Despite the fact that childhood seems carefree when we look back at it from this point in our lives, it never really was carefree. Do you remember how cruel everyone was in elementary school and middle school? Did the "popular kids" ever make you cry? When I was in elementary school, everything made me worry and I wanted to be anything but who I was. I had a suicidal older brother and the best friends I had were books. In middle school I wanted everything to be less dramatic and I wanted to be invisible, while at the same time wanting to be popular and in the inner circle, one of the people who controlled the drama. At times I simply hated myself for the way I acted while trying to achieve these things. I love being at the maturity level I am now because I have the ability to know myself; to know what is important to me; to set myself away from all the drama that people invent for themselves and try to pull me into. I can make real friendships with people, not just friendships that exist because of living on the same street or being less "cool" than everyone else. I now love that I love books and music and being alone and looking extra hard at things and thinking extra hard about things. My life and my self are now much, much better than they ever were in the past 15 years. I don't think I could have gotten here without giving up a little bit of innocence. I've tried drugs and realized they're not for me. I have a relationship with someone I care about so much that I'll be happy not to have sex for years. It's a good place to be. You're lucky that you can get to that place without giving up your innocence. I went about it the hard way.
It's true, though. If I'd had the ideal childhood, I would want it back. But I didn't. There are some things I wouldn't mind having back, like the lower level of academic stress and the ability to get sucked in by simple games and toys. My imagination was better then.
Also, I know that your point was not against maturity. I think that you should get a lot of respect from everyone for not wanting to smoke pot or have sex. (If only people were more mature, eh?)
Despite the fact that childhood seems carefree when we look back at it from this point in our lives, it never really was carefree. Do you remember how cruel everyone was in elementary school and middle school? Did the "popular kids" ever make you cry? When I was in elementary school, everything made me worry and I wanted to be anything but who I was. I had a suicidal older brother and the best friends I had were books. In middle school I wanted everything to be less dramatic and I wanted to be invisible, while at the same time wanting to be popular and in the inner circle, one of the people who controlled the drama. At times I simply hated myself for the way I acted while trying to achieve these things.
I love being at the maturity level I am now because I have the ability to know myself; to know what is important to me; to set myself away from all the drama that people invent for themselves and try to pull me into. I can make real friendships with people, not just friendships that exist because of living on the same street or being less "cool" than everyone else. I now love that I love books and music and being alone and looking extra hard at things and thinking extra hard about things. My life and my self are now much, much better than they ever were in the past 15 years. I don't think I could have gotten here without giving up a little bit of innocence. I've tried drugs and realized they're not for me. I have a relationship with someone I care about so much that I'll be happy not to have sex for years. It's a good place to be. You're lucky that you can get to that place without giving up your innocence. I went about it the hard way.
It's true, though. If I'd had the ideal childhood, I would want it back. But I didn't. There are some things I wouldn't mind having back, like the lower level of academic stress and the ability to get sucked in by simple games and toys. My imagination was better then.
Also, I know that your point was not against maturity. I think that you should get a lot of respect from everyone for not wanting to smoke pot or have sex. (If only people were more mature, eh?)
< /super long comment >
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