if i were a boy

Feb 13, 2009 11:27

:D I'm glad I'm not a boy ( Read more... )

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there is no future. only now. vedhead February 24 2009, 05:58:57 UTC
My motivation to leave the water out of class was to feel the full effect of what focus can do when I'm stretching, pulling, pushing and twisting my whole body without distracting myself with the band-aid's. Part of the mantra is ninety minutes of pain in the room is ninety days of life outside and being without water for ninety minutes is definitely a challenge.

I believe that those were better classes for me because I wouldn't stop to take a drink and have to rush to catch up or burp because I was gassy. I don't wear glasses because they distract; being able to see clearly would take all of my focus off of me. I know myself and I'm pretty sure I'd be looking around the room, telling myself to focus, losing focus of the feeling of being in this moment, etc etc. Even now the thoughts tend to linger during my meditation and when I find myself thinking, "Come back to the moment.... don't lose focus..." I start feeling dizzy or wobbly.

I guess I've learned perception changes when I find I'm not thinking about the past [that I need to let go of, that I cannot change, etc etc etc] and not thinking about the future [which does not exist] and being truly present. On my good days, I rock in that class. In fact, today was a really great class. I hardly drank the water I had in the room [up until the very last pose and the class was over...] because I was so focused on where I was and what I was doing. I didn't get dizzy, didn't sit down, did every single pose even if it wasn't for the entire 30-60 seconds, I DID MY BEST. [OooOo I'm feeling it now.]

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