I tried to ford the river but my fucking oxen died!

[velalezalezalez]

This is me at a Panera in Murfreesboro, TN, frantically trying to figure out how to get the bottle of JD that I bought for a friend and got autographed by the Master Distiller (there can only be one) down to Florida, where said friend is. Did you know that it's illegal to ship alcohol? Even if you wrap it up really pretty! I think I can put it in my checked baggage, but then I'll have to pack it AGAIN when I go down to Florida this Sunday. I am so screwed. The airport is going to take away my nice present. And this is the worst thing I have to worry about right now :) Hahahaha...oh god I need more caffiene. Espresso drip, please. One in each arm.

Top Five Things I Hate About Traveling
5. I never remember to send my postcards, so they get filled out on location, but usually mailed from Enfield, CT (I'm getting better!)
4. I always, always overpack, and end up wanting to wear the same two outfits the whole time, therefore lugging extraneous clothing across the fucking country.
3. The new necessity for little zip-lock baggies for all your personal items. OMGWTF. AND the whole "how do I get my alcohol to where I want it to be" debacle.
2. You can never really return a rental car with a TOTALLY full tank unless there's a gas station literally two feet away from the car turn-in. Damn the man...
1. That I don't get to travel more often :)

Desperate?