Thoughts 1.3, 3.2 & 4.3: Include, Don't Exclude

[verasteine]

I watched Torchwood series 1 and 2 out of order. I started on Torchwood series 2, and after enjoying that immensely, I went on to buy series 1 on DVD and watched that. And one night, late, I got to episode 12, and I had an epiphany. Please bear with me. Because this was not the sort of epiphany that I pride myself on, nor one that should come as a

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[phaetonschariot]

Our national soap opera here currently has a character who is asexual. I love it. Gays are getting more screentime, which is fantastic, but you almost never see asexuality acknowledged on tv. He had at one point been in a relationship with quite a sweet girl but was really uncomfortable when she wanted to take it further, and not quite sure why. Eventually he figured out he just had no interest in sex, and they stayed together for a bit but eventually broke up and she got with someone else. (As people in soap operas do.) He's still hanging around on the show, having his friends and his job. I don't know the details of the current storylines anymore, I rarely watch, but I think at one point the ex-girlfriend was being a surrogate for some friends, got pregnant with triplets, the friends decided they couldn't handle it, so Gerald and her were going to raise the kids together. Not sure how that all worked out. But apart from when he was first figuring himself out, there's been very little focusing on him being asexual. He just is. And it's kind of nice, because it's honestly the first time I've seen another asexual person on tv.

[verasteine]

This prompts me to ask you where you live :).

But, you know, this is really cool. I do feel we're getting there, but it's so easy for writers to write something (a gay character, a black character) and reducing that to one sole facet and its consequences. Asexuality is another underrepresented aspect that doesn't need to domineer storylines, and especially in a soap opera it's commendable to the authors, because that must make life hard for the writers!

[phaetonschariot]

New Zealand! Where prostitution and gay marriage are both legal.

Though personally my favourite thing about when they made.... one of them.... I think it was civil unions, legal, there was one MP who voted for it who said that in his religion (some variety of Muslim beliefs) it was considered wrong and a sin, but that's a minority religion here and he believes in separation of church and state so he voted for it anyway. And it's a little bit sad that I still remember him saying that years later and being happy about it, coz it's the whole... congratulating people for being decent to each other, when ideally it should be the norm. But it's a start, at least.

[verasteine]

Ah, the other side of the globe! We have legal gay marriage and legal prostitution, too. I'll raise you legal marihuana, though :).

That's, by the way, one fantastic parliamentarian. That would stick with me, too. We'll change the world, one parliamentarian at the time...

[mcparrot]

Yay, another Kiwi. Is that's what's happening on Shorty St these days? I've barely watched it in years.

And talking of parliamentarians, don't forget Georgette Bayer, the world's first transexual elected to Government anywhere. I think she is great. What a role model.

To continue with Verasteine's arguments, so Vera this is to you too, (thank you so much for bringing this up), don't forget how far we have come.

After the Oscars came out this year my girlfriend and I set out to see all the winning films. We probably wouldn't have gone to see Milk otherwise - it sounded rather dull in the write up. Well it wasn't it was fantastic. For those that don't know the movie showed the life of 70s gay rights activist Harvey Milk who was elected to whatever the local government was called in California. It was an incredibly moving and well made movie that carried us away. It wasn't all about gayness!

What it did though was make us question our own attitudes. The discrimination and bigotry of the time was appalling. We couldn't believe people used to think like that. And then we got thinking, we know how we feel now, that everyone has a right to be the way they are, but if we'd been who we are now (mid 40s, mothers, straight) at that time, how would we have felt? Would we have been the products of our upbringing? Would we have believed all the propoganda?

We couldn't answer that. (Even with the help of a bottle of bubbles).

I write gay porn for heavens sake. But I don't honestly know how I'd react if one of my kids told me he was gay. Maybe I'm not as inclusive as I think.

On a note of inclusive storytelling - Brothers and Sisters has an included in all ways same sex couple, but I don't like the way they treat the gay elderly uncle. The writing there smacks of "we did good with our young couple, so let's throw in more gayness cause the audience likes it." His character doesn't ring true where as the married young guys are great. Their problems are the same of any other newly married couple, money, inlaws, ex boyfriends wanting threesomes (okay maybe not all couples, but it is soapy tv.)

For what it's worth, my "real novel" is all about a polygamous and happy threesome with an amazing blended family. Well they were happy until the bi guy's ex wife ends up dead and he's the chief suspect. And you know what, this story grew out of TW fanfic and the imagining of how Ianto could have something like a "real life". So if this novel ever goes anywhere it will be RTD I have to thank.

Thanks Vera for this post.

[verasteine]

You're welcome.

I haven't been to see Milk, but I intend to when I get a chance. It was generally well-received, as I recall, but so was Brokeback Mountain, and I didn't care for it.

I like your point about being the product of our upbringing. At the same time, I'm a strong believer in self-improvement. I have some of the beliefs my parents instilled me with, but I also differ wildly from them in some others, because I educated myself after they were done educating me. That said, if you wouldn't have access to such education, your outlook would be different.