The pattern I notice is that there are a lot of people who are bar regulars and a lot of people who are regular for a concentrated interval. Presumably, though not always, people go to bars to hook up. As a regular I see a lot of new people who show up, are fairly aggressive and then never show back up... except maybe years later. (Presumably because they had boyfriends and the bars purpose was served).
Online dating has changed this somewhat so you can sort of replace "bar regualr" with "hotornot profile". You can track the same two patterns with active accounts.
Online I must admit I shut my profile down after a month... but it's out of frustration not because I have a boyfriend.
I don't think it's a safe assumption that people go to bars with the goal of hooking up. I think many people (type ones) are always on the lookout to become involved. Going to a bar might be a venue where they seek to fulfill that need. But assuming that "people" more generally go to bars to hook up ignores all of the other seedy and rotten reasons they (myself among them) enjoy such places.
I agree with your type distinctions, though. I'm definitely a type two and though I am glad about that right now, I might hate myself for it when I'm 99 and alone.
Well there are a lot of other reasons people go. A lot go to be social. You can generally tell these types as the ones who hang out with their friends and don't look at anyone else. Also the ones who show up with their boyfriends.
In general I think most people out at bars AREN'T seriously looking-- even though they may think that they are. If they were there would be a lot more interaction between strangers and a lot more people leaving together. The environment fosters that in only the most minimal sense.
Of the small subset of people who do use the bar for the purpose of introduction, there seems to be two kinds. I think of the rest as noise.
I like to go out and dance, even though I've given up on meeting anyone worthwhile there.
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Online dating has changed this somewhat so you can sort of replace "bar regualr" with "hotornot profile". You can track the same two patterns with active accounts.
Online I must admit I shut my profile down after a month... but it's out of frustration not because I have a boyfriend.
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I agree with your type distinctions, though. I'm definitely a type two and though I am glad about that right now, I might hate myself for it when I'm 99 and alone.
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In general I think most people out at bars AREN'T seriously looking-- even though they may think that they are. If they were there would be a lot more interaction between strangers and a lot more people leaving together. The environment fosters that in only the most minimal sense.
Of the small subset of people who do use the bar for the purpose of introduction, there seems to be two kinds. I think of the rest as noise.
I like to go out and dance, even though I've given up on meeting anyone worthwhile there.
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But today I decided I should cultivate friendships exclusively with bar-flies and other clubb trash.
Then I don't have to deal with the pretense of actually forming any kind of meaningful relationship.
Seems like a good enough reason to me. Your opinion?
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