(no subject)
Today I woke up in Chris's arms and knew that finally I was over Chuck. At last. Three months of crying myself to sleep over. You know....I think there's a chance things might work out with us. He has the most beautiful blue eyes that I have ever seen and we laugh at all the same things. His family isn't fucked. He's so very romantic...he even took the ctrain all the way back with me across the city and nobody has done that since Chuck. He says the most amazing things that catch my heart. and the poems he writes omg...omg...omg *swoon*. And he can sing!!!!!!!!! well at that.
And and and he respects the fact that I won't have much time because of school. omg I'm happy...I'm actually happy....but still I look down at the tat on my arm and remember Andrew and the pain he caused me...he let me walk away....when he promised he wouldn't and that hurt more than any heartbreak I had ever experienced did. I look at the heart and remember the pain of all my relationships....and I don't have it in me to believe another boy. They all eventually become notches in my bedpost. 16 notches. I never meant for any of this to happen....ever.....ever.
And and and he respects the fact that I won't have much time because of school. omg I'm happy...I'm actually happy....but still I look down at the tat on my arm and remember Andrew and the pain he caused me...he let me walk away....when he promised he wouldn't and that hurt more than any heartbreak I had ever experienced did. I look at the heart and remember the pain of all my relationships....and I don't have it in me to believe another boy. They all eventually become notches in my bedpost. 16 notches. I never meant for any of this to happen....ever.....ever.