Writing Emotional Subject Matter -- discuss.

[verasteine]

blue_fjords, I blame you.

Okay, open discussion for anyone who feels like wandering in. I'm working, by request, on a meta on how to write emotional or difficult subject matter.

For the writers among you: how do you deal with emotional subject matter in your stories? Do you think about how to construct the fic, do you think specifically about how the

Comments

[blue_fjords]

Okay, so why I originally suggested this was b/c of your anger management story. I'm not sure if you would refer to it as thus, but that's what I call it in my head. I think we are surrounded by hundreds of bad examples of how to deal w/ anger, my society tends to fetishize violence, and there's no real system in place to teach coping w/ anger. What I liked about your fic was that it took this thing, that we don't usually discuss, and showed how it impacted Ianto in a very believable way and how Jack and Gwen help him learn to cope. So I thought a meta on how to do something like this, in a believable but also non-preachy way would be a good thing, and since you do it well... :)

I don't think I do it all that well, actually. When I write, I tend to have fics that are more "action/adventure/let's eschew the deep thoughts" or "ramble of deep thoughts" and neither the twain shall meet. I also have random violence, though I hope it portrays the fragility of life around Jack more than just violence for the gore value. The only time I consciously made a decision before I started writing that a specific act of violence was going to occur was for the second part of the AU, and the characters aren't done dealing w/ the fallout, if in fact they ever will be. I did check to make sure something like that could happen.

The only things of this nature I tend to avoid are rape and extreme humiliation. I've stopped reading b/c of rape scenes before. I read them in published novels, but don't seek them out. I think it's very difficult to deal w/ the aftermath of rape realistically, and I don't want to read a fumbled attempt at it. As for the extreme humiliation, it makes me physically uncomfortable. Even though I love rm and kalichan's opus, there are a couple parts I don't ever re-read b/c they disturb me too much (and I'm fine w/ the breathplay, so...). Same w/ neifile7; she put a humiliation warning on something and I haven't gathered the courage yet to see how disturbing I would find it, and I adore her writing.

As far as fics making me cry, demotu's story where Ianto is held prisoner by UNIT made me cry. I think she captured very well the mindset of being a prisoner; specifically what that would do to Ianto and for that particular crime. And IHNIIHBT of course had me sobbing like a baby all throughout the final installment. Fics that deal w/ loss do that -- there's one, I don't know who it's by, but I've never been able to re-read it b/c it made me cry too much. It's a Jack/Ianto love scenario where Jack is wandering the cosmos after Ianto's died and at one point he is beaten by these aliens b/c he doesn't have a partner and it just turned me into a mess.

I have missed some questions, I think, but now I'm all teary-eyed and will have to come back.

[verasteine]

I would not have called it the 'anger management story', but that is because for me, it's the 'Ianto as a divorce survivor' story. We each take away from it what's important to us.

And now that I see what you're looking for in the meta, I'll try to focus on that. So, you know, come back and ask more!

[blue_fjords]

I would not have called it the 'anger management story', but that is because for me, it's the 'Ianto as a divorce survivor' story. We each take away from it what's important to us.

That is, indeed, very interesting. B/c he does talk about his parents' divorce in that, but what I immediately connected to was the controlling nature of his anger. My dad has his own issues w/ anger, but he's mellowed as he got older. Most of it was due to getting out of a very high-stressful situation and finding something new he felt he could dedicate his life to.

What is it about the way a fic handles emotional subjects or difficult subjects that makes you go, Yes!, and what makes you go, No!, very loudly?

It's if I can see it playing out before me. This is why MPREG fails a lot for me. It's so often written as a feminized version of Jack is pregnant as opposed to the Jack we all know and love is pregnant. Actually, I've never read a believable Jack is pregnant story. I've seen two believable Ianto is pregnant stories, and that's b/c Ianto was still Ianto, and everyone reacted as I would expect them to (the dsudis story and the amazonqueenkate story). But when Jack starts spouting, "Yan! I don't know if the baby's okay!" and bursts into tears, I tune out. Even pregnant, that's not how Jack would express his fears.

As a writer, I do tend to insert myself to a certain extent, but almost exclusively on lighter issues, or issues that aren't as controversial. For example, I'm a toucher and I think Jack's a toucher. Jack is always touching his team in my fics b/c that's a way I can connect to him. I think most people would agree that Jack is rather hands-on, but I perhaps go a little overboard in that department. Also, I talk to myself and I think Owen does, too. I usually have Owen maintain a snarky inner monologue b/c that's a place we connect. I am much more hesitant to work in some things that I have firsthand experience of that I would label "emotionally difficult," partly b/c I don't know how I would react if someone said, "that's not so." It is so. And I want to be careful that I'm not just forcing my own experiences onto characters who, realistically, would not have them or we haven't seen anything in canon to indicate that they have.

So thanks for opening up this dialogue!

[verasteine]

You're very useful to me, organising my thoughts and everything. I'm definitely getting a sense of where I should be going with this meta :).

[caladria]

*sheepishly raises hand* for me the anger came over much more clearly than the divorce stuff as well, because divorce =/= negative-for-kids, even if it easily can be. (Although I haven't actually read the final version, I don't think?)

[verasteine]

You know, that could very well be because my personal backstory for Ianto included a possible divorce, and so I ended up writing that. But the emotions I used in the fic are all about restraining yourself, and that came from my own emotional experience. So you could very well be right.

Final version is the journal entry before this one. But, you know, not much is changed except that Jack doesn't hit Ianto any more. Thanks for that, btw! Loadsa compliments on that!

[caladria]

Yay! No violence. Well, no physical violence. And: the story you wrote was maybe not the story you thought you were writing? (I never beta-ed it as divorce-fic. I always read it as why-Ianto-Jones-can't-express-emotions-and-resorts-to-snark-or-silence-or-doing)

[verasteine]

No, it was. Thing is, I'd landed on the divorce thing as an answer to 'why he can't express emotion'. So I was definitely writing that fic, just wrapping it up in a divorce fic. Does that still make sense?

[caladria]

Oh, yes - totally! That makes me feel a bit better that I wasn't pushing it in directions you didn't want it to go.

[verasteine]

Sweetheart, I'll tell you what I tell Thad all the time: if you push me places I don't want to go, I'll tell you :). The fic is multi-sided, that's what it is.

And you have a Janto icon. Did you always have a Janto icon? I can't remember...

[caladria]

I know. But, I am liable to insist that I am right regardless of whether I am or not, and you normally do what I suggest. Those two facts together aren't unworrying.

I've had this gorgeous icon since, oh, within a month of To The Last Man airing, I think.

[verasteine]

Yes, but you usually end up being right. Because you're clever like that. So I defer to you because I agree. Like, you know, Jack and punching people. You were right. So I went with violence against property, instead of violence against Ianto :).

'Tis a gorgeous icon. I keep staring at it...

[caladria]

'Tis by aqualillium, and I can honestly say I haven't found a better Jack/Ianto icon out there. I don't normally go for wordless icons but I love it - it looks so simple, but it works so well.