Fractured Fairy Tale-My 2010 Ficathon Entry
C'mon, if you didn't know it was me by the end of the first page, you must have a nail sticking out of your brain like Happy Gilmore.
( Rated NC-17 for a mermaid BJ )
( Rated NC-17 for a mermaid BJ )
Too much fabulous. I can't wait to see the rest of the entries from the ficathon. This piece was so quintessentially V, with the realness, & the sex, & the ridiculous cliches. In other words, so quintessentially V that it is, of course, hilarious & awesome.
I thought my favorite part would be N buried in wench-breasts. Then, K told Z not to throw up on horse. Then, dragon-cat was completely ambivalent. Then, K sexed coma-chick, which dragon-cat watched (I guess dragon masturbation is silent & w/o flames?). Then- do you really want me to go through the whole fic, 'cause I can, but I figure I'll spare you since you know what you wrote!
It's such a great blend of real reactions & scenarios (poor mermaid in her own filth!) into these absurd situations & your inclusion of all these bits & pieces of fairy tales! <3 for the little sewing boy! And for the almost useless goat that they decided to keep anyway because shitting gold is NOT useless! And for Serenity who's as desperate to get it on as Endymion. And for heart-meltingly nice guy J & I-have-to-know-how-many-kids-you-want-before-I-fuck-you-even-though-I'm-normally-buried-wench-breasts-deep N.
I have to admit - I was waiting for the pervert unicorn pet for the princess. Maybe he'll show up when she's a teenager & as horny as her mother once was.
So, the girls get revenge on Serenity for cursing them by making Endymion impotent for a little long while, right? 'Cause the poor guy hasn't suffered enough...
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(I guess dragon masturbation is silent & w/o flames?)
Yeah I should have thrown this in. Next year you can be my Ficathon Technical Adviser!
And for heart-meltingly nice guy J He's such a nice guy. He gets invited to girls' night, he's such a nice guy.
I have to admit - I was waiting for the pervert unicorn pet for the princess. Maybe he'll show up when she's a teenager & as horny as her mother once was.
OH YEAH. Sorry Helios, I'll try to squeeze a perverted unicorn in there next year!
So, the girls get revenge on Serenity for cursing them by making Endymion impotent for a little long while, right? 'Cause the poor guy hasn't suffered enough...
"Stop cursing my junk!" /Endymion
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He's such a nice guy
Do they paint his nails & play with his hair & lament about why they can't find a guy like him right in front of him?
"Stop cursing my junk!" /Endymion
Would cursing be most opportune:
A. Immediately milli-seconds prior pre-penetration
B. Once inside/during penetration
C. Milliseconds prior to ejaculation & sweet, blissful, beautiful release
D. All the time!
E. Trista gets to decide! It's a surprise for everyone!
*cue Jeopardy theme music*
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They totally paint his nails and brush his hair and whine that they will never find a nice guy while his hopes crash and burn.
I think this Endymion question needs a poll. Stay tuned for poll. I'm going to go with A, because I think that would be mutually disappointing and takes into account self-love.
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