Dad
Today would have been David's 49th birthday. We would have had German Chocolate cake, made from scratch by my Mom.
Mom, Dad & I had brunch at Copenhagen today. He was pretty much silent through out all of lunch, only chiming in, unsolicited, a time or two. Once back at the Lodge, as we were getting out of the car, he chose this time to initiate a discussion about when Mom and I are going to start looking for a new place for him. My Mom was immediately upset and put on edge. I reminded him that he won't be going home, that at best, he could only be placed in a different facility. He accused me of no one caring about him. I admit, I lost it a bit at this point, I said something which was completely uncalled for and terribly harsh. I am feeling guilty for my choice of words. He demanded to know what is wrong with him that requires him to be in a facility? He kept asking us over and over again, refusing to get out of the car. He bitterly complained, once again, that he isn't able to do anything or go out with anyone. My Mom and I both scoffed at this last part. I asked him, repeatedly, as did my Mom, just with whom, exactly, was he going places and doing things? He, of course, had no answer.
The only way I got him to exit the car was to tell him that I would look at other facilities. I insisted that my Mom leave and I would walk him back inside.
He informed that he doesn't really like me anymore.
I check with Rosemary and she assured me that he definitely needs to be where he is. She encouraged me not to be intimidated by his bullying. Honestly? I'm not. I feel pretty confident in my ability to stand up to him. Part of why he is so angry with me, I think, is because he isn't able to scare me and his control over me has slipped.
My Mom leaves on Tuesday on a five day trip. She definitely needs the escape.
Mom, Dad & I had brunch at Copenhagen today. He was pretty much silent through out all of lunch, only chiming in, unsolicited, a time or two. Once back at the Lodge, as we were getting out of the car, he chose this time to initiate a discussion about when Mom and I are going to start looking for a new place for him. My Mom was immediately upset and put on edge. I reminded him that he won't be going home, that at best, he could only be placed in a different facility. He accused me of no one caring about him. I admit, I lost it a bit at this point, I said something which was completely uncalled for and terribly harsh. I am feeling guilty for my choice of words. He demanded to know what is wrong with him that requires him to be in a facility? He kept asking us over and over again, refusing to get out of the car. He bitterly complained, once again, that he isn't able to do anything or go out with anyone. My Mom and I both scoffed at this last part. I asked him, repeatedly, as did my Mom, just with whom, exactly, was he going places and doing things? He, of course, had no answer.
The only way I got him to exit the car was to tell him that I would look at other facilities. I insisted that my Mom leave and I would walk him back inside.
He informed that he doesn't really like me anymore.
I check with Rosemary and she assured me that he definitely needs to be where he is. She encouraged me not to be intimidated by his bullying. Honestly? I'm not. I feel pretty confident in my ability to stand up to him. Part of why he is so angry with me, I think, is because he isn't able to scare me and his control over me has slipped.
My Mom leaves on Tuesday on a five day trip. She definitely needs the escape.