Let Me Dirty Up Your Mind...
I should be doing laundry right now, as I have no clean clothes for work tomorrow (today, for the rest of the world)... but ah, fuck it. I'll make some sort of attempt at getting up at a halfway decent hour in the morning. ...Yeah, right. Oh, as if anybody but me cares, I decided to go ahead and get a paid account- only for two months, though, so that way if I don’t like it… I’ve only wasted five bucks, you know? Although I did waste a considerable amount of time today fucking around with my color scheme and whatnot, since every time I played with it I either didn't like the design or the colors hurt my eyes or SOMETHING. So finally we have something that all parts of my brain can agree on. Yay.
I think my brain is conspiring against me. Or maybe just Harry Potter slash writers. Why, oh why do all the good slash writers have to be Harry/Draco? (okay, not all, just most of them) I'm really starting to like the pairing despite myself, and I really, really hate that. On that note: I found some absoutely delicious H/D stuff written by one pir8fancier , so if you're into that or at least open to it, go check it out. Gorgeous. Particularly "Let's Just Pretend the War Is Over", which is sad and hysterical and just beautifully written.
I was just listening to “Somebody’s Watching Over Me” by Hilary Duff (shut up, it’s a good song) and had a horrific thought: If our loved ones who have passed are, in fact, keeping an eye on us… that’s a scary idea. I mean… what my grandmother must think of me! What she must think of my virtual standstill, being too afraid to do anything and doing absolutely nothing with my life. And the thing that really gets me about this is that my grandmother was and still is one of the few people that I’m terrified of disappointing. I’m almost in tears just thinking about this, because honestly, she must be SO disappointed in everything I’m doing and everything I’ve become. It’s funny that I’ve listened to the song how many times before, and that never even occurred to me until just now. I need to go… do something. Anything.
(It's completely horrible that I just started three paragraphs in a row with the word "I", and it's completely against The Writer's Guide To Good Writing and All That Shit, but I'm too lazy to fix it. So there.)