Fic: Sunlight and Song (5/11)
Title: Sunlight and Song
Author: Venefican
Pairing: Nanao/Shunsui
Rating: PG
Summary: More an interlude than a full chapter. Rangiku and Nanao discuss a plan of action, or attack. Whichever, it's probably bad news for Shunsui.
5
'You’re asking me to stay here while everyone leaves.’
‘No, I’m ordering you, Nanao-chan.’
‘Don’t call me that.’
She’s hysterical. She knows that, but she can’t stop her voice from cracking, or her eyes burning with tears she’d never admit don’t belong entirely to anger. He pulls his hand back from where it had been resting on her arm, and she definitely doesn’t lean after it, an automatic habit she had only just gotten used to indulging. She twitches her body back so quickly it almost hurts.
The Captain stands, and looks down at her with his mouth set in a line that curls downwards at the corners. ‘Watch the squad, Nanao.’
She closes her eyes. ‘Yes, sir.’
*
‘You were angry about staying?’
‘Wouldn’t you be?’
Rangiku’s shoulder shifts a little as she nods. ‘Point taken. But Nanao, it didn’t, doesn’t mean he thought you any less capable.’
‘You think I don’t know that?’ Nanao sighs - so much sighing, when did her life become a bad romance novel? - and pinches the bridge of her nose. ‘He knows I’m capable, but he still put me forward to the Captain-Commander to remain. Against my knowledge. Or will.’
‘Well, someone had to remain.’
‘Why me, in particular? Why not Sasakibe-san, or the host of people with indefinitely more experience than I? I did it, and I believe I did it well. The point still remains that I was not the ideal person for the job.’
Nanao watches various protests flicker across her friend’s mind, none apparently worthwhile. Rangiku merely nods again.
‘I was angry when I confronted him. A bad idea, I should have waited, should have calmed down. I blew up, drew up every slight against me from the last decade or so. But...’
‘But?’
‘I said things to him. And I can’t truly apologise because I meant every word that I said, and he knows it. But - I never said I didn’t love him. I never even thought it.’
‘Then why-’
‘Because I needed to be honest with him. I needed to tell him exactly what I thought, so I wouldn’t be misunderstood. But I would never have let him leave if I thought he believed I didn’t love him, because it wasn’t true. I thought he understood that. I thought he knew. Apparently I was mistaken.’ She sighs, hears the wobble in it and knows Rangiku hears it too. ‘I let him go to war thinking I hated him. I’m awful, aren’t I?’
There’s heat behind her eyes, and her hand doesn’t move quickly enough to hide the tears because suddenly Rangiku’s arms and a fair bit of her cleavage are around Nanao.
‘Oh, honey, no. Of course you’re not.’ Rangiku’s voice is a lined cloak, or a room with a just-banked hearth. A warm something you could curl up and fall asleep in. It just makes it easier to cry. Nanao digs her fingers into her friend’s shoulders and tries to choke back the tears and fails miserably. She settles for breathing raggedly, letting Rangiku pet her hair and speak quietly.
‘You’re angry. Of course you’re angry. If my adorable little Captain had pulled that stunt on me I’d set fire to his haori. But all Shunsui wanted was you safe.’
Nanao winces. She knows that. Of course she does - why does nobody see that? ‘I know he did. Does. But it won’t help. If he protects me from everything he’s just preparing me to get killed. Good form-completion skills won’t protect me from a cero.’
‘Not funny, Nanao.’
‘It wasn’t meant to be.’ She counters, and sighs into the red fog of Rangiku’s hair. ‘When I’m dying-’
‘Nanao.’
‘When I’m dying,’ she bulls on, ‘I want to be able to look back on my life and say ‘It was worthwhile’. Not ‘Ise Nanao. She did paperwork. A lot.’’
‘So.’ Rangiku releases her, eyes clear as ice and just as solid. ‘What are you going to do?’
‘I don’t know. Should I even do anything?’
‘Do you love him?’
‘What?’
‘Answer.’
‘Wh-fine, yes.’
‘Well, then.’ Rangiku’s eyes glitter with all the promises of a very determined woman. ‘You’ll just have to issue a reminder, won’t you?’
‘A reminder?’
Rangiku’s grin is more cat-like than it has any right to be, but she can’t help smiling back at her next words. ‘That his lovely Nanao-chan is still his Division Vice-Captain by right and by blade.’
‘And how to do you propose I do that? Pull a Second Division and try and kill him in his sleep? Or an Eleventh and attack him in broad daylight?’
‘Patrol? It’s a good way to prove yourself, and you could do with the training.’ Rangiku says, pointedly looking at Nanao’s sleeve.
‘I haven’t gone to the Living World with the Captain in years. I think he incinerates the orders before I get them. Or passes them onto the other officers.’
‘Tenth and Eighth patrol together all the time. You and me have never had a problem.’
‘He can’t do much about compulsory exercises that don’t involve him. Not that it stops him trying.’
‘Well then,’ Rangiku leans her chin on her hands, smiles ruefully at Nanao ‘You’re just going to have to move quicker than him, aren’t you. To prove yourself. Or remind him, whichever.’
‘How?’
‘Be his lovely sneaky Nanao-chan.’ Rangiku’s smile has entirely too many teeth. ‘And don’t give him any choice.’
Onwards to Chapter 6
Author: Venefican
Pairing: Nanao/Shunsui
Rating: PG
Summary: More an interlude than a full chapter. Rangiku and Nanao discuss a plan of action, or attack. Whichever, it's probably bad news for Shunsui.
5
'You’re asking me to stay here while everyone leaves.’
‘No, I’m ordering you, Nanao-chan.’
‘Don’t call me that.’
She’s hysterical. She knows that, but she can’t stop her voice from cracking, or her eyes burning with tears she’d never admit don’t belong entirely to anger. He pulls his hand back from where it had been resting on her arm, and she definitely doesn’t lean after it, an automatic habit she had only just gotten used to indulging. She twitches her body back so quickly it almost hurts.
The Captain stands, and looks down at her with his mouth set in a line that curls downwards at the corners. ‘Watch the squad, Nanao.’
She closes her eyes. ‘Yes, sir.’
*
‘You were angry about staying?’
‘Wouldn’t you be?’
Rangiku’s shoulder shifts a little as she nods. ‘Point taken. But Nanao, it didn’t, doesn’t mean he thought you any less capable.’
‘You think I don’t know that?’ Nanao sighs - so much sighing, when did her life become a bad romance novel? - and pinches the bridge of her nose. ‘He knows I’m capable, but he still put me forward to the Captain-Commander to remain. Against my knowledge. Or will.’
‘Well, someone had to remain.’
‘Why me, in particular? Why not Sasakibe-san, or the host of people with indefinitely more experience than I? I did it, and I believe I did it well. The point still remains that I was not the ideal person for the job.’
Nanao watches various protests flicker across her friend’s mind, none apparently worthwhile. Rangiku merely nods again.
‘I was angry when I confronted him. A bad idea, I should have waited, should have calmed down. I blew up, drew up every slight against me from the last decade or so. But...’
‘But?’
‘I said things to him. And I can’t truly apologise because I meant every word that I said, and he knows it. But - I never said I didn’t love him. I never even thought it.’
‘Then why-’
‘Because I needed to be honest with him. I needed to tell him exactly what I thought, so I wouldn’t be misunderstood. But I would never have let him leave if I thought he believed I didn’t love him, because it wasn’t true. I thought he understood that. I thought he knew. Apparently I was mistaken.’ She sighs, hears the wobble in it and knows Rangiku hears it too. ‘I let him go to war thinking I hated him. I’m awful, aren’t I?’
There’s heat behind her eyes, and her hand doesn’t move quickly enough to hide the tears because suddenly Rangiku’s arms and a fair bit of her cleavage are around Nanao.
‘Oh, honey, no. Of course you’re not.’ Rangiku’s voice is a lined cloak, or a room with a just-banked hearth. A warm something you could curl up and fall asleep in. It just makes it easier to cry. Nanao digs her fingers into her friend’s shoulders and tries to choke back the tears and fails miserably. She settles for breathing raggedly, letting Rangiku pet her hair and speak quietly.
‘You’re angry. Of course you’re angry. If my adorable little Captain had pulled that stunt on me I’d set fire to his haori. But all Shunsui wanted was you safe.’
Nanao winces. She knows that. Of course she does - why does nobody see that? ‘I know he did. Does. But it won’t help. If he protects me from everything he’s just preparing me to get killed. Good form-completion skills won’t protect me from a cero.’
‘Not funny, Nanao.’
‘It wasn’t meant to be.’ She counters, and sighs into the red fog of Rangiku’s hair. ‘When I’m dying-’
‘Nanao.’
‘When I’m dying,’ she bulls on, ‘I want to be able to look back on my life and say ‘It was worthwhile’. Not ‘Ise Nanao. She did paperwork. A lot.’’
‘So.’ Rangiku releases her, eyes clear as ice and just as solid. ‘What are you going to do?’
‘I don’t know. Should I even do anything?’
‘Do you love him?’
‘What?’
‘Answer.’
‘Wh-fine, yes.’
‘Well, then.’ Rangiku’s eyes glitter with all the promises of a very determined woman. ‘You’ll just have to issue a reminder, won’t you?’
‘A reminder?’
Rangiku’s grin is more cat-like than it has any right to be, but she can’t help smiling back at her next words. ‘That his lovely Nanao-chan is still his Division Vice-Captain by right and by blade.’
‘And how to do you propose I do that? Pull a Second Division and try and kill him in his sleep? Or an Eleventh and attack him in broad daylight?’
‘Patrol? It’s a good way to prove yourself, and you could do with the training.’ Rangiku says, pointedly looking at Nanao’s sleeve.
‘I haven’t gone to the Living World with the Captain in years. I think he incinerates the orders before I get them. Or passes them onto the other officers.’
‘Tenth and Eighth patrol together all the time. You and me have never had a problem.’
‘He can’t do much about compulsory exercises that don’t involve him. Not that it stops him trying.’
‘Well then,’ Rangiku leans her chin on her hands, smiles ruefully at Nanao ‘You’re just going to have to move quicker than him, aren’t you. To prove yourself. Or remind him, whichever.’
‘How?’
‘Be his lovely sneaky Nanao-chan.’ Rangiku’s smile has entirely too many teeth. ‘And don’t give him any choice.’
Onwards to Chapter 6