JE/HSJ | Five Dramas Yamajima Never Starred In
title: Five Dramas Yamajima Never Starred In
fandom; pairing: JE/HSJ; platonic Yamajima
rating: PG
notes: For the Yamajima-thon. Appearances by several HSJ members and NEWS, because I love them. This is also a prime example of my utter fail at drabbles, lol. Note to self: drabbles =/= 500+ words.
disclaimer: Presumably, Johnny owns them and the last time I checked, I am not he.
one.
Yamada is the first to break the silence.
“I think there’s been a mistake,” he says.
The producer smiles and waves his hand at them in a way that makes both boys suspect he’d once been cast in some film or other as the token sexually-ambiguous male. “No mistake, Yamada-san; not at all. This is a modern fairytale; a wonderful interaction between the beautiful fantasies of the past and the sharp realities of the now.” He pauses, for effect. “Like Romeo and Juliet with Leonardo DiCaprio~! Have either of you boys seen it?”
Yamada ignores the question and sticks stubbornly (and with perhaps a small amount of desperation) to what’s relevant: “But why am I cast as the princess?!” His voice goes a little higher than he anticipated at the end (god, he hated going through puberty, even if it did mean he might be slightly taller than Yuto’s shoulder now), but he thinks his point still stands. Firmly.
The producer’s brows scrunch up a little and his lips turn down into what can only be called a pout. He picks up a photograph from the table, somehow managing a hairtoss in the action, and holds it up to them. “You do not like your dress, Yamada-san?” It looks like it came directly from a failed Disney movie, complete with lace, ruffles, and a faux-jewelled tiara.
A small noise to his left makes Yamada shoot a discrete glare up at Yuto, whose initial look of mutual horror has somehow morphed into amusement and a mild thoughtfulness as he looks at the monstrosity of a dress. Yamada doesn’t really think his imminent maiming by fabric was particularly funny. Turning back to the producer, he tries a different approach, hoping to get the man to see reason:
“If anyone is going to be the girl, it should at least be Yuto!”
two.
“What’s wrong with those two?”
Daiki looks up from where he’s concentrating on the latest chapter of Bleach to find Takaki leaning conspiratorially against the back of his chair; the older boy’s eyes are watching Yamada and Yuto across the room with a mixture of curiosity and concern. He’s going to fall again, Daiki thinks, shooting a wary look at the way Takaki’s chair was sneakily rolling rolling rolling away from under him, but out loud, he replies, “They’ve been tapped for a new drama.”
That gets him two raised eyebrows followed by Takaki’s “I’m thinking hard, yet still somehow failing to understand this” look.
“I don’t get it.”
With a small sigh, Daiki marks his place with a scrap piece of paper and turns his head to actually look at the duo in question. Yamada and Yuto are sitting together on the couch, back to back; Yamada looks like he’s catching a quick power nap and Yuto is staring off at some indiscernible point on the ceiling. He turns back to Takaki, who is still waiting for a reply as he leans further onto Daiki’s backrest. “Julie told them this morning that they might be getting a new drama,” he repeats at the other boy.
“They look like they’ve just lost their best friends,” Takaki counters.
“Baka. They are best friends.”
Unfortunately, Takaki fails to look wholly convinced by that response and just rolls back and forth on his chair with a thoughtful look in his eyes. (He really will fall off if he keeps doing that while trying to think at the same time, Daiki thinks, but again, says nothing.) After a minute passes, and then another, Daiki figures that Takaki’s attention span has drifted off and that it is now safe to return to shinigamis and arrancars and big shiny swordfights.
“What was the drama about?”
“… ha?”
“The drama, Dai-chan. What was it about?”
“… what does it matter?” But even as he says it, Daiki finds himself thinking back, trying to remember, because while Takaki might be a bit of an airhead most of the time, he was unusually perceptive to small nuances in their group’s dynamics. Secretly, Daiki suspects that he’s been getting special training sessions with Koyama-sempai. “I don’t know what their roles will be exactly yet, though it’s safe to assume leading. I think I heard Julie talking about a love triangle drama where two best friends fall for the same girl, only to find out that one of them has cancer and it’s all about friendship and love and self-discovery… you know, that kind of stuff that Julie thinks will ‘enhance our portfolios’ or some-”
Takaki cuts him off with a wave of his hand. “Cancer?”
“Something like that. Something where one of them die-oh. Oh.”
The two share a meaningful look, before simultaneously directing their gaze toward the younger duo on the sofa.
“You don’t really think they’re taking that seriously…?”
“You tell me; just look at them. It’s hard to act something like that and not invest a little bit of yourself, right? And they’re both fairly decent actors…”
“So what do we do?”
“… let’s talk to Koyama-sempai.”
A-ha, so he was right about those training sessions! But … “Will he be able to do anything?”
“He can talk to Tegoshi-sempai.”
“… ah.” And for the second time in less than ten minutes, Daiki has the metaphorical light bulb turned on for him by Takaki. It is beginning to feel slightly surreal, but he shrugs mentally and hoists himself up from the chair.
Takaki’s immediate fail as his own chair slides away like it has been threatening to do for the last five minutes and he loses his balance onto the floor makes Daiki feel just a little better. He promptly laughs at his groupmate, helps him up, and the two of them head off together to the NEWS dressing room in search of Johnny’s resident miracle maker.
(A friendly welcome from Koyama-sempai, two mugs of tea, and a cheerful “Believe!” from Tegoshi-sempai later, Daiki and Takaki return to find their own dressing room empty save for a quick scribble from Yuto saying that he and Yama-chan had been called away by Julie-san for a bit and they might be a little late for the next photoshoot so just go ahead and start without them, ne? The lack of tilde startles the two of them, but then, inexplicably, Tegoshi-sempai’s Believe! echoes in their ears again and they have no choice but to obey, after all.
The next day, Daiki hears from Hikaru who heard from Yabu that Julie-san was not in the best of moods because, apparently, the script for a drama that had been slotted to them had gone missing along with every other copy that had been made.
“Believe!”)
three.
“What’s wrong with them this time? Is it another drama? Did Yuto get cancer again?!”
Morimoto looks up at Takaki from his math homework and it is kind of amazing how unimpressed and “why me?” he manages to get his 13-year-old, I-still-have-baby-cheeks features to look. But Takaki can’t be properly amazed by this feat, because he is already bouncing off to clutch at the next unsuspecting victim in horror as he walks in the door.
It happens to be Hikaru, thus laying the grounds for the following conversation to ensue:
“Hikaru, Hikaru, do you think it’s the drama again?!”
“Uh, uh! WAIT DON’T TELL ME I KNOW THIS. …………… Yes.”
“Ohmygodohmygodohmygod oh no. They must have rewritten it! What if it’s worse this time? What if there are -”
“Pirates!” Hikaru supplies helpfully, though he is still not sure what game this is, but Takaki seems to be enthusiastic enough about it.
“THERE ARE PIRATES TOO NOW?”
“Pirates?” Inoo walks in with a small, confused frown, which sublimates into a dazzling smile of greeting for Hikaru before reverting back to confused.
“Yeah! And the girl has to be sacrificed or else a giant squid monster will rise up to eat them! But, of course, she gets saved and they get to fight the monster, but before all that they storm all the big ports and burn them and drink lots of hard liquor!” Hikaru is on a roll now.
Behind them, Morimoto’s forehead has just proclaimed its undying love for the tabletop by kissing it hard and repeatedly.
“But they’re not old enough! It’s not legal yet!” That was Takaki.
“… what’s going on?” And that was Inoo.
“Pirates don’t care about the law! They’re the terror of the seas and they can do whatever they want!”
“Are you talking about Johnny Depp?” Yuto asks curiously as he and Yamada arrive together.
“Yuto! Don’t do it-you’re not really a pirate and it’s illegal in Japan and your cancer ohmygod you still have cancer-”
“… I do?”
“And alcohol can’t be good for that and just promise me you won’t burn any villages and make anyone walk the plank even if it is a drama it can’t be good for you!”
Yuto blinks at him. “Ha?”
Yamada, somehow, miraculously manages to understand some of that jumble and he tugs Yuto away from Takaki with a small sigh. “Takaki-kun,” he begins.
“And Yamada! You can’t drink either and - !!”
“Takaki-kun.”
“… hai?”
“We don’t have any dramas scheduled for us next season. No pirates, no alcohol, no cancer” and he can’t help but make a face at that one “and no burning villages.” In the background, he can hear Morimoto’s pained, long-suffering expression.
“… oh. … okay then. That’s good to know.”
Keeping one hand wrapped loosely around Yuto’s wrist, Yamada begins to pull him out the door. “We’re going to go get some juice; we’ll bring some back for everyone too.”
Meanwhile, Hikaru has started to brandish a mock-sabre while standing triumphantly on a pile of defeated sofa cushions.
four.
It’s about a boy with a fascination for insects, but due to his poor health, has only ever been able to admire them in books and from the occasional half hour that he is allowed to be wheelchaired around outside. It is about him and the other boy-a street dancer-healthy, cheerful, sweet who volunteers at the hospital and together they open up the gates to their youth and the world. It is, in all ways, a perfect story for Nakajima Yuto and Yamada Ryosuke (who is always saying that he wants a different role apart from “cool” for once).
Thus, it cannot be blamed when Julie nearly chokes on her morning cappuccino (an extra shot of espresso, non-fat milk, hold the whipped cream) when the highly apologetic letter comes from the producers and director informing her that, in the end, Nakajima-san and Yamada-san were perhaps not quite the candidates they had been searching for.
(“Ne, ne, but Hercules beetles aren’t native to Japan; they live in South America. It’d be really hard to just find one in the wild here, ne?”
“Eh? That’s not a monarch butterfly! It’s a viceroy, ne? See, you can tell by that extra black stripe right there! Isn’t that cool?”
“It’s a Painted Lady! Look, Yama-chan~ I’ve never seen on in real life before. Wooooow~ isn’t it beautiful? I wonder why it’s called a Painted Lady though; it seems like kind of an odd name for a butterfly. I’ll make sure to look it up tonight~ ♪”
The overwhelming consensus among the production staff was that maybe Nakajima Yuto-san was just a little overqualified for the role.)
five.
“A love triangle?” Yamada repeats sceptically while Yuto clutches his juice can tighter.
“A comedy! A love comedy!” the producer reassures them with a dazzling smile that he no doubt perfects in front of the mirror every morning and night. “About a girl who dresses up as a boy to attend an all-boys school that you two attend. Think a little HanaKimi mixed with some Hana Yori Dango.”
Yamada’s not even sure that’s legal, but Yuto beats him to the punch. “Who’s the girl?”
The producer beams, obviously expecting this question. “We’re considering someone very familiar to the two of you.”
The boys share a look; they haven’t co-starred with many of the same young, female actors after all.
“Chinen-san.”
There’s a pause. That stretches into silence; one of those awkward ones where someone says something so off that you’re not even considering replying and are instead searching the area for all viable escape routes.
Behind them, their manager coughs discretely. “Chinen-kun is male, Akira-san.”
The three of them watch in equal parts amusement and morbid fascination as incomprehension dawns into abashed realization into dejection on Akira-san’s face.
Later, Chinen pouts when Yamada and Yuto tell him and everyone else laughs and ruffles his hair. Takaki is somehow persuaded to first buy Chinen lunch and then to treat all of JUMP to soothe the younger boy’s dignity.
(end)
Unbeta'd, thus edits are greatly appreciated~
fandom; pairing: JE/HSJ; platonic Yamajima
rating: PG
notes: For the Yamajima-thon. Appearances by several HSJ members and NEWS, because I love them. This is also a prime example of my utter fail at drabbles, lol. Note to self: drabbles =/= 500+ words.
disclaimer: Presumably, Johnny owns them and the last time I checked, I am not he.
one.
Yamada is the first to break the silence.
“I think there’s been a mistake,” he says.
The producer smiles and waves his hand at them in a way that makes both boys suspect he’d once been cast in some film or other as the token sexually-ambiguous male. “No mistake, Yamada-san; not at all. This is a modern fairytale; a wonderful interaction between the beautiful fantasies of the past and the sharp realities of the now.” He pauses, for effect. “Like Romeo and Juliet with Leonardo DiCaprio~! Have either of you boys seen it?”
Yamada ignores the question and sticks stubbornly (and with perhaps a small amount of desperation) to what’s relevant: “But why am I cast as the princess?!” His voice goes a little higher than he anticipated at the end (god, he hated going through puberty, even if it did mean he might be slightly taller than Yuto’s shoulder now), but he thinks his point still stands. Firmly.
The producer’s brows scrunch up a little and his lips turn down into what can only be called a pout. He picks up a photograph from the table, somehow managing a hairtoss in the action, and holds it up to them. “You do not like your dress, Yamada-san?” It looks like it came directly from a failed Disney movie, complete with lace, ruffles, and a faux-jewelled tiara.
A small noise to his left makes Yamada shoot a discrete glare up at Yuto, whose initial look of mutual horror has somehow morphed into amusement and a mild thoughtfulness as he looks at the monstrosity of a dress. Yamada doesn’t really think his imminent maiming by fabric was particularly funny. Turning back to the producer, he tries a different approach, hoping to get the man to see reason:
“If anyone is going to be the girl, it should at least be Yuto!”
two.
“What’s wrong with those two?”
Daiki looks up from where he’s concentrating on the latest chapter of Bleach to find Takaki leaning conspiratorially against the back of his chair; the older boy’s eyes are watching Yamada and Yuto across the room with a mixture of curiosity and concern. He’s going to fall again, Daiki thinks, shooting a wary look at the way Takaki’s chair was sneakily rolling rolling rolling away from under him, but out loud, he replies, “They’ve been tapped for a new drama.”
That gets him two raised eyebrows followed by Takaki’s “I’m thinking hard, yet still somehow failing to understand this” look.
“I don’t get it.”
With a small sigh, Daiki marks his place with a scrap piece of paper and turns his head to actually look at the duo in question. Yamada and Yuto are sitting together on the couch, back to back; Yamada looks like he’s catching a quick power nap and Yuto is staring off at some indiscernible point on the ceiling. He turns back to Takaki, who is still waiting for a reply as he leans further onto Daiki’s backrest. “Julie told them this morning that they might be getting a new drama,” he repeats at the other boy.
“They look like they’ve just lost their best friends,” Takaki counters.
“Baka. They are best friends.”
Unfortunately, Takaki fails to look wholly convinced by that response and just rolls back and forth on his chair with a thoughtful look in his eyes. (He really will fall off if he keeps doing that while trying to think at the same time, Daiki thinks, but again, says nothing.) After a minute passes, and then another, Daiki figures that Takaki’s attention span has drifted off and that it is now safe to return to shinigamis and arrancars and big shiny swordfights.
“What was the drama about?”
“… ha?”
“The drama, Dai-chan. What was it about?”
“… what does it matter?” But even as he says it, Daiki finds himself thinking back, trying to remember, because while Takaki might be a bit of an airhead most of the time, he was unusually perceptive to small nuances in their group’s dynamics. Secretly, Daiki suspects that he’s been getting special training sessions with Koyama-sempai. “I don’t know what their roles will be exactly yet, though it’s safe to assume leading. I think I heard Julie talking about a love triangle drama where two best friends fall for the same girl, only to find out that one of them has cancer and it’s all about friendship and love and self-discovery… you know, that kind of stuff that Julie thinks will ‘enhance our portfolios’ or some-”
Takaki cuts him off with a wave of his hand. “Cancer?”
“Something like that. Something where one of them die-oh. Oh.”
The two share a meaningful look, before simultaneously directing their gaze toward the younger duo on the sofa.
“You don’t really think they’re taking that seriously…?”
“You tell me; just look at them. It’s hard to act something like that and not invest a little bit of yourself, right? And they’re both fairly decent actors…”
“So what do we do?”
“… let’s talk to Koyama-sempai.”
A-ha, so he was right about those training sessions! But … “Will he be able to do anything?”
“He can talk to Tegoshi-sempai.”
“… ah.” And for the second time in less than ten minutes, Daiki has the metaphorical light bulb turned on for him by Takaki. It is beginning to feel slightly surreal, but he shrugs mentally and hoists himself up from the chair.
Takaki’s immediate fail as his own chair slides away like it has been threatening to do for the last five minutes and he loses his balance onto the floor makes Daiki feel just a little better. He promptly laughs at his groupmate, helps him up, and the two of them head off together to the NEWS dressing room in search of Johnny’s resident miracle maker.
(A friendly welcome from Koyama-sempai, two mugs of tea, and a cheerful “Believe!” from Tegoshi-sempai later, Daiki and Takaki return to find their own dressing room empty save for a quick scribble from Yuto saying that he and Yama-chan had been called away by Julie-san for a bit and they might be a little late for the next photoshoot so just go ahead and start without them, ne? The lack of tilde startles the two of them, but then, inexplicably, Tegoshi-sempai’s Believe! echoes in their ears again and they have no choice but to obey, after all.
The next day, Daiki hears from Hikaru who heard from Yabu that Julie-san was not in the best of moods because, apparently, the script for a drama that had been slotted to them had gone missing along with every other copy that had been made.
“Believe!”)
three.
“What’s wrong with them this time? Is it another drama? Did Yuto get cancer again?!”
Morimoto looks up at Takaki from his math homework and it is kind of amazing how unimpressed and “why me?” he manages to get his 13-year-old, I-still-have-baby-cheeks features to look. But Takaki can’t be properly amazed by this feat, because he is already bouncing off to clutch at the next unsuspecting victim in horror as he walks in the door.
It happens to be Hikaru, thus laying the grounds for the following conversation to ensue:
“Hikaru, Hikaru, do you think it’s the drama again?!”
“Uh, uh! WAIT DON’T TELL ME I KNOW THIS. …………… Yes.”
“Ohmygodohmygodohmygod oh no. They must have rewritten it! What if it’s worse this time? What if there are -”
“Pirates!” Hikaru supplies helpfully, though he is still not sure what game this is, but Takaki seems to be enthusiastic enough about it.
“THERE ARE PIRATES TOO NOW?”
“Pirates?” Inoo walks in with a small, confused frown, which sublimates into a dazzling smile of greeting for Hikaru before reverting back to confused.
“Yeah! And the girl has to be sacrificed or else a giant squid monster will rise up to eat them! But, of course, she gets saved and they get to fight the monster, but before all that they storm all the big ports and burn them and drink lots of hard liquor!” Hikaru is on a roll now.
Behind them, Morimoto’s forehead has just proclaimed its undying love for the tabletop by kissing it hard and repeatedly.
“But they’re not old enough! It’s not legal yet!” That was Takaki.
“… what’s going on?” And that was Inoo.
“Pirates don’t care about the law! They’re the terror of the seas and they can do whatever they want!”
“Are you talking about Johnny Depp?” Yuto asks curiously as he and Yamada arrive together.
“Yuto! Don’t do it-you’re not really a pirate and it’s illegal in Japan and your cancer ohmygod you still have cancer-”
“… I do?”
“And alcohol can’t be good for that and just promise me you won’t burn any villages and make anyone walk the plank even if it is a drama it can’t be good for you!”
Yuto blinks at him. “Ha?”
Yamada, somehow, miraculously manages to understand some of that jumble and he tugs Yuto away from Takaki with a small sigh. “Takaki-kun,” he begins.
“And Yamada! You can’t drink either and - !!”
“Takaki-kun.”
“… hai?”
“We don’t have any dramas scheduled for us next season. No pirates, no alcohol, no cancer” and he can’t help but make a face at that one “and no burning villages.” In the background, he can hear Morimoto’s pained, long-suffering expression.
“… oh. … okay then. That’s good to know.”
Keeping one hand wrapped loosely around Yuto’s wrist, Yamada begins to pull him out the door. “We’re going to go get some juice; we’ll bring some back for everyone too.”
Meanwhile, Hikaru has started to brandish a mock-sabre while standing triumphantly on a pile of defeated sofa cushions.
four.
It’s about a boy with a fascination for insects, but due to his poor health, has only ever been able to admire them in books and from the occasional half hour that he is allowed to be wheelchaired around outside. It is about him and the other boy-a street dancer-healthy, cheerful, sweet who volunteers at the hospital and together they open up the gates to their youth and the world. It is, in all ways, a perfect story for Nakajima Yuto and Yamada Ryosuke (who is always saying that he wants a different role apart from “cool” for once).
Thus, it cannot be blamed when Julie nearly chokes on her morning cappuccino (an extra shot of espresso, non-fat milk, hold the whipped cream) when the highly apologetic letter comes from the producers and director informing her that, in the end, Nakajima-san and Yamada-san were perhaps not quite the candidates they had been searching for.
(“Ne, ne, but Hercules beetles aren’t native to Japan; they live in South America. It’d be really hard to just find one in the wild here, ne?”
“Eh? That’s not a monarch butterfly! It’s a viceroy, ne? See, you can tell by that extra black stripe right there! Isn’t that cool?”
“It’s a Painted Lady! Look, Yama-chan~ I’ve never seen on in real life before. Wooooow~ isn’t it beautiful? I wonder why it’s called a Painted Lady though; it seems like kind of an odd name for a butterfly. I’ll make sure to look it up tonight~ ♪”
The overwhelming consensus among the production staff was that maybe Nakajima Yuto-san was just a little overqualified for the role.)
five.
“A love triangle?” Yamada repeats sceptically while Yuto clutches his juice can tighter.
“A comedy! A love comedy!” the producer reassures them with a dazzling smile that he no doubt perfects in front of the mirror every morning and night. “About a girl who dresses up as a boy to attend an all-boys school that you two attend. Think a little HanaKimi mixed with some Hana Yori Dango.”
Yamada’s not even sure that’s legal, but Yuto beats him to the punch. “Who’s the girl?”
The producer beams, obviously expecting this question. “We’re considering someone very familiar to the two of you.”
The boys share a look; they haven’t co-starred with many of the same young, female actors after all.
“Chinen-san.”
There’s a pause. That stretches into silence; one of those awkward ones where someone says something so off that you’re not even considering replying and are instead searching the area for all viable escape routes.
Behind them, their manager coughs discretely. “Chinen-kun is male, Akira-san.”
The three of them watch in equal parts amusement and morbid fascination as incomprehension dawns into abashed realization into dejection on Akira-san’s face.
Later, Chinen pouts when Yamada and Yuto tell him and everyone else laughs and ruffles his hair. Takaki is somehow persuaded to first buy Chinen lunch and then to treat all of JUMP to soothe the younger boy’s dignity.
(end)
Unbeta'd, thus edits are greatly appreciated~