something Ashley sent me
Subject: Why Men Are Never Depressed
>WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
>
>
>Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
>creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding
>plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be
>President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a
>water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you
>the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another
>gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to
>stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay.
>Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never
>stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut,
>blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.
>
>Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about
>tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all
>your own jars.. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
>thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be
>your friend.
>
>Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more
>than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are
>unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its
>original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You
>only have to shave your face and neck.
>
>You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes --
>one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs
>look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of
>choice concerning growing a mustache.
>
>You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25
>minutes.
>
>No wonder men are happier.
>
>Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy
>reading it
>WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
>
>
>Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
>creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding
>plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be
>President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a
>water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you
>the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another
>gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to
>stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay.
>Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never
>stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut,
>blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.
>
>Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about
>tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all
>your own jars.. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
>thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be
>your friend.
>
>Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more
>than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are
>unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its
>original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You
>only have to shave your face and neck.
>
>You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes --
>one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs
>look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of
>choice concerning growing a mustache.
>
>You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25
>minutes.
>
>No wonder men are happier.
>
>Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy
>reading it