Provenance (3/?)
God sorry this update has taken so long. Real Life has kinda been getting in the way recently.
Anyway...hope I havent driven people off with the wait!
Chapter 2
Mike whimpers as a semi rolls past rattling the windows and the door. The flickering lights from the broken motel sign cast a red, harsh shadow across his face and Harvey sees the frown flickers across his brow. He wants to wake him, gently with kisses and soft touches, to fuck Mike into wakefulness like he used to, have Mike’s eyes fly open when Harvey pushes in. Mike shifts, flings his arm across his eyes, mutters something that sounds like “no” and stills for a second.
Things certainly would be less complicated without Mike here, simpler, because Mike clouds Harvey’s mind, he always has, makes him second guess himself, hesitate when he should just pull the trigger. John knew it, watched with a sideways glance every time they worked together, and part of Harvey wondered if John knew what went on when John wasn’t around, in the darkness of another motel room, hands on skin and Harvey’s dick inside Mike’s willing body. Did John know his boys were fucking each other most of the night, Harvey’s hand over Mike’s mouth to keep him quiet.
However less complicated things would be, Harvey wouldn’t have it any other way. Mike’s back where he belongs, with Harvey. It’s the only way Harvey can be sure the kid’s safe and he’s not going to go astray. Harvey feels like he’s been watching out for that ever since John told him about the other kids.
Mike whimpers again, sighs out a quiet “Harvey” and Harvey allows himself to smile briefly. But then Mike’s face shifts to scared and the noise he makes is enough to have Harvey on his feet and running his fingers down Mike’s face, down to his chest, over his thudding heart.
“Shhh,” he mutters, “it’s ok, kid,” Mike frowns, his eyes fluttering against the nightmare and wanting to wake, but he jerks away from Harvey’s touch, and scrabbles against Harvey’s strong hand on his chest, fingernails scraping against Harvey’s skin. “Mike.”
Mike sits bolt upright, gasping and clutching at Harvey’s wrist still on his chest.
“Shit,” he breathes heavily for a few seconds.
“You ok?”
“Peachy,” he replies, letting go of Harvey’s wrist, his fingers slide off Harvey’s skin and Harvey hopes he cant feel the thudding of his pulse.
Mike’s face is close when he turns to look at Harvey, a haunted, almost scared look in them, but he blinks and its gone. He licks his lips and seems to notice their proximity. He shifts closer, “Harvey,” whispered, falls from his mouth.
Harvey can’t help it, he really can’t, he’s practically powerless when it comes to Mike anyway, but Mike wanting, scared and needy? Harvey’s a sucker. Mike’s mouth is hot, urgent as he kisses Harvey, fingers tangling in Harvey’s t-shirt, tugging him closer, tongue sweeping across the inside of Harvey’s mouth and he groans, tugs them both backwards. Harvey braces his hands either side of Mike’s head, presses his hips down and Mike arches upwards, fingers tangling in the hair at the back of Harvey’s neck. Harvey can feel Mike’s dick pressing against his own and its enough to bringing him back to reality when Mike tears his mouth away and slides it along Harvey’s jaw.
“No,” Mike nips at the skin, faint stubble catching and Harvey shudders, “Mike…stop.” Mike shudders too, but stops.
“Don’t…” his voice is quiet, desperate, “don’t use that tone on me,” he lets Harvey go, shuts his eyes and turns his head away and Harvey can see the effort it takes to get him to stop. Harvey crawls off him, sits on the side of the bed and runs his hands across his face. “I just…” Mike starts, hand over his eyes, he swallows, “I just don’t know how to be…around you without wanting you…”
“Mike,” Mike’s fingers curl around Harvey’s wrist, he tugs gently and Harvey turns towards him.
“It’s always been that way. I spent four years wanting you to walk around the next corner, four years waiting for you to come get me, to tell me I’d been an idiot,” Mike’s voice is rising with insistence and Harvey pulls his hand out of his grasp and stands.
“You walked out Mike, you. How was I meant to know you want me to come after you?” Mike sits, crosses his legs under him.
“Because you know me,” he flings back at Harvey and Harvey frowns, feels a coil of anger in his belly.
“I knew you. The Mike I thought I knew would never have walked out on his family,” he says and Mike looks like he’s been hit. He pushes himself off the bed and takes a step towards Harvey.
“I didn’t walk out on you Harvey, I told you that,” he snaps and Harvey scoffs.
“It’s not you, it’s me? Really Mike? You expected me to believe that?”
“Why wouldn’t you?” Mike asks and Harvey feels like punching him.
“Because you left me, Mike,” he shouts and Mike takes a step back, “me. You left me, after everything,” Harvey drives his fist into the wall, feels the satisfying pain shoot up his arm, “you pushed, and then you left,” Harvey hasn’t been this angry for a while, not since John told him about the kids, all the others through out history, born on the same date as Mike, and John had told Harvey they might one day have to kill Mike, to protect them and everyone else.
That had been the only time Harvey had raised a hand to his father.
“Harvey.”
“I’m leaving now,” Harvey says and Mike flinches, makes a move towards Harvey, hands out and Harvey sidesteps, “I’m coming back I just…” he trails off and Mike looks like he wants to argue, his jaw muscles quiver, but he doesn’t say anything and Harvey pulls the door open and slams it shut.
…
There’s a certain peace Harvey finds when he drives, the wheel beneath his hand, the smooth tarmac under the tyres, the way the road seems to roll under the car. He squeezes his hands around the wheel, resists the urge to close his eyes and just feel.
Four years is a long time to try to get over someone, its also too short a time to try to get over some who’s so inextricably linked to your every memory, someone who shaped who you are now just by being in your life. And then that person comes back into your life? Harvey feels himself slipping, being pulled back towards Mike like some laws of physics are at work.
He knows Mike feels it too, but Mike managed, for four years, to have some semblance of a normal life, to forget about Harvey and John and their jobs, all he’d been taught, to love someone else and that’s the crux of the problem. Harvey has spent the last four years going from bed to bed, imagining skinny, yet defined muscles, blonde messy hair and blue knowing eyes, whipcord body all angles instead of soft curves and plump breasts. Where as Mike had spent the last four years in the same bed. If Harvey were to think about it logically, they both went for completely the opposite of each other, to try to erase the memories rather than keep them alive. But he just feels the hurt, the pain and anger.
He almost wishes John was here, he’d take the complications away, if they can’t touch each other then none of this happens. Plus Harvey feels the ever knowing worry at the base of his spine whenever he thinks of John.
He pulls the car into the parking lot of the motel and Mike is sitting on the low wall outside the room, kicking his feet against the wall. He looks small and lost and Harvey has to quell the urge to go to him and pull him close. He turns the engine off, hears the familiar clunk as it stops and slowly gets out, closing the door as Mike slips off the wall.
“I’m sorry,” he says as Harvey gets closer and Harvey nods absently. Mike’s hand snakes out, wraps around Harvey’s wrist, his thumb brushes over Harvey’s knuckles, “for leaving, for letting you think that I didn’t care, that I didn’t…”
“Mike, stop, ok? Just, please,” Harvey tugs his wrist and Mike’s fingers slide across his pulse.
“Ok,” he says and digs into his pocket for his cell phone, he clears his throat and Harvey raises an eyebrow, “I got a call when you were…driving, from an old friend. I think he needs our help.”
…
“Really Mike I don’t think this sounds like our problem,” Harvey shoves his clothes into his bag and Mike sighs for the fifteenth time since he’s explained the problem to Harvey.
“I know Trevor, I know he’s not capable of what they’re saying he’s done,” he says and Harvey frowns at the way Mike stresses “know”.
“Still doesn’t mean its out problem,” there’s an air of awkwardness around them but they’ve agreed to put a lid on whatever issues they’re carrying around for the moment. Mike grits his teeth.
“They’re my friends, Harvey,” he sighs, like that’s meant to mean something to Harvey when the only people Harvey would drop anything for are Mike and John, “plus you’ll love New York,” Mike grins and Harvey rolls his eyes.
“Fine,” he sulks and Mike’s arm twitches like he wants to punch the air, “we’ll check it out,” Mike’s arms reach around Harvey’s back and he rests his head against his shoulders briefly, muttering ‘thanks’ into Harvey’s t-shirt and letting him go, “But if we find nothing I get a free pass to get stinking drunk and sleep with whoever I want,” Harvey says and Mike stiffens briefly, hand pausing mid shove of t-shirt into bag but then he nods.
“Since when have you needed my permission anyway?” he says and Harvey forces a laugh.
“Good point.”
…
Mike’s more than a little tense when he comes out from seeing Trevor, having bluffed their way in with Harvey’s fake ID’s. He’s kept Mike’s all these years in the glove box and Mike raises an eyebrow as he runs his fingers over them. But Mike’s face is taught, lined with worry and something else and Harvey feels jealousy over the part of Mike’s life he doesn’t know coil in his stomach.
“It wasn’t him,” Mike says around a mouthful of cheeseburger at the diner down the road from the police station. Harvey wrinkles his nose but sips at his coffee, contemplates pulling out his hipflask and lacing it with whiskey but decides it probably too early for that and he hates the look of disappointment from Mike whenever he does it.
“Swallow first,” he says and Mike sticks his tongue out but swallows.
“He didn’t do it,” he says again and Harvey leans forward.
“What exactly are they saying he’s done?”
“Killed a girl…” he says, shifting and Harvey raises an eyebrow, “tortured her,” he finished quietly.
“And you know he didn’t…how exactly?”
“Because I know him,” Mike says fiercely and Harvey sits back, runs his fingers around the rim of his coffee mug, Mike watches the movement and licks his bottom lip, lifts his gaze from Harvey’s and blushes slightly along his cheekbones.
“Know him? Or know him?” Mike’s nostrils twitch in anger, his knuckles turn white around his own mug.
“Not that its any of your business,” he mutters and Harvey reaches out, curls his fingers tight around Mike’s wrist. Mike’s grip on his mug relaxes as Harvey’s thumb presses into the soft skin on the inside, feels the pulse thud under the skin.
“I think it is my business,” he says low and quiet and Mike’s breath catches in his throat. He tugs on his arm sharply and Harvey lets go.
“He’s a friend. He didn’t do it Harvey,” Mike looks so sure, sounds so positive that Harvey can only sit back and sigh.
“Ok, say he didn’t do it, then why is he banged up like a criminal?” Harvey asks, then drains his coffee and signals at the waitress who sashays over with a smile that Harvey would usually pay attention to. Expect Mike’s sitting right in front of him and even though they have this “don’t touch” policy that they both keep breaking, he can’t seem to drag his eyes away from Mike.
“Because his prints were all over the scene,” the waitress fills Harvey’s mug and pauses for a second before realising she’s not getting anywhere and slinks off with a shrug, “Look, I know what it looks like ok?” Mike says like a teenager caught with gay porn and a stash of pot. Harvey snorts.
“Well good, cos it looks like your friend flipped out and went postal on some poor girl for no reason,” Mike runs his hand through his hair, sighs heavily.
“He wasn’t even there,” he says, looking down at his hands, “he was with his sister that night, but the police think she’s lying to protect him,” he looks up at Harvey, big blue pleading eyes and its so unfair that he still has this hold over Harvey, still uses that look to get Harvey to do things he doesn’t want to. Harvey sighs, internally he’s given up his argument but he needs to keep up the pretence at least a little longer.
“His fingerprints Mike,” he says.
“I…” Mike starts, shuts his mouth and shakes his head slightly. “What can I say to convince you to at least take a look at this?”
“I am taking a look,” Harvey says and Mike shifts, sits a little straighter, “and deciding it’s not our problem,” Mike deflates again but then his jaw muscles clench and he looks hard at Harvey.
It’s my problem, Harvey,” he says and with those four words Harvey knows that him and Trevor were more than just friends, no matter how many times Mike denies it, there is something else under this that makes Harvey want to leave the guy to rot in jail for the rest of his life, if only because he had the audacity to touch what was Harvey’s.
“No its not, not anymore,” he says and Mike gives him that look he used to give whenever Harvey was being overbearing. “You don’t have friends now Mike, you can’t, you know that,” he says and Mike narrows his eyes as Harvey pulls his wallet out of his pocket and throws a couple of bills onto the table, he groans quietly at the lack of cash in his wallet and makes a mental note to pull some credit card frauds in the not too distance future.
“So I’m meant to just leave them all behind?” Mike asks and Harvey stands, stretches out his stiff limbs, they drove all night but Harvey was damned if he was going to let Mike drive, “for you?” Mike spits and Harvey drops his arms to his sides and hooks his fingers under Mike’s chin, tilts his head up.
“I used to be enough for you,” he says and Mike swallows, eyes sliding shut like they used to, when Mike would submit and melt into Harvey’s touch. Harvey lets him go and Mike sways on his seat slightly.
“Harvey…”
“Find me something real and I’ll consider looking into it, otherwise we’re leaving tomorrow,” he snaps, his fingers tingling from touching Mike. He walks to the door.
“Where are you going?” Mike calls out and Harvey doesn’t even turn.
“To get drunk.”
…
The whiskey burns as it goes down, but its smooth, an expensive brand, Harvey felt like splurging. He sighs and signals for another and as the bartender fills his glass he feels the air around him change as someone sits into the stool next to him. Harvey glances to his right and there’s a shock of dark curly hair and a dangerous grin.
“Rough day?” he kid, because he’s a kid, no older than Mike, asks and Harvey raises an eyebrow.
“Seriously? You’re starting with that?” he asks and the kid grins again, flashes dimples that have heat pooling in Harvey’s stomach.
“No, I’m starting with my outstanding good looks, the words are meaningless,” the kid says and takes a pull of the bottle the bar tender slides in front of him. His lips wrap around the bottle and he keeps his green eyes fixed on Harvey’s. He’s got skill, Harvey thinks, throwing back his whiskey, his vision swims for a second and the kid lowers the bottle from his mouth, swipes a thumb over his lower lip and pulls it into his mouth.
“Subtle,” Harvey says and the kid grins.
“You don’t strike me as the subtle type,” he says, spins on his stool and faces Harvey, “Kyle.”
“Harvey,” Harvey clasps his hand briefly.
“What are you doing in New York, Harvey?” Kyle asks and Harvey raises an eyebrow, takes another swig from his bottle.
“What makes you think I don’t live here?”
“Please, I can spot a New Yorker from miles away. And you,” he points the top of his bottle in Harvey’s direction, “my friend, are not a New Yorker. So…what are doing here?”
“Figuring some stuff out,” Harvey replies, nodding at the bartender.
“What say we…get out of here and go figure stuff out together?” Kyle asks and Harvey’s almost taken aback buy the kids bluntness. He lets out a small laugh, downs his latest whiskey and digs into his pocket. Kyle’s hand lands on his arm.
“Let me, if you’re as good as you look, I think I may owe you these,” he says and Harvey laughs again as Kyle pays.
“Kid,” Harvey says, winding his fingers into Kyle’s waistband and tugging him close, “I’m better than I look.”
…
Kyle’s got his hand down Harvey’s pants before Harvey can even shut the motel room door, he’s groaning into Harvey’s mouth, fingers curling around Harvey’s dick and Harvey spins them, pushing Kyle up against the door and drags his fingers through the messy curls, tugs Kyle’s head to the side and licks up his throat.
“Fuck,” Kyle mutters and Harvey huffs out a laugh against his skin.
“If you insist,” he pulls Kyle off the door, spins him around and pushes, hard. Kyle lands on the bed with an indignant noise but then smirks up at Harvey, dimples creasing his cheeks. He’d look cute if it wasn’t for the hungry look in his eyes.
Kyle opens his mouth to say something but Harvey doesn’t want to talk, so he covers Kyle’s mouth with his own, covering Kyle’s body at the same time, pressing his hips down. Kyle groans, runs his hands through Harvey’s hair and wraps a leg around him, pulls their dicks together and the slide of denim against his dick is almost painful. But it’s a good pain and Harvey presses down again, manages to get a hand under Kyle’s shirt and runs his hand up his skins, fingers skating over ribs, thumb brushing over a nipple. Kyle shudders, tears his mouth away and nips at Harvey’s jaw. His teeth drag along the shadow of stubble there and Harvey groans, pulls away to dig into his pocket for the small sachet of lube and a condom he always carries. Kyle raises an eyebrow.
“Such a boy scout,” he says, voice more than a little wrecked and Harvey grins his shark like grin and pulls his t-shirt over his head. Kyle shifts, tugs his own shirt off and Harvey briefly wonders where Mike is. Kyle cups Harvey’s dick through his jeans and Mike goes out of his head.
The smug smirk goes off Kyle’s face as Harvey tugs his jeans and his boxers down in one go and curls his fingers around Kyle’s dick, runs his thumb over the slit. Kyle bucks up into his hand, bottom lip caught between his teeth. There’s a few curls lying across his forehead, already plastered to the skin with a light sheen of sweat and Kyle arches his whole body as Harvey runs his other hand down his chest. He slides it back up and pushes two fingers into Kyle’s mouth. Kyle groans again, wraps his tongue around them, licks between them.
“Get them good and wet,” Harvey murmurs and Kyle opens his eyes, stares as Harvey as he sucks on his fingers. Harvey pulls his fingers out, lifts one of Kyle’s thighs and presses one of the wet digits to Kyle’s hole, Kyle pushes his hips down and Harvey’s finger sinks in to the knuckle.
“More,” Kyle breathes out and Harvey presses another finger in, spreads them gently. Kyle moans, plants his feet against the mattress and starts fucking himself on Harvey’s fingers and its one of the hottest things Harvey’s seen in a long time. He adds a third finger and Kyle lets out a noise like he’s dying, arches his back and lifts his hand to his dick. Harvey swats it away.
“No,” he mutters and pulls his fingers out, rips open the condom wrapper, slides it over his dick. Kyle’s shuddering, looking at Harvey with pleading eyes, as Harvey pours lube onto his hand, slicks his dick up and spreads the rest over Kyle’s ass. Then he’s lifting Kyle’s legs and pushing inside, all the way in, in one smooth movement.
They both groan, Kyle’s fingers digging into Harvey’s biceps and Harvey wondering why he hadn’t had sex with a man for so long. Its different, its easier to let go and fuck a man into the mattress, to be as rough as he wanted without risking hurting the other person. But then Mike’s blue eyes come back into his head, and Mike’s the reason Harvey hasn’t done this for a while, because it’s always Mike he’s fucking into the mattress. Kyle urges him on with groans, whines, a hand pressed to Harvey’s lower back pulling him in closer until Harvey feels his orgasm coil in his stomach and he slows, wraps his hand around Kyle’s dick against and twists, runs a thumb nail over the tip and slides his hand back down and Kyle comes, with a shout, nails scratching down Harvey’s back as hot come spills over Harvey’s hand and onto Kyle’s stomach. Harvey doesn’t give him a chance to catch his breath, fucks him hard until Kyle clenches around him and Harvey comes hard, the alcohol in his system making his blood pound and his vision swim again.
“Ok,” Kyle says when Harvey collapses onto him, head pressed to Kyle’s shoulder, “I’ll give you that. You are better than you look, and you look good,” Harvey huffs out a laugh as Kyle trails a hand down his spine. Harvey moves off him, pulls out of Kyle’s body with a small wince from Kyle and dumps the condom into the trash, makes a mental note to clear it before Mike gets back.
“I look great,” Harvey says pulling his jeans on and Kyle raises an eyebrow as he stretches on the bed.
“Hmm,” he hums, eyes raking up and down Harvey’s body and then he moves, sits and Harvey throws his jeans in his direction. Kyle grins and pulls them on without standing, shimmies into them without taking his eyes off Harvey. Harvey hauls him to his feet and kisses him hard, his hand sliding back along Kyle’s jaw, digging into his hair. Kyle pulls away and grabs his t-shirt. He’s got his head halfway into it and Harvey’s hands around his hips when the door flings open.
“Harvey I found…” Mike’s voice trails off and he stares at them both. Kyle pulls his head through, a little flustered looking and has the gall to grin at Mike.
“Shit,” Harvey murmurs to himself and Mike’s face is doing that irritatingly blank thing again.
“Awkward,” Kyle singsongs and Harvey snorts. Mike just narrows his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest. “Right…that’s my cue,” Kyle trails a hand over Harvey’s bare chest, doesn’t offer his number, doesn’t ask for Harvey’s, grins once more and is out of the door before Harvey can think.
“Get drunk, huh?” Mike snaps as he slams the door shut.
“What?” Harvey thinks about putting a shirt on, decides against his when Mike’s gaze flicks down to the bite mark on his chest.
“You…”
“Go on Mike, insult me. It will make it that much easier for me to be pissed at you right now,” Harvey snaps and Mike takes a step back.
“Why the hell are you pissed at me?” Mike demands, his eyes keep flicking down to Harvey’s chest and Harvey takes a step forward, lowers his voice slightly and pulls Mike close, slides his fingers down Mike’s jaw.
“You have no idea what it’s like to see you with someone else,” he says and Mike flinches, pushes Harvey away with a hard shove against his chest.
“I think I do right now,” he scoffs and Harvey lets out a cruel laugh.
“Kyle? That was a meaningless fuck because I am so tired of trying to keep my hands off you. You were in love with Jen, Mike. You made a life with her. And you fucked Trevor, probably more than once and here we are, helping him, because you cant let go,” he shouts and Mike glares.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Mike shouts back.
“Yes I do, I know you, remember? You don’t let go easily,” Harvey says, managing to control his volume, “Apart from me, apparently you can let go of me just fine,” Mike sighs, runs a hand through his hair. It shakes slightly.
“God,” he sounds exasperated, “when did you become so…” he trails off, heading towards the door, “I can’t talk to you like this…” he pulls the door open and throws one last hateful look at Harvey, “sober up,” he snaps and slams the door so hard behind him that the occupants from the next door room bang on the wall. Harvey drives his fist into once in retaliation.
“Fuck.”
Chapter 4
Anyway...hope I havent driven people off with the wait!
Chapter 2
Mike whimpers as a semi rolls past rattling the windows and the door. The flickering lights from the broken motel sign cast a red, harsh shadow across his face and Harvey sees the frown flickers across his brow. He wants to wake him, gently with kisses and soft touches, to fuck Mike into wakefulness like he used to, have Mike’s eyes fly open when Harvey pushes in. Mike shifts, flings his arm across his eyes, mutters something that sounds like “no” and stills for a second.
Things certainly would be less complicated without Mike here, simpler, because Mike clouds Harvey’s mind, he always has, makes him second guess himself, hesitate when he should just pull the trigger. John knew it, watched with a sideways glance every time they worked together, and part of Harvey wondered if John knew what went on when John wasn’t around, in the darkness of another motel room, hands on skin and Harvey’s dick inside Mike’s willing body. Did John know his boys were fucking each other most of the night, Harvey’s hand over Mike’s mouth to keep him quiet.
However less complicated things would be, Harvey wouldn’t have it any other way. Mike’s back where he belongs, with Harvey. It’s the only way Harvey can be sure the kid’s safe and he’s not going to go astray. Harvey feels like he’s been watching out for that ever since John told him about the other kids.
Mike whimpers again, sighs out a quiet “Harvey” and Harvey allows himself to smile briefly. But then Mike’s face shifts to scared and the noise he makes is enough to have Harvey on his feet and running his fingers down Mike’s face, down to his chest, over his thudding heart.
“Shhh,” he mutters, “it’s ok, kid,” Mike frowns, his eyes fluttering against the nightmare and wanting to wake, but he jerks away from Harvey’s touch, and scrabbles against Harvey’s strong hand on his chest, fingernails scraping against Harvey’s skin. “Mike.”
Mike sits bolt upright, gasping and clutching at Harvey’s wrist still on his chest.
“Shit,” he breathes heavily for a few seconds.
“You ok?”
“Peachy,” he replies, letting go of Harvey’s wrist, his fingers slide off Harvey’s skin and Harvey hopes he cant feel the thudding of his pulse.
Mike’s face is close when he turns to look at Harvey, a haunted, almost scared look in them, but he blinks and its gone. He licks his lips and seems to notice their proximity. He shifts closer, “Harvey,” whispered, falls from his mouth.
Harvey can’t help it, he really can’t, he’s practically powerless when it comes to Mike anyway, but Mike wanting, scared and needy? Harvey’s a sucker. Mike’s mouth is hot, urgent as he kisses Harvey, fingers tangling in Harvey’s t-shirt, tugging him closer, tongue sweeping across the inside of Harvey’s mouth and he groans, tugs them both backwards. Harvey braces his hands either side of Mike’s head, presses his hips down and Mike arches upwards, fingers tangling in the hair at the back of Harvey’s neck. Harvey can feel Mike’s dick pressing against his own and its enough to bringing him back to reality when Mike tears his mouth away and slides it along Harvey’s jaw.
“No,” Mike nips at the skin, faint stubble catching and Harvey shudders, “Mike…stop.” Mike shudders too, but stops.
“Don’t…” his voice is quiet, desperate, “don’t use that tone on me,” he lets Harvey go, shuts his eyes and turns his head away and Harvey can see the effort it takes to get him to stop. Harvey crawls off him, sits on the side of the bed and runs his hands across his face. “I just…” Mike starts, hand over his eyes, he swallows, “I just don’t know how to be…around you without wanting you…”
“Mike,” Mike’s fingers curl around Harvey’s wrist, he tugs gently and Harvey turns towards him.
“It’s always been that way. I spent four years wanting you to walk around the next corner, four years waiting for you to come get me, to tell me I’d been an idiot,” Mike’s voice is rising with insistence and Harvey pulls his hand out of his grasp and stands.
“You walked out Mike, you. How was I meant to know you want me to come after you?” Mike sits, crosses his legs under him.
“Because you know me,” he flings back at Harvey and Harvey frowns, feels a coil of anger in his belly.
“I knew you. The Mike I thought I knew would never have walked out on his family,” he says and Mike looks like he’s been hit. He pushes himself off the bed and takes a step towards Harvey.
“I didn’t walk out on you Harvey, I told you that,” he snaps and Harvey scoffs.
“It’s not you, it’s me? Really Mike? You expected me to believe that?”
“Why wouldn’t you?” Mike asks and Harvey feels like punching him.
“Because you left me, Mike,” he shouts and Mike takes a step back, “me. You left me, after everything,” Harvey drives his fist into the wall, feels the satisfying pain shoot up his arm, “you pushed, and then you left,” Harvey hasn’t been this angry for a while, not since John told him about the kids, all the others through out history, born on the same date as Mike, and John had told Harvey they might one day have to kill Mike, to protect them and everyone else.
That had been the only time Harvey had raised a hand to his father.
“Harvey.”
“I’m leaving now,” Harvey says and Mike flinches, makes a move towards Harvey, hands out and Harvey sidesteps, “I’m coming back I just…” he trails off and Mike looks like he wants to argue, his jaw muscles quiver, but he doesn’t say anything and Harvey pulls the door open and slams it shut.
…
There’s a certain peace Harvey finds when he drives, the wheel beneath his hand, the smooth tarmac under the tyres, the way the road seems to roll under the car. He squeezes his hands around the wheel, resists the urge to close his eyes and just feel.
Four years is a long time to try to get over someone, its also too short a time to try to get over some who’s so inextricably linked to your every memory, someone who shaped who you are now just by being in your life. And then that person comes back into your life? Harvey feels himself slipping, being pulled back towards Mike like some laws of physics are at work.
He knows Mike feels it too, but Mike managed, for four years, to have some semblance of a normal life, to forget about Harvey and John and their jobs, all he’d been taught, to love someone else and that’s the crux of the problem. Harvey has spent the last four years going from bed to bed, imagining skinny, yet defined muscles, blonde messy hair and blue knowing eyes, whipcord body all angles instead of soft curves and plump breasts. Where as Mike had spent the last four years in the same bed. If Harvey were to think about it logically, they both went for completely the opposite of each other, to try to erase the memories rather than keep them alive. But he just feels the hurt, the pain and anger.
He almost wishes John was here, he’d take the complications away, if they can’t touch each other then none of this happens. Plus Harvey feels the ever knowing worry at the base of his spine whenever he thinks of John.
He pulls the car into the parking lot of the motel and Mike is sitting on the low wall outside the room, kicking his feet against the wall. He looks small and lost and Harvey has to quell the urge to go to him and pull him close. He turns the engine off, hears the familiar clunk as it stops and slowly gets out, closing the door as Mike slips off the wall.
“I’m sorry,” he says as Harvey gets closer and Harvey nods absently. Mike’s hand snakes out, wraps around Harvey’s wrist, his thumb brushes over Harvey’s knuckles, “for leaving, for letting you think that I didn’t care, that I didn’t…”
“Mike, stop, ok? Just, please,” Harvey tugs his wrist and Mike’s fingers slide across his pulse.
“Ok,” he says and digs into his pocket for his cell phone, he clears his throat and Harvey raises an eyebrow, “I got a call when you were…driving, from an old friend. I think he needs our help.”
…
“Really Mike I don’t think this sounds like our problem,” Harvey shoves his clothes into his bag and Mike sighs for the fifteenth time since he’s explained the problem to Harvey.
“I know Trevor, I know he’s not capable of what they’re saying he’s done,” he says and Harvey frowns at the way Mike stresses “know”.
“Still doesn’t mean its out problem,” there’s an air of awkwardness around them but they’ve agreed to put a lid on whatever issues they’re carrying around for the moment. Mike grits his teeth.
“They’re my friends, Harvey,” he sighs, like that’s meant to mean something to Harvey when the only people Harvey would drop anything for are Mike and John, “plus you’ll love New York,” Mike grins and Harvey rolls his eyes.
“Fine,” he sulks and Mike’s arm twitches like he wants to punch the air, “we’ll check it out,” Mike’s arms reach around Harvey’s back and he rests his head against his shoulders briefly, muttering ‘thanks’ into Harvey’s t-shirt and letting him go, “But if we find nothing I get a free pass to get stinking drunk and sleep with whoever I want,” Harvey says and Mike stiffens briefly, hand pausing mid shove of t-shirt into bag but then he nods.
“Since when have you needed my permission anyway?” he says and Harvey forces a laugh.
“Good point.”
…
Mike’s more than a little tense when he comes out from seeing Trevor, having bluffed their way in with Harvey’s fake ID’s. He’s kept Mike’s all these years in the glove box and Mike raises an eyebrow as he runs his fingers over them. But Mike’s face is taught, lined with worry and something else and Harvey feels jealousy over the part of Mike’s life he doesn’t know coil in his stomach.
“It wasn’t him,” Mike says around a mouthful of cheeseburger at the diner down the road from the police station. Harvey wrinkles his nose but sips at his coffee, contemplates pulling out his hipflask and lacing it with whiskey but decides it probably too early for that and he hates the look of disappointment from Mike whenever he does it.
“Swallow first,” he says and Mike sticks his tongue out but swallows.
“He didn’t do it,” he says again and Harvey leans forward.
“What exactly are they saying he’s done?”
“Killed a girl…” he says, shifting and Harvey raises an eyebrow, “tortured her,” he finished quietly.
“And you know he didn’t…how exactly?”
“Because I know him,” Mike says fiercely and Harvey sits back, runs his fingers around the rim of his coffee mug, Mike watches the movement and licks his bottom lip, lifts his gaze from Harvey’s and blushes slightly along his cheekbones.
“Know him? Or know him?” Mike’s nostrils twitch in anger, his knuckles turn white around his own mug.
“Not that its any of your business,” he mutters and Harvey reaches out, curls his fingers tight around Mike’s wrist. Mike’s grip on his mug relaxes as Harvey’s thumb presses into the soft skin on the inside, feels the pulse thud under the skin.
“I think it is my business,” he says low and quiet and Mike’s breath catches in his throat. He tugs on his arm sharply and Harvey lets go.
“He’s a friend. He didn’t do it Harvey,” Mike looks so sure, sounds so positive that Harvey can only sit back and sigh.
“Ok, say he didn’t do it, then why is he banged up like a criminal?” Harvey asks, then drains his coffee and signals at the waitress who sashays over with a smile that Harvey would usually pay attention to. Expect Mike’s sitting right in front of him and even though they have this “don’t touch” policy that they both keep breaking, he can’t seem to drag his eyes away from Mike.
“Because his prints were all over the scene,” the waitress fills Harvey’s mug and pauses for a second before realising she’s not getting anywhere and slinks off with a shrug, “Look, I know what it looks like ok?” Mike says like a teenager caught with gay porn and a stash of pot. Harvey snorts.
“Well good, cos it looks like your friend flipped out and went postal on some poor girl for no reason,” Mike runs his hand through his hair, sighs heavily.
“He wasn’t even there,” he says, looking down at his hands, “he was with his sister that night, but the police think she’s lying to protect him,” he looks up at Harvey, big blue pleading eyes and its so unfair that he still has this hold over Harvey, still uses that look to get Harvey to do things he doesn’t want to. Harvey sighs, internally he’s given up his argument but he needs to keep up the pretence at least a little longer.
“His fingerprints Mike,” he says.
“I…” Mike starts, shuts his mouth and shakes his head slightly. “What can I say to convince you to at least take a look at this?”
“I am taking a look,” Harvey says and Mike shifts, sits a little straighter, “and deciding it’s not our problem,” Mike deflates again but then his jaw muscles clench and he looks hard at Harvey.
It’s my problem, Harvey,” he says and with those four words Harvey knows that him and Trevor were more than just friends, no matter how many times Mike denies it, there is something else under this that makes Harvey want to leave the guy to rot in jail for the rest of his life, if only because he had the audacity to touch what was Harvey’s.
“No its not, not anymore,” he says and Mike gives him that look he used to give whenever Harvey was being overbearing. “You don’t have friends now Mike, you can’t, you know that,” he says and Mike narrows his eyes as Harvey pulls his wallet out of his pocket and throws a couple of bills onto the table, he groans quietly at the lack of cash in his wallet and makes a mental note to pull some credit card frauds in the not too distance future.
“So I’m meant to just leave them all behind?” Mike asks and Harvey stands, stretches out his stiff limbs, they drove all night but Harvey was damned if he was going to let Mike drive, “for you?” Mike spits and Harvey drops his arms to his sides and hooks his fingers under Mike’s chin, tilts his head up.
“I used to be enough for you,” he says and Mike swallows, eyes sliding shut like they used to, when Mike would submit and melt into Harvey’s touch. Harvey lets him go and Mike sways on his seat slightly.
“Harvey…”
“Find me something real and I’ll consider looking into it, otherwise we’re leaving tomorrow,” he snaps, his fingers tingling from touching Mike. He walks to the door.
“Where are you going?” Mike calls out and Harvey doesn’t even turn.
“To get drunk.”
…
The whiskey burns as it goes down, but its smooth, an expensive brand, Harvey felt like splurging. He sighs and signals for another and as the bartender fills his glass he feels the air around him change as someone sits into the stool next to him. Harvey glances to his right and there’s a shock of dark curly hair and a dangerous grin.
“Rough day?” he kid, because he’s a kid, no older than Mike, asks and Harvey raises an eyebrow.
“Seriously? You’re starting with that?” he asks and the kid grins again, flashes dimples that have heat pooling in Harvey’s stomach.
“No, I’m starting with my outstanding good looks, the words are meaningless,” the kid says and takes a pull of the bottle the bar tender slides in front of him. His lips wrap around the bottle and he keeps his green eyes fixed on Harvey’s. He’s got skill, Harvey thinks, throwing back his whiskey, his vision swims for a second and the kid lowers the bottle from his mouth, swipes a thumb over his lower lip and pulls it into his mouth.
“Subtle,” Harvey says and the kid grins.
“You don’t strike me as the subtle type,” he says, spins on his stool and faces Harvey, “Kyle.”
“Harvey,” Harvey clasps his hand briefly.
“What are you doing in New York, Harvey?” Kyle asks and Harvey raises an eyebrow, takes another swig from his bottle.
“What makes you think I don’t live here?”
“Please, I can spot a New Yorker from miles away. And you,” he points the top of his bottle in Harvey’s direction, “my friend, are not a New Yorker. So…what are doing here?”
“Figuring some stuff out,” Harvey replies, nodding at the bartender.
“What say we…get out of here and go figure stuff out together?” Kyle asks and Harvey’s almost taken aback buy the kids bluntness. He lets out a small laugh, downs his latest whiskey and digs into his pocket. Kyle’s hand lands on his arm.
“Let me, if you’re as good as you look, I think I may owe you these,” he says and Harvey laughs again as Kyle pays.
“Kid,” Harvey says, winding his fingers into Kyle’s waistband and tugging him close, “I’m better than I look.”
…
Kyle’s got his hand down Harvey’s pants before Harvey can even shut the motel room door, he’s groaning into Harvey’s mouth, fingers curling around Harvey’s dick and Harvey spins them, pushing Kyle up against the door and drags his fingers through the messy curls, tugs Kyle’s head to the side and licks up his throat.
“Fuck,” Kyle mutters and Harvey huffs out a laugh against his skin.
“If you insist,” he pulls Kyle off the door, spins him around and pushes, hard. Kyle lands on the bed with an indignant noise but then smirks up at Harvey, dimples creasing his cheeks. He’d look cute if it wasn’t for the hungry look in his eyes.
Kyle opens his mouth to say something but Harvey doesn’t want to talk, so he covers Kyle’s mouth with his own, covering Kyle’s body at the same time, pressing his hips down. Kyle groans, runs his hands through Harvey’s hair and wraps a leg around him, pulls their dicks together and the slide of denim against his dick is almost painful. But it’s a good pain and Harvey presses down again, manages to get a hand under Kyle’s shirt and runs his hand up his skins, fingers skating over ribs, thumb brushing over a nipple. Kyle shudders, tears his mouth away and nips at Harvey’s jaw. His teeth drag along the shadow of stubble there and Harvey groans, pulls away to dig into his pocket for the small sachet of lube and a condom he always carries. Kyle raises an eyebrow.
“Such a boy scout,” he says, voice more than a little wrecked and Harvey grins his shark like grin and pulls his t-shirt over his head. Kyle shifts, tugs his own shirt off and Harvey briefly wonders where Mike is. Kyle cups Harvey’s dick through his jeans and Mike goes out of his head.
The smug smirk goes off Kyle’s face as Harvey tugs his jeans and his boxers down in one go and curls his fingers around Kyle’s dick, runs his thumb over the slit. Kyle bucks up into his hand, bottom lip caught between his teeth. There’s a few curls lying across his forehead, already plastered to the skin with a light sheen of sweat and Kyle arches his whole body as Harvey runs his other hand down his chest. He slides it back up and pushes two fingers into Kyle’s mouth. Kyle groans again, wraps his tongue around them, licks between them.
“Get them good and wet,” Harvey murmurs and Kyle opens his eyes, stares as Harvey as he sucks on his fingers. Harvey pulls his fingers out, lifts one of Kyle’s thighs and presses one of the wet digits to Kyle’s hole, Kyle pushes his hips down and Harvey’s finger sinks in to the knuckle.
“More,” Kyle breathes out and Harvey presses another finger in, spreads them gently. Kyle moans, plants his feet against the mattress and starts fucking himself on Harvey’s fingers and its one of the hottest things Harvey’s seen in a long time. He adds a third finger and Kyle lets out a noise like he’s dying, arches his back and lifts his hand to his dick. Harvey swats it away.
“No,” he mutters and pulls his fingers out, rips open the condom wrapper, slides it over his dick. Kyle’s shuddering, looking at Harvey with pleading eyes, as Harvey pours lube onto his hand, slicks his dick up and spreads the rest over Kyle’s ass. Then he’s lifting Kyle’s legs and pushing inside, all the way in, in one smooth movement.
They both groan, Kyle’s fingers digging into Harvey’s biceps and Harvey wondering why he hadn’t had sex with a man for so long. Its different, its easier to let go and fuck a man into the mattress, to be as rough as he wanted without risking hurting the other person. But then Mike’s blue eyes come back into his head, and Mike’s the reason Harvey hasn’t done this for a while, because it’s always Mike he’s fucking into the mattress. Kyle urges him on with groans, whines, a hand pressed to Harvey’s lower back pulling him in closer until Harvey feels his orgasm coil in his stomach and he slows, wraps his hand around Kyle’s dick against and twists, runs a thumb nail over the tip and slides his hand back down and Kyle comes, with a shout, nails scratching down Harvey’s back as hot come spills over Harvey’s hand and onto Kyle’s stomach. Harvey doesn’t give him a chance to catch his breath, fucks him hard until Kyle clenches around him and Harvey comes hard, the alcohol in his system making his blood pound and his vision swim again.
“Ok,” Kyle says when Harvey collapses onto him, head pressed to Kyle’s shoulder, “I’ll give you that. You are better than you look, and you look good,” Harvey huffs out a laugh as Kyle trails a hand down his spine. Harvey moves off him, pulls out of Kyle’s body with a small wince from Kyle and dumps the condom into the trash, makes a mental note to clear it before Mike gets back.
“I look great,” Harvey says pulling his jeans on and Kyle raises an eyebrow as he stretches on the bed.
“Hmm,” he hums, eyes raking up and down Harvey’s body and then he moves, sits and Harvey throws his jeans in his direction. Kyle grins and pulls them on without standing, shimmies into them without taking his eyes off Harvey. Harvey hauls him to his feet and kisses him hard, his hand sliding back along Kyle’s jaw, digging into his hair. Kyle pulls away and grabs his t-shirt. He’s got his head halfway into it and Harvey’s hands around his hips when the door flings open.
“Harvey I found…” Mike’s voice trails off and he stares at them both. Kyle pulls his head through, a little flustered looking and has the gall to grin at Mike.
“Shit,” Harvey murmurs to himself and Mike’s face is doing that irritatingly blank thing again.
“Awkward,” Kyle singsongs and Harvey snorts. Mike just narrows his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest. “Right…that’s my cue,” Kyle trails a hand over Harvey’s bare chest, doesn’t offer his number, doesn’t ask for Harvey’s, grins once more and is out of the door before Harvey can think.
“Get drunk, huh?” Mike snaps as he slams the door shut.
“What?” Harvey thinks about putting a shirt on, decides against his when Mike’s gaze flicks down to the bite mark on his chest.
“You…”
“Go on Mike, insult me. It will make it that much easier for me to be pissed at you right now,” Harvey snaps and Mike takes a step back.
“Why the hell are you pissed at me?” Mike demands, his eyes keep flicking down to Harvey’s chest and Harvey takes a step forward, lowers his voice slightly and pulls Mike close, slides his fingers down Mike’s jaw.
“You have no idea what it’s like to see you with someone else,” he says and Mike flinches, pushes Harvey away with a hard shove against his chest.
“I think I do right now,” he scoffs and Harvey lets out a cruel laugh.
“Kyle? That was a meaningless fuck because I am so tired of trying to keep my hands off you. You were in love with Jen, Mike. You made a life with her. And you fucked Trevor, probably more than once and here we are, helping him, because you cant let go,” he shouts and Mike glares.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Mike shouts back.
“Yes I do, I know you, remember? You don’t let go easily,” Harvey says, managing to control his volume, “Apart from me, apparently you can let go of me just fine,” Mike sighs, runs a hand through his hair. It shakes slightly.
“God,” he sounds exasperated, “when did you become so…” he trails off, heading towards the door, “I can’t talk to you like this…” he pulls the door open and throws one last hateful look at Harvey, “sober up,” he snaps and slams the door so hard behind him that the occupants from the next door room bang on the wall. Harvey drives his fist into once in retaliation.
“Fuck.”
Chapter 4