(Untitled)

Mar 09, 2007 02:45

To: Jean-Paul
From: Warren
Subject: Words I have trouble saying

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lust_for_life March 9 2007, 09:00:15 UTC
Subject: Re: Words I have trouble saying

I'm not mad at you, you know. I've just kind of been waiting for you to make the first move for weeks. And by "make the first move" I don't mean "pop up to freak out about love and commitment and trust issues".

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:02:49 UTC
Subject: Re: Words I have trouble saying

Honestly? I don't know. I know I'm screwing shit up and I don't know why. I am dead honest about that. I don't know why.

Please don't let me push you away. Please?

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lust_for_life March 9 2007, 09:13:54 UTC
Do you want to know ( ... )

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:22:07 UTC
I am happy with you. I fell in love with you. God, I'm sorry.

If you need to be the way you were, change back. God, don't do this for me and not you.

I didn't mean. I just wanted you healthy. Just wanted you to see happy and...

fuck

i'm sorry

I todl youwhat bothered me like you wanted and when you said you wanted to change i hlped and

fuck

its not you it sme always has been

why do you put yourself through this?

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lust_for_life March 9 2007, 09:26:27 UTC
Why don't you ever just e-mail or call me and say "Hey, how about we hang out tomorrow"?

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:28:28 UTC
You have no phone?

*lame flippant joke here*

Scared of being in the way. With Peter and Piotr and two jobs and your other work and all of that, I don't want to be in the way.

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lust_for_life March 9 2007, 09:30:32 UTC
Ummmm, okay. So you say you feel "cut out" of my life but then you say you never mail or call me because you "don't want to be in the way"? You can't have your cake and eat it too.

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:31:39 UTC
Yeah.

Can Isee you tomorrow, Jean-Paul?

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lust_for_life March 9 2007, 09:33:49 UTC
Yeah. You have my work schedule.

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:36:18 UTC
I've been doing some gigs in Vegas and have a suite at a hotel for the next month.

Wanna come order room service and get massages of the legal kind, after work?

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lust_for_life March 9 2007, 09:38:04 UTC
No happy ending courtesy Paco? :/

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:39:53 UTC
If I can't have sex with you, neither is the massage therapist.

But I'll be relaxed, I'll shamelessly cuddle on you and I plan to kiss you until we're both breathlessly. Nothing more.

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venus_afflicted March 9 2007, 09:24:05 UTC
Im ok

I cna fix this. realy. It can be fixed. i swear.

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