Reflections on romance

[vdatewaterloo]

I read a story tonight, a romantic story. The ending was less than satisfactory to me, with the main character leaving the woman he loved for no reason readily apparent to me. The ending made me angry, really angry, which marks perhaps the entry into double digits of times in my life in which I have been really angry

Comments

Re: 1/2

[kagiri9]

As for the gamer-girl... No, it's not unreasonable to want to hold out, but you may want to think of it from another angle. You've got non-gaming hobbies (I can name some if you don't believe me) which are more likely to be common interests for the people you meet. However, someone YOU find attractive on an intellectual level is also MORE likely than a random person to be interested in the same intellectual hobbies. So if you start dating a girl who isn't a gamer (or much of one, at least), you can probably indoctrinate her. Of course, you'd also want to do this in a softer-than-Vinay's-usual-methods way. You tend to brick people when you're excited. I would say that waiting for someone who has all your interests isn't wise. Waiting for someone who is willing to examine your interests: that's worth waiting for.

Naive? Well, yes. There are short term relationships. Summer flings, one night stands, Convention hook ups -- even if sex isn't involved, some times you'll incur a short relationship, normally lasting less than months. It happens. I do consider my brief romances to be long term relationships, especially considering that they did both become reclassified as friendships later on. Why should you disenfranchise that? I mean, think about it, Vinay. 8 Months, that is a school year. Are you saying that between First and second year, niether you nor anyone you knew changed significantly? Cause that would make you a damn liar. It happens, people become different, maybe the relationship warps a little too much and you call the whole thing off. Or maybe a bigger change, like major commitments in different places. Long distance relationships SUCK. Sure years is nice to think about, but it's not always plausible.

And screw those standards, my sister is getting married (weird! Creepy!) in less than a month! To her FIRST boyfriend, whom she started dating at the end of highschool, giving them about 5 years, maybe six. And they're quite happy. Just because not all relationships make it doesn't mean they can't or people aren't trying. But it's also unrealistic to expect your first relationship to last the rest of your life. Hell, it's even more likely to end up comming back to an old flame and rekindling it than it is to go totally unbroken with no one inbetween.

I don't think your conceptions of romance are wrong... I just think they're romanticized. (You couldn't pick a favorite movie out of a sea of DVDs with only the cover and the trailer to tell you about them, could you?)

(Oh, and thanks for poking a hole in my box, even if its only a happy side effect.)