 1. not hers to have, and 2. totally untrue. they are as follows:
- I am a teenage boy, therefore I am horny and am desperate for action.
- I am obsessed with one girl on the team in particular, and am obsessed with banging her.
- I'm perverted, therefore seeing a sports bra will make me harder than Michael Jackson at Preschool.
So our views on stuff are different. In fact, I DON'T posess those "traits" listed above. I really don't. I mean first of all, I don't WANT to have sex, I'm not even considering it, not now. I'm not OBSESSED with one girl on the team, but I do like her. But I can't tell you enough that she's not why I'm the score keeper. She really isn't. That's a perk, but not the whole reason.
I also can't understand what's with everyone and breasts. Parents, and all. They're not even very useful, until you have a baby. I mean they're just these things protruding from your chest that basically say you're a woman. So I don't understand why my mom thinks that I LUST them or something. Or sports bras, for that matter. I don't CARE about them, not more than I care about your arm or something. I mean in this day and age, breasts are portrayed as sexual things, but they're not designed like that. Just to feed your kids. OH SNAP I have nipples, but that doesn't mean I get a goddamn orgasm whenver I see them. SPEAKING OF WHICH!
I also make friends with girls a lot easier than with guys. This is why:
HrnyBastrd4SHO: ============D~~~~~ HAHA I CUMMED ON UR MOM!!!1
SEX4MEPLZ696969: LOLOLOLZZZ!!!!11 (. ) ( .) HAHAHAAHAHAHA BOOBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111
HrnyBastrd4SHO: LOL IM HORNY!
SEX4MEPLZ696969: EW TMI R U GAY U FAG DONT TALK 2 ME AGAIN
*Shudder* *Shudder*. Ick. It's a common trend among guys. It really is. And they tend to be like SIMPLER than girls, you know, and don't make for very good talking. Or relationships, for that matter. Plus they're mean. And it's just EASIER for me to be around girls, I dunno, I connect with them more. You, that is, seeing as girls are basically this whole journal's audience. See, it's even manifested THERE. And my dad was the same way. But my mom just doesn't see that. Oh well, that's her goddamn problem, I'm really getting fed up with her feministic ways. The ones that are stereotyping men as horny bastards who don't care about women. The BAD type of feminist. That's what my mom is.
-Paul