(no subject)
Title: Define Dangerous
Characters: Sylar, Claire.
Spoilers: Up to Season 2.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 4773 (exta long finale)
Chapter: 28/28 (ie. THE END!)
Previously: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20, Chapter 21, Chapter 22, Chapter 23, Chapter 24, Chapter 25, Chapter 26 , Chapter 27
Summary: While escaping the Company, Sylar meets up with someone from his past. Together, they must piece together some semblance of normality after years of captivity. Future AU.
There were no words to explain the ache in her heart or the emptiness she felt, so Claire stayed silent through the whole walk to town and the bus ride back to Maine. She slept on Peter's shoulder, letting the roar of the bus motor lull her into a false security as she escaped into her dreams, like she always used to when life in the company grew too painful.
While she slept, Claire dreamt of the explosion again, bright flames consuming everything in their path, people dying all around her and her desire to see the company burn. She'd never been so vengeful in her life but she hoped that every single member of the company died when Sylar sacrificed himself. It would mean something then, it would be the final payback to the bastards that were so content on destroying their lives.
“Hey.” Peter shook her gently and she yawned to life. “We're here. A few blocks from my cabin.”
She replied with a small nod as the breaks on the bus screeched at their stop, saying nothing else. Peter gave her a worried glance, similar to the one Sylar used to give her the first few days after escaping the company the first time. She'd returned to withdrawing inward when things hurt so much; the rest of the world returned to hoping she would say something to show she was okay.
She followed her uncle, the bright afternoon sun shining as they made their way from the bus stop to his cabin. It was only her second time in the neighborhood but she didn't even give it one look to see what kind of place she would be living in now. Claire kept her head down, starring at her feet as her mind replayed Sylar's death, over and over again, in such vivid detail. She could barely focus on anything else.
Why did everything have to be so confusing all the time? She only finally realized what Sylar meant to her before it was their time to say goodbye.
When Peter halted in front of the cabin, she peeked her head up and couldn't help thinking about the first time she'd been there, the only time. Sylar was so insistent that Peter listen to her, that he stop being such a jerk and let her back into his life. They'd succeeded at that goal, but at what cost. She'd never felt more alone than she did right then.
“Welcome home.” Peter reached for the extra key underneath a fake rock. “We can go shopping for some clothes and things for you tomorrow, if you'd like.. I know you don't have much.”
She stopped at the threshold of the cabin and then paused to look back at Peter's car, the little blue cavalier in the driveway. She grew frantic and stepped down, away from the cabin and stopped halfway to the car. “We have to go back to the bed and breakfast. I have to get the rest of my things. Peter will you drive me there, now?”
“What? I bet that place is a crime scene by now, police crawling all over it. Whatever's there that's so important we can just replace.” Peter replied as he shoved the key into the door lock. “Nathan set up a fund for you--”
Claire held her jaw tight, willing herself not to break down in front of her uncle. He didn't understand, he couldn't. He hadn't lost anyone he cared about today. “Sylar's things are back in the room. I need to get them, Peter. I can't just forget about them. I can't just leave them there. I--”
“Okay.” He said softly as she began to lose control. He ran a hand over her hair and for the first time in years, Claire felt like she had some sort of family to steady her while the world continued to throw curve balls at her. Sylar was gone but at least he made sure she would be protected in his absence. “It's okay. I'll get my keys and we'll drive over there.”
Peter did as promised and they pulled into the parking lot of the bed and breakfast after a short drive. They didn't have a key, so he got them into the room with the help of his telekinesis. Thankfully, the door was still the simple mechanical key lock type, which was much easier to manipulate with his powers than digital locks.
No one was there; the room was exactly as they left it, water stain on the carpet and all. Claire moved through the room silently, taking in the sight of so much destruction. She touched her fingertips to the bed, connecting to it through tangible, physical touch. At least one thing from her night with Sylar remained, if nothing else did anymore. She bit her lip to keep her emotions from spilling out and causing a mess in the already destroyed room.
“We can't stay long.” Peter reminded her quietly as he leaned against the door, silently observing Claire as she attempted to make some peace with what had happened. He was right, sooner or later someone from the front desk or housekeeping would want to know what they were doing there. It was a wonder they hadn't already cleaned out the room.
She gathered a few clothes that littered the floor; they all carried Sylar's smell on them and she could almost imagine he was there if she closed her eyes long enough. She took in a shuddering breath but before Peter could wrap her into a comforting hug, she pushed him off and said. “I'll be okay. I will.”
It was a bold faced lie but she swore by it.
She gathered their clothes, threw them in Sylar's duffel bag and walked back out to the car. Peter followed behind her, at a loss for words but she could tell he cared and wanted to help. He wanted to make things right by his niece, even though he had no idea where to start fixing this problem. She was thankful but life still would never be the same.
By the time they arrived back at Peter's cabin the second time, Claire was exhausted and all she wanted to do was sleep for a hundred years. Maybe by the time she woke up things would be better. Maybe she wouldn't even wake up at all, which in her mind was just as well.
He led her up the stairs to the second floor and into a guest bedroom. He explained back in the car that she would be welcome at his place for as long as she wanted to stay. She dropped the duffel bag on hard wood floor and told herself that this was home now. This was her room, with the view overlooking the lake and the wrought iron bed, antique dresser and cherry wood vanity. She could be happy here.
“Like I said before,” Peter started, a bit embarrassed and unsure of himself. They were family and yet they were so very estranged from each other; it felt strange to even be in the same room as him. In time, she hoped that would change. “Nathan set up a fund for you back when he knew the company would come after him, so if you need anything at all, the money's in the bank waiting for you. It'll help you get back on your feet again.”
She starred out the window, not able to look at her uncle after all the trouble she'd caused him and his family. “I never meant-- I never meant for him to die because of me, Peter. I never wanted that to happen.” It was so hard to talk about the past, especially now that Peter let her back into his life. Claire needed Peter to know this though, to really understand her point of view. “I-- I loved my father and I'm just so tired of everyone dying because of me. I just hurts so much and I don't know how to make it stop.”
Peter crossed the room, gathering her up in his arms and she held onto him for dear life. He was her only anchor in this crazy, mixed up world which made absolutely no sense to her anymore. She almost missed the confines of the company that she'd left only a week ago. Back then life was filled with more physical pain than emotional and she was free to bottle up her emotions. She didn't have to deal with this heartache back when she was so dead inside.
“Oh, Claire.” He finally spoke, breaking through her self-inflicted guilt. “I am so sorry for what I said. It was wrong of me. You had nothing to do with your father's death. It was the company's fault, not yours. God, I never should have.. Nathan only wanted you to be safe. He loved you so much.”
She nuzzled herself deeper into his chest, needing to feel his warmth as she let his words sink into her heart. She couldn't help asking for more reassurance. “Are you sure?”
“Are you kidding? He was crazy about you. He kept talking about how he hoped you would go to college in New York so he could see you more often than he did. He would have given up anything for you.. and when he made the final choice not to turn you into the company, when he fought them to keep you safe for just a little bit longer, I should have realized that he was doing it out of love but after I lost my brother.. things just stopped making sense to me for a long time.”
“Do you love me, Peter?” After what she put him through, Claire didn't know if he could anymore. She was half afraid he'd only been talked into letting her stay through some act of violence on Sylar's part. He didn't really want her around, he wanted a quiet life with a normal family and a whole lot less of her craziness. She was sure of it.
“More than I could understand when I kicked you out of my life yesterday.” He paused, stopping to take a look at her to make sure she was really there in his arms. “It may be the first time in my life that I'm glad Sylar kicked my ass. Someone needed to beat some sense into this old head of mine.”
“So he did kick your butt, didn't he?” She grinned slightly and when Peter wouldn't answer her question she knew what Sylar had done for her. She laughed, despite everything she'd been through in the past twenty-four hours. Sylar had always excelled at solving his problem through the sledgehammer approach.
“Hey, I almost kick his ass right back. If he hadn't been so determined, I would have totally won.” Peter laughed along with her, attempting to hold onto his dignity as was flushed away. He ran his thumb along her chin and then added. “Why don't you get some sleep? You must be tired. I have some calls to make but I'll be downstairs if you need anything.”
She nodded, overwhelmed by the need for rest. After Peter left and shut off the light, she grabbed one of Sylar's shirts from the duffel bag and changed into it. It was large enough to act as a nightgown for her and it kept him close to her, allowing her to snuggle up with him even after he was gone.
Claire climbed into bed and slept from late afternoon all the way through the night and into the early morning. When she fell into dreams that night, they were more peaceful ones but Sylar was still in them. He played the part of her hero, fighting off imaginary demons and keeping the nightmares at bay. That's how she would always see him now, despite their past issues and the deaths committed at his hands. In her dreams, it didn't matter what happened in the past. He was still alive, he wasn't exploding and no one was dying, there was no death or pain, it was like it should have been. A boy in love with a girl with their whole lives ahead of them.
By the time Claire woke up after the first night spent at Peter's cabin, he'd managed to sign her up with a therapist, a good one-- one that believed her stories about companies kidnapping her, superpowers and brain-stealing enemies who turned out to be not so bad after all.
When Peter told her about her first appointment, Claire almost rebelled.. until she realized that it might be good to talk to someone. She'd been through so much over the past couple of years, she sometimes thought she would be swallowed up in the crap that had already consumed so much of her life.
On the car ride over to the doctor's office, that first Monday session, Claire asked. “How did you find a doctor who knows about our abilities anyway?”
“Mohinder.” Peter replied. “Dr. Valsamis is one of his colleagues. They went to school together but they were in separate programs. He said she's a good therapist and knows a bit about Mohinder's work with evolved human genetics, so you won't have to hide anything from her.”
"Mohinder?" She watched him put on his blinker and make a turn down the town's main road. When they came to a red light, she asked, “I thought you decided that you didn't want to speak to anyone from your old life.”
He stopped to take a look at her and she could tell he was seeing her own strength. He seemed proud of her and unsure of himself. “We all have our demons to face down, Claire. Having you back in my life is reminding me of all the things I left behind, all the friends. I was stupid to run away from my problems.” He returned his attention to the road ahead. “My brother never would have left like that.”
She placed a hand on his shoulder, finally accepting the fact that while Peter didn't have all the answers, he did have a desire to find them. That was enough for her to place her trust in him. “You weren't there for his lumberjack beard growing phase, Peter. Trust me, my father had his share of issues too and you're on par with him, as far as I'm concerned.”
“I just want us to be okay again.”
“We will be.”
The cold northern winter melted into spring, which gave way to a warm, dry summer. There was new life all around her, springing forth to give her hope even while she still grieved for all the things she lost. She spent much of her time silently walking along the shore, searching for some meaning to pull her through the pain.
On a whole, Claire was doing much better than she was before. She could swear the therapist possessed the power to heal others. Dr. Valsamis denied this and reminded her that all the progress they made was a result of Claire's own efforts. After some time, Claire learned that it was okay to still hurt over Sylar's death and it was okay to still want to seek revenge on the other branches of the company. Her feelings were valid and she would be okay.
She was dealing, sharing, coping-- the whole shebang.. but there were still times like today when the wind shifted a certain way and shadows grew over the lake, times when she could still recall Sylar's touch and miss him being around so badly it felt like a physical ache.
On one of her travels around the lake, Claire found a small camping resort not far from Peter's house. Parents would bring their young children there to play at the beach and camp under the stars. She would stand and watch them from under the shadow of the pine trees, the unseen observer to their happiness. She eventually stopped going down there because it only brought up envious feelings. Everyone there looked so happy; it didn't seem fair.
Peter was her rock during the hardest of times but even he was difficult to be around. Desperate to repair the rift between them, he tried to do everything to make her happy and alleviate his own guilt. Claire hated to be that much trouble to him. Then there were the things they couldn't share because they were on such different pages about certain topics and certain people that they might as well be in different books.
“Did you sign up for those summer classes today?” Peter asked, placing a hamburger on her plate, fresh from the barbecue he was cooking up. Dinner by the lake, with the sunset going down over the water with the uncle she once thought she lost forever.. it should have been perfect.
She blinked, coming back into the present moment and nodded. “It's only one class.”
“Remind me: which one was that again?” He joined her at the table with a plate of french fries. Early evenings by the lake were gorgeous, complete with the slight breeze and the sound of the waves crashing against the rocky shore. Occasionally, a few sailboats could be seen in the distance. It was her favorite time of day and often brought about a sense of wonderment.
“Some.. economics class.” He seemed interested in her life, which was all she had ever wanted so she lied to him at first. It was better than bringing up sore subjects. Then she caught saw the tiny downturn of his frown; he knew her too well for Claire to lie to him these days. “Okay.. okay, I'm taking a class on horology down at the Portland College of Art. An introduction to the science and art of watchmaking.”
She starred down at her food, feeling stupid and guilty. Claire's therapist told her that she could honor Sylar's memory any way she chose fit but this still felt like a tiny betrayal on her part. She turned away, fearing Peter might show the old hatred he held for Sylar. That was exactly what she didn't need to deal with right now.
He played dumb, avoiding the topic that always sat between them like one giant elephant. “Is there any particular reason why you might be taking a class on that subject? You weren't coerced by some cute boy down at the registration office were you?”
“What?”
“Oh, it's just that that happened to me once. I ended up taking a class on the woman's movement during the Victorian age and..” He trailed off, his attempt at changing the subject failed miserably. Peter nodded, pointing out the obvious. “And you still miss him.”
She pressed her lips together, willing herself not to speak on the subject but she couldn't pretend everything was fine anymore. “I do.. I miss him so much. After everything that happened with Sylar and those two years before that in the company.. I don't even know who I am anymore.”
“Maybe you should reinvent yourself,” he offered, between bites of his french fries. It was what he did years ago, his solution to his own pain. It wasn't such a bad idea, as long as she didn't turn her back on the past completely. “This is your chance, isn't it? A whole new life, in a new state.. going to a new college when the semester starts.”
“I could get a new name. I could be.. Rolex.” She grinned and pointed a french fry at him.
“Well, it's either that or Gucci. And you don't quite strike me as a Gucci.” Peter shot back, eager to keep her in a good mood since Claire could rarely stay happy for very long these days. “But you know, Claire.. he may still be out there. I have a feeling he may surprise you yet.”
“How can you be so sure?”
He shrugged. “Well, I exploded and I'm still alive.”
It was meant to inspire her but Claire wouldn't hold out hope.
Life was moving on and Claire hated the way the seasons changed without her approval or say so. The world had no right to keep on turning, not when the one person who should be watching the seasons change with her wasn't there.
Some days were easier and she was able to go about her daily routine like a normal college student, hiding what happened to her from the rest of the world. Others, like today, were so hard that all she wanted to do was sleep in late, keep to herself and ignore all the to-do's on her list of the day's errands. It wasn't worth doing anything, nothing she could do would bring him back.
She skipped out of school again that afternoon. It was that boy that sat in front of her in class, the one who told her she looked pretty yesterday. He was nice, funny, normal.. but he wasn't Sylar and his advances only made Claire miss the man she'd lost all the more.
Claire looked up from where she sat on the old, wooden swing that hung from one of the trees that dotted the shoreline. Peter walked out from the house and down to where she was sitting, talking to someone on Mohinder's cell phone in his hand. She closed her eyes, remembering her promise to send the cell phone back to the doctor. It was one more thing on her list that she'd been putting off.
“You have a phone call.” He waved the cell phone in front of her, seeming overly excited for some reason. It was an act he put on for her on worst days, like he was a parent motivating their child to eat their supper. “Someone really wants to speak with you.”
It was probably just another stupid call from school or maybe Mohinder asking to get his phone back again. Either way, she really didn't want to be bothered or shaken out of her unhappy mood. “Tell them I'll call them back later.”
“Okay. If that's what you want.” He understood; he was getting better figuring out when to push her forward and when to let her be alone. She returned to starring at one of the sailboats out on the lake hoist anchor while Peter resumed talking on the phone, rather loudly. “Yeah, Claire doesn't want to talk to anyone, Sylar.”
Claire picked her head up, her frown fading slightly.
“Yeah.. I don't know what to tell you, Sylar.. she's just really upset lately. She misses someone.. I don't know who that could be.” Peter spoke again. Claire turned to listen to his end of the conversation. He couldn't have just said what she thought he just said. “Yes, you've already told me that you're busy and you won't be able to get to another phone until the next week, Sylar.. maybe by the time you call back, she'll want to--”
“Give me the phone!” Claire darted up from the swing, jumping after Peter as he began to walk back to the house in a slow, leisurely pace. She was quick on his heels, rushing to reach him before he hung up. “Peter, wait! Gimme the phone. Come on.”
“I thought you didn't want to talk to anyone.” He smirked, teasing her, placing his hand over the mouthpiece of the phone. “I don't want to bother you so, I'll just let Sylar know he'll have to call back later.” She clung to his arm but he was enjoying this game a bit too much to end it so quickly. He paused to speak to the person on the other line. “Yeah, so if you'll just call back when you get another chance..”
“Peter!” She kicked him in the shin, lightly.
“Oh wait, Claire just decided she wants to talk to you.” Peter said before he handed over the cell phone. She took it in her trembling hands, starring down at the phone like it was a foreign object. She didn't know what to say.. this was all taking her by surprise. He patted her on the head, softly. “Go on, Claire. He wants to speak to you.”
She took a deep breath, brought the phone to her ear and stuttered out a hello. “Sy-sylar?”
There was a pause on the line and for a brief instant, Claire thought maybe this was all a cruel trick. Peter wouldn't do something like that though, not now after living together for six months. He finally answered her, a bit apprehensive. “I've missed you, Claire.”
“I.. oh god. Is that really you?” Claire felt herself going numb in shock and made sure to sit down on the front stairs before she fell over. There were tears in her eyes, happy ones this time. She was glad that he wasn't there for once. She didn't want him to see her crying like a baby. “I-- I thought you were dead.”
“Me? Please.” He scoffed. The old familiar cockiness rose in his voice. There was also an inherent tiredness which he seemed intent on to covering up. “The company can't keep me down for long. You should know that by now. How have you been? Peter told me you were.. upset.”
“How have I been?!” She suddenly felt very angry at his nonchalant tone. It was like experiencing the five stages of grief in reverse. “Oh, you know, I've just been great after watching someone I really cared about burst into flames and then disappear for six months to let me presume him dead.”
“..I'm sorry.”
“What?” She furrowed her eyebrows, wondering if this was indeed the same Sylar she once knew. Since when did he ever say sorry.
He sighed. “I'm sorry. I should have called sooner. I didn't know you would miss me that much. I didn't think you would miss me at all.”
“Well, I did. A lot. And if you ever almost die again, I'm going to kill you.” She paused before gathering enough courage to ask for more details. “How did you almost die but not really die anyway?”
“I survived the explosion.” He explained. “Evolution saw fit to make those of us with induced radioactivity immune to our own power.. unfortunately by the time I figured this out a whole building had already fallen on top of me. I spent a week waiting for the Red Cross rescue team to dig me out of there.. a few more in the hospital thinking about how to take down the rest of the company, which is why I'm calling. I wanted to know if you want to help.”
That peeked her attention. Peter may not like her getting involved with a plot to take down the rest of the company, but she owed it to her family to do what she could to destroy the company that took their lives.
“I'm game.” She set her jaw determinedly. “What did you have in mind?”
“I'm not sure yet.. I was thinking about breaking into more of their facilities and exploding again, but well.. it was kind of painful the first time around.” He laughed before turning more serious. “Would it be okay if I came up there so we could talk about this plan.. and other things?”
“When have you ever needed my permission for anything you've ever done?”
“Ah, that's right.” He replied before putting on a show of menacing bravado. “I'll be there in three days, whether you like it or not.”
She laughed again. “I'll see you then.”
“Oh, and Claire?”
“Yes?”
He hesitated, “..I love you.”
By the time she could recover from the shock of Sylar's words, he'd hung up and the phone went dead. She starred at it for a moment, wishing he didn't leave so abruptly but she also knew that these things were hard for him. He wasn't used to loving or being loved.. but she would teach him what it meant. He was, as he'd shown in the past, a quick learner.
Claire left the phone on the steps and walked out to the lake. A breeze blew through the trees, whipping her hair around her face. The company wasn't going to know what hit it. They would all pay and she would finally be able to rest after everything they'd done to her and Sylar.
She was ready.
-THE END-
Characters: Sylar, Claire.
Spoilers: Up to Season 2.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 4773 (exta long finale)
Chapter: 28/28 (ie. THE END!)
Previously: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20, Chapter 21, Chapter 22, Chapter 23, Chapter 24, Chapter 25, Chapter 26 , Chapter 27
Summary: While escaping the Company, Sylar meets up with someone from his past. Together, they must piece together some semblance of normality after years of captivity. Future AU.
There were no words to explain the ache in her heart or the emptiness she felt, so Claire stayed silent through the whole walk to town and the bus ride back to Maine. She slept on Peter's shoulder, letting the roar of the bus motor lull her into a false security as she escaped into her dreams, like she always used to when life in the company grew too painful.
While she slept, Claire dreamt of the explosion again, bright flames consuming everything in their path, people dying all around her and her desire to see the company burn. She'd never been so vengeful in her life but she hoped that every single member of the company died when Sylar sacrificed himself. It would mean something then, it would be the final payback to the bastards that were so content on destroying their lives.
“Hey.” Peter shook her gently and she yawned to life. “We're here. A few blocks from my cabin.”
She replied with a small nod as the breaks on the bus screeched at their stop, saying nothing else. Peter gave her a worried glance, similar to the one Sylar used to give her the first few days after escaping the company the first time. She'd returned to withdrawing inward when things hurt so much; the rest of the world returned to hoping she would say something to show she was okay.
She followed her uncle, the bright afternoon sun shining as they made their way from the bus stop to his cabin. It was only her second time in the neighborhood but she didn't even give it one look to see what kind of place she would be living in now. Claire kept her head down, starring at her feet as her mind replayed Sylar's death, over and over again, in such vivid detail. She could barely focus on anything else.
Why did everything have to be so confusing all the time? She only finally realized what Sylar meant to her before it was their time to say goodbye.
When Peter halted in front of the cabin, she peeked her head up and couldn't help thinking about the first time she'd been there, the only time. Sylar was so insistent that Peter listen to her, that he stop being such a jerk and let her back into his life. They'd succeeded at that goal, but at what cost. She'd never felt more alone than she did right then.
“Welcome home.” Peter reached for the extra key underneath a fake rock. “We can go shopping for some clothes and things for you tomorrow, if you'd like.. I know you don't have much.”
She stopped at the threshold of the cabin and then paused to look back at Peter's car, the little blue cavalier in the driveway. She grew frantic and stepped down, away from the cabin and stopped halfway to the car. “We have to go back to the bed and breakfast. I have to get the rest of my things. Peter will you drive me there, now?”
“What? I bet that place is a crime scene by now, police crawling all over it. Whatever's there that's so important we can just replace.” Peter replied as he shoved the key into the door lock. “Nathan set up a fund for you--”
Claire held her jaw tight, willing herself not to break down in front of her uncle. He didn't understand, he couldn't. He hadn't lost anyone he cared about today. “Sylar's things are back in the room. I need to get them, Peter. I can't just forget about them. I can't just leave them there. I--”
“Okay.” He said softly as she began to lose control. He ran a hand over her hair and for the first time in years, Claire felt like she had some sort of family to steady her while the world continued to throw curve balls at her. Sylar was gone but at least he made sure she would be protected in his absence. “It's okay. I'll get my keys and we'll drive over there.”
Peter did as promised and they pulled into the parking lot of the bed and breakfast after a short drive. They didn't have a key, so he got them into the room with the help of his telekinesis. Thankfully, the door was still the simple mechanical key lock type, which was much easier to manipulate with his powers than digital locks.
No one was there; the room was exactly as they left it, water stain on the carpet and all. Claire moved through the room silently, taking in the sight of so much destruction. She touched her fingertips to the bed, connecting to it through tangible, physical touch. At least one thing from her night with Sylar remained, if nothing else did anymore. She bit her lip to keep her emotions from spilling out and causing a mess in the already destroyed room.
“We can't stay long.” Peter reminded her quietly as he leaned against the door, silently observing Claire as she attempted to make some peace with what had happened. He was right, sooner or later someone from the front desk or housekeeping would want to know what they were doing there. It was a wonder they hadn't already cleaned out the room.
She gathered a few clothes that littered the floor; they all carried Sylar's smell on them and she could almost imagine he was there if she closed her eyes long enough. She took in a shuddering breath but before Peter could wrap her into a comforting hug, she pushed him off and said. “I'll be okay. I will.”
It was a bold faced lie but she swore by it.
She gathered their clothes, threw them in Sylar's duffel bag and walked back out to the car. Peter followed behind her, at a loss for words but she could tell he cared and wanted to help. He wanted to make things right by his niece, even though he had no idea where to start fixing this problem. She was thankful but life still would never be the same.
By the time they arrived back at Peter's cabin the second time, Claire was exhausted and all she wanted to do was sleep for a hundred years. Maybe by the time she woke up things would be better. Maybe she wouldn't even wake up at all, which in her mind was just as well.
He led her up the stairs to the second floor and into a guest bedroom. He explained back in the car that she would be welcome at his place for as long as she wanted to stay. She dropped the duffel bag on hard wood floor and told herself that this was home now. This was her room, with the view overlooking the lake and the wrought iron bed, antique dresser and cherry wood vanity. She could be happy here.
“Like I said before,” Peter started, a bit embarrassed and unsure of himself. They were family and yet they were so very estranged from each other; it felt strange to even be in the same room as him. In time, she hoped that would change. “Nathan set up a fund for you back when he knew the company would come after him, so if you need anything at all, the money's in the bank waiting for you. It'll help you get back on your feet again.”
She starred out the window, not able to look at her uncle after all the trouble she'd caused him and his family. “I never meant-- I never meant for him to die because of me, Peter. I never wanted that to happen.” It was so hard to talk about the past, especially now that Peter let her back into his life. Claire needed Peter to know this though, to really understand her point of view. “I-- I loved my father and I'm just so tired of everyone dying because of me. I just hurts so much and I don't know how to make it stop.”
Peter crossed the room, gathering her up in his arms and she held onto him for dear life. He was her only anchor in this crazy, mixed up world which made absolutely no sense to her anymore. She almost missed the confines of the company that she'd left only a week ago. Back then life was filled with more physical pain than emotional and she was free to bottle up her emotions. She didn't have to deal with this heartache back when she was so dead inside.
“Oh, Claire.” He finally spoke, breaking through her self-inflicted guilt. “I am so sorry for what I said. It was wrong of me. You had nothing to do with your father's death. It was the company's fault, not yours. God, I never should have.. Nathan only wanted you to be safe. He loved you so much.”
She nuzzled herself deeper into his chest, needing to feel his warmth as she let his words sink into her heart. She couldn't help asking for more reassurance. “Are you sure?”
“Are you kidding? He was crazy about you. He kept talking about how he hoped you would go to college in New York so he could see you more often than he did. He would have given up anything for you.. and when he made the final choice not to turn you into the company, when he fought them to keep you safe for just a little bit longer, I should have realized that he was doing it out of love but after I lost my brother.. things just stopped making sense to me for a long time.”
“Do you love me, Peter?” After what she put him through, Claire didn't know if he could anymore. She was half afraid he'd only been talked into letting her stay through some act of violence on Sylar's part. He didn't really want her around, he wanted a quiet life with a normal family and a whole lot less of her craziness. She was sure of it.
“More than I could understand when I kicked you out of my life yesterday.” He paused, stopping to take a look at her to make sure she was really there in his arms. “It may be the first time in my life that I'm glad Sylar kicked my ass. Someone needed to beat some sense into this old head of mine.”
“So he did kick your butt, didn't he?” She grinned slightly and when Peter wouldn't answer her question she knew what Sylar had done for her. She laughed, despite everything she'd been through in the past twenty-four hours. Sylar had always excelled at solving his problem through the sledgehammer approach.
“Hey, I almost kick his ass right back. If he hadn't been so determined, I would have totally won.” Peter laughed along with her, attempting to hold onto his dignity as was flushed away. He ran his thumb along her chin and then added. “Why don't you get some sleep? You must be tired. I have some calls to make but I'll be downstairs if you need anything.”
She nodded, overwhelmed by the need for rest. After Peter left and shut off the light, she grabbed one of Sylar's shirts from the duffel bag and changed into it. It was large enough to act as a nightgown for her and it kept him close to her, allowing her to snuggle up with him even after he was gone.
Claire climbed into bed and slept from late afternoon all the way through the night and into the early morning. When she fell into dreams that night, they were more peaceful ones but Sylar was still in them. He played the part of her hero, fighting off imaginary demons and keeping the nightmares at bay. That's how she would always see him now, despite their past issues and the deaths committed at his hands. In her dreams, it didn't matter what happened in the past. He was still alive, he wasn't exploding and no one was dying, there was no death or pain, it was like it should have been. A boy in love with a girl with their whole lives ahead of them.
By the time Claire woke up after the first night spent at Peter's cabin, he'd managed to sign her up with a therapist, a good one-- one that believed her stories about companies kidnapping her, superpowers and brain-stealing enemies who turned out to be not so bad after all.
When Peter told her about her first appointment, Claire almost rebelled.. until she realized that it might be good to talk to someone. She'd been through so much over the past couple of years, she sometimes thought she would be swallowed up in the crap that had already consumed so much of her life.
On the car ride over to the doctor's office, that first Monday session, Claire asked. “How did you find a doctor who knows about our abilities anyway?”
“Mohinder.” Peter replied. “Dr. Valsamis is one of his colleagues. They went to school together but they were in separate programs. He said she's a good therapist and knows a bit about Mohinder's work with evolved human genetics, so you won't have to hide anything from her.”
"Mohinder?" She watched him put on his blinker and make a turn down the town's main road. When they came to a red light, she asked, “I thought you decided that you didn't want to speak to anyone from your old life.”
He stopped to take a look at her and she could tell he was seeing her own strength. He seemed proud of her and unsure of himself. “We all have our demons to face down, Claire. Having you back in my life is reminding me of all the things I left behind, all the friends. I was stupid to run away from my problems.” He returned his attention to the road ahead. “My brother never would have left like that.”
She placed a hand on his shoulder, finally accepting the fact that while Peter didn't have all the answers, he did have a desire to find them. That was enough for her to place her trust in him. “You weren't there for his lumberjack beard growing phase, Peter. Trust me, my father had his share of issues too and you're on par with him, as far as I'm concerned.”
“I just want us to be okay again.”
“We will be.”
The cold northern winter melted into spring, which gave way to a warm, dry summer. There was new life all around her, springing forth to give her hope even while she still grieved for all the things she lost. She spent much of her time silently walking along the shore, searching for some meaning to pull her through the pain.
On a whole, Claire was doing much better than she was before. She could swear the therapist possessed the power to heal others. Dr. Valsamis denied this and reminded her that all the progress they made was a result of Claire's own efforts. After some time, Claire learned that it was okay to still hurt over Sylar's death and it was okay to still want to seek revenge on the other branches of the company. Her feelings were valid and she would be okay.
She was dealing, sharing, coping-- the whole shebang.. but there were still times like today when the wind shifted a certain way and shadows grew over the lake, times when she could still recall Sylar's touch and miss him being around so badly it felt like a physical ache.
On one of her travels around the lake, Claire found a small camping resort not far from Peter's house. Parents would bring their young children there to play at the beach and camp under the stars. She would stand and watch them from under the shadow of the pine trees, the unseen observer to their happiness. She eventually stopped going down there because it only brought up envious feelings. Everyone there looked so happy; it didn't seem fair.
Peter was her rock during the hardest of times but even he was difficult to be around. Desperate to repair the rift between them, he tried to do everything to make her happy and alleviate his own guilt. Claire hated to be that much trouble to him. Then there were the things they couldn't share because they were on such different pages about certain topics and certain people that they might as well be in different books.
“Did you sign up for those summer classes today?” Peter asked, placing a hamburger on her plate, fresh from the barbecue he was cooking up. Dinner by the lake, with the sunset going down over the water with the uncle she once thought she lost forever.. it should have been perfect.
She blinked, coming back into the present moment and nodded. “It's only one class.”
“Remind me: which one was that again?” He joined her at the table with a plate of french fries. Early evenings by the lake were gorgeous, complete with the slight breeze and the sound of the waves crashing against the rocky shore. Occasionally, a few sailboats could be seen in the distance. It was her favorite time of day and often brought about a sense of wonderment.
“Some.. economics class.” He seemed interested in her life, which was all she had ever wanted so she lied to him at first. It was better than bringing up sore subjects. Then she caught saw the tiny downturn of his frown; he knew her too well for Claire to lie to him these days. “Okay.. okay, I'm taking a class on horology down at the Portland College of Art. An introduction to the science and art of watchmaking.”
She starred down at her food, feeling stupid and guilty. Claire's therapist told her that she could honor Sylar's memory any way she chose fit but this still felt like a tiny betrayal on her part. She turned away, fearing Peter might show the old hatred he held for Sylar. That was exactly what she didn't need to deal with right now.
He played dumb, avoiding the topic that always sat between them like one giant elephant. “Is there any particular reason why you might be taking a class on that subject? You weren't coerced by some cute boy down at the registration office were you?”
“What?”
“Oh, it's just that that happened to me once. I ended up taking a class on the woman's movement during the Victorian age and..” He trailed off, his attempt at changing the subject failed miserably. Peter nodded, pointing out the obvious. “And you still miss him.”
She pressed her lips together, willing herself not to speak on the subject but she couldn't pretend everything was fine anymore. “I do.. I miss him so much. After everything that happened with Sylar and those two years before that in the company.. I don't even know who I am anymore.”
“Maybe you should reinvent yourself,” he offered, between bites of his french fries. It was what he did years ago, his solution to his own pain. It wasn't such a bad idea, as long as she didn't turn her back on the past completely. “This is your chance, isn't it? A whole new life, in a new state.. going to a new college when the semester starts.”
“I could get a new name. I could be.. Rolex.” She grinned and pointed a french fry at him.
“Well, it's either that or Gucci. And you don't quite strike me as a Gucci.” Peter shot back, eager to keep her in a good mood since Claire could rarely stay happy for very long these days. “But you know, Claire.. he may still be out there. I have a feeling he may surprise you yet.”
“How can you be so sure?”
He shrugged. “Well, I exploded and I'm still alive.”
It was meant to inspire her but Claire wouldn't hold out hope.
Life was moving on and Claire hated the way the seasons changed without her approval or say so. The world had no right to keep on turning, not when the one person who should be watching the seasons change with her wasn't there.
Some days were easier and she was able to go about her daily routine like a normal college student, hiding what happened to her from the rest of the world. Others, like today, were so hard that all she wanted to do was sleep in late, keep to herself and ignore all the to-do's on her list of the day's errands. It wasn't worth doing anything, nothing she could do would bring him back.
She skipped out of school again that afternoon. It was that boy that sat in front of her in class, the one who told her she looked pretty yesterday. He was nice, funny, normal.. but he wasn't Sylar and his advances only made Claire miss the man she'd lost all the more.
Claire looked up from where she sat on the old, wooden swing that hung from one of the trees that dotted the shoreline. Peter walked out from the house and down to where she was sitting, talking to someone on Mohinder's cell phone in his hand. She closed her eyes, remembering her promise to send the cell phone back to the doctor. It was one more thing on her list that she'd been putting off.
“You have a phone call.” He waved the cell phone in front of her, seeming overly excited for some reason. It was an act he put on for her on worst days, like he was a parent motivating their child to eat their supper. “Someone really wants to speak with you.”
It was probably just another stupid call from school or maybe Mohinder asking to get his phone back again. Either way, she really didn't want to be bothered or shaken out of her unhappy mood. “Tell them I'll call them back later.”
“Okay. If that's what you want.” He understood; he was getting better figuring out when to push her forward and when to let her be alone. She returned to starring at one of the sailboats out on the lake hoist anchor while Peter resumed talking on the phone, rather loudly. “Yeah, Claire doesn't want to talk to anyone, Sylar.”
Claire picked her head up, her frown fading slightly.
“Yeah.. I don't know what to tell you, Sylar.. she's just really upset lately. She misses someone.. I don't know who that could be.” Peter spoke again. Claire turned to listen to his end of the conversation. He couldn't have just said what she thought he just said. “Yes, you've already told me that you're busy and you won't be able to get to another phone until the next week, Sylar.. maybe by the time you call back, she'll want to--”
“Give me the phone!” Claire darted up from the swing, jumping after Peter as he began to walk back to the house in a slow, leisurely pace. She was quick on his heels, rushing to reach him before he hung up. “Peter, wait! Gimme the phone. Come on.”
“I thought you didn't want to talk to anyone.” He smirked, teasing her, placing his hand over the mouthpiece of the phone. “I don't want to bother you so, I'll just let Sylar know he'll have to call back later.” She clung to his arm but he was enjoying this game a bit too much to end it so quickly. He paused to speak to the person on the other line. “Yeah, so if you'll just call back when you get another chance..”
“Peter!” She kicked him in the shin, lightly.
“Oh wait, Claire just decided she wants to talk to you.” Peter said before he handed over the cell phone. She took it in her trembling hands, starring down at the phone like it was a foreign object. She didn't know what to say.. this was all taking her by surprise. He patted her on the head, softly. “Go on, Claire. He wants to speak to you.”
She took a deep breath, brought the phone to her ear and stuttered out a hello. “Sy-sylar?”
There was a pause on the line and for a brief instant, Claire thought maybe this was all a cruel trick. Peter wouldn't do something like that though, not now after living together for six months. He finally answered her, a bit apprehensive. “I've missed you, Claire.”
“I.. oh god. Is that really you?” Claire felt herself going numb in shock and made sure to sit down on the front stairs before she fell over. There were tears in her eyes, happy ones this time. She was glad that he wasn't there for once. She didn't want him to see her crying like a baby. “I-- I thought you were dead.”
“Me? Please.” He scoffed. The old familiar cockiness rose in his voice. There was also an inherent tiredness which he seemed intent on to covering up. “The company can't keep me down for long. You should know that by now. How have you been? Peter told me you were.. upset.”
“How have I been?!” She suddenly felt very angry at his nonchalant tone. It was like experiencing the five stages of grief in reverse. “Oh, you know, I've just been great after watching someone I really cared about burst into flames and then disappear for six months to let me presume him dead.”
“..I'm sorry.”
“What?” She furrowed her eyebrows, wondering if this was indeed the same Sylar she once knew. Since when did he ever say sorry.
He sighed. “I'm sorry. I should have called sooner. I didn't know you would miss me that much. I didn't think you would miss me at all.”
“Well, I did. A lot. And if you ever almost die again, I'm going to kill you.” She paused before gathering enough courage to ask for more details. “How did you almost die but not really die anyway?”
“I survived the explosion.” He explained. “Evolution saw fit to make those of us with induced radioactivity immune to our own power.. unfortunately by the time I figured this out a whole building had already fallen on top of me. I spent a week waiting for the Red Cross rescue team to dig me out of there.. a few more in the hospital thinking about how to take down the rest of the company, which is why I'm calling. I wanted to know if you want to help.”
That peeked her attention. Peter may not like her getting involved with a plot to take down the rest of the company, but she owed it to her family to do what she could to destroy the company that took their lives.
“I'm game.” She set her jaw determinedly. “What did you have in mind?”
“I'm not sure yet.. I was thinking about breaking into more of their facilities and exploding again, but well.. it was kind of painful the first time around.” He laughed before turning more serious. “Would it be okay if I came up there so we could talk about this plan.. and other things?”
“When have you ever needed my permission for anything you've ever done?”
“Ah, that's right.” He replied before putting on a show of menacing bravado. “I'll be there in three days, whether you like it or not.”
She laughed again. “I'll see you then.”
“Oh, and Claire?”
“Yes?”
He hesitated, “..I love you.”
By the time she could recover from the shock of Sylar's words, he'd hung up and the phone went dead. She starred at it for a moment, wishing he didn't leave so abruptly but she also knew that these things were hard for him. He wasn't used to loving or being loved.. but she would teach him what it meant. He was, as he'd shown in the past, a quick learner.
Claire left the phone on the steps and walked out to the lake. A breeze blew through the trees, whipping her hair around her face. The company wasn't going to know what hit it. They would all pay and she would finally be able to rest after everything they'd done to her and Sylar.
She was ready.
-THE END-