Sigh.
Found the sports arc of the Ouran manga. Need to find translations/scanlations or something. I figure that will at least keep my attention. I dunno. I really liked what I saw of Tenipuri, so I figure Ouran as a sports manga might hold my interest more. Sports as war and all. And it looks like there's some interesting Kyouya and Tamaki dynamics going on there, what with the whole rivalry thing and Kyouya being extremely pissy. Yaaay, pissy Kyouya.
And feeling a bit better. x.x;;
Did my usual "I know! I'll call people, so that I stop being emo!" ... which usually results in no one picking up their phones. x.o; And yeah, that basically happened again. Sigh.
Then checked online, and no one seemed to be online anywhere, but I managed to snag Ry on Gmail while she was at the school computer lab, so wooo. After she got kicked out she called me, and we went on various dark parking lot adventures, which resulted in being attacked by giant grasshoppers and so forth. She collected some recycleables. We've decided we're going to go parking lot trash hunting sometime, just because we're probably the only people in the world who would find that entertaining. She found one of those red pencils people use to mark passages in Bibles. It was labelled as such.
Also gave me an outlet for my random anger, so now I once again feel the need to punch Omma. Wooo. Luckily I've never actually met the woman, so I have yet to actually do so. And generally, I'm much nicer in person than I am in thought. ... I guess that's as best as I can put that.
Put some vague effort into cleaning my room. Mostly, I moved a bunch of stuff to the guest room, which is going to get me murdered if mom notices, but oh well. I can't see what any of it is in here, so I figure moving it with all my college stuff is okay... I can see what it is in there, and then figure out where it needs to go once I start moving things BACK into my room... Although mom came home from work early, because I guess they're having her work tomorrow instead, so I'll have to save the rest of my moving to then. Sigh. I was hoping to get enough done tonight so that it wouldn't be noticeable.
Meh. I want to go out and meet people. Not that that'd help me any, because I wouldn't be able to get up the nerve to call any of them, and I'd still wind up calling the same five people and they'll all be too busy to talk to me, as usual. Need more family.
Still bored. Discussed with Ry my sudden urge to just change everything. Didn't go in-depth with how far my suddeny urge to just change everything actually goes. Just mentioned the whole wanting contacts/wanting to cut my hair/wanting to dye it weird colors or do SOMETHING with it that wont piss me off as much as it does now, and as much as the idea of cutting it back to how it normally is does.
I don't know. I want to make all these changes, and I know none of it will actually benefit me at all, and none of it will make me any happier, but I feel like I should at least TRY to escape this sudden ennui. But there's not really anything I can do about it, and the only things I can think of that would change anything are only going to put me in a worse situation overall, and get a lot of people pissed off at me. And I don't want to start drama, I just want things to be different.
Bleh. I'm being melodramatic again. x.o; But at least, for the time being, the temptation to just start calling people and saying things I'll regret is under control.
Maybe JB will call me tomorrow and we can do something. And maybe that'll help me figure out what the hell I'm thinking right now, because I honestly don't know anymore.
What's more likely is I'll just forget to think about it until I get home. And I guess that's fine too. I'm good at avoiding problems.
And feeling a bit better. x.x;;
Did my usual "I know! I'll call people, so that I stop being emo!" ... which usually results in no one picking up their phones. x.o; And yeah, that basically happened again. Sigh.
Then checked online, and no one seemed to be online anywhere, but I managed to snag Ry on Gmail while she was at the school computer lab, so wooo. After she got kicked out she called me, and we went on various dark parking lot adventures, which resulted in being attacked by giant grasshoppers and so forth. She collected some recycleables. We've decided we're going to go parking lot trash hunting sometime, just because we're probably the only people in the world who would find that entertaining. She found one of those red pencils people use to mark passages in Bibles. It was labelled as such.
Also gave me an outlet for my random anger, so now I once again feel the need to punch Omma. Wooo. Luckily I've never actually met the woman, so I have yet to actually do so. And generally, I'm much nicer in person than I am in thought. ... I guess that's as best as I can put that.
Put some vague effort into cleaning my room. Mostly, I moved a bunch of stuff to the guest room, which is going to get me murdered if mom notices, but oh well. I can't see what any of it is in here, so I figure moving it with all my college stuff is okay... I can see what it is in there, and then figure out where it needs to go once I start moving things BACK into my room... Although mom came home from work early, because I guess they're having her work tomorrow instead, so I'll have to save the rest of my moving to then. Sigh. I was hoping to get enough done tonight so that it wouldn't be noticeable.
Meh. I want to go out and meet people. Not that that'd help me any, because I wouldn't be able to get up the nerve to call any of them, and I'd still wind up calling the same five people and they'll all be too busy to talk to me, as usual. Need more family.
Still bored. Discussed with Ry my sudden urge to just change everything. Didn't go in-depth with how far my suddeny urge to just change everything actually goes. Just mentioned the whole wanting contacts/wanting to cut my hair/wanting to dye it weird colors or do SOMETHING with it that wont piss me off as much as it does now, and as much as the idea of cutting it back to how it normally is does.
I don't know. I want to make all these changes, and I know none of it will actually benefit me at all, and none of it will make me any happier, but I feel like I should at least TRY to escape this sudden ennui. But there's not really anything I can do about it, and the only things I can think of that would change anything are only going to put me in a worse situation overall, and get a lot of people pissed off at me. And I don't want to start drama, I just want things to be different.
Bleh. I'm being melodramatic again. x.o; But at least, for the time being, the temptation to just start calling people and saying things I'll regret is under control.
Maybe JB will call me tomorrow and we can do something. And maybe that'll help me figure out what the hell I'm thinking right now, because I honestly don't know anymore.
What's more likely is I'll just forget to think about it until I get home. And I guess that's fine too. I'm good at avoiding problems.