05: Jingle Hell

[duncansdontsing]

Characters: Duncan and anyone present for his war on Christmas 8|
Location: The plaza.
Time: Noon
Style: Whatever, I'll match you.
Status: Open like a telethon's phone lines

So Duncan had finally given in to the nagging encouragement from the townspeople to hang a stupid stocking. Which is precisely what he's doing now...it's just, uh, the method

Comments

[stayb100ponyboy]

That would stay closed better if you stitched it instead of using tape.

[Focus in on the most important element here, Equius.]

[duncansdontsing]

Do I look like I know my way around a needle and thread? Besides, I sew the stupid thing shut and the stupid dorks who live here might not shut up about me hanging one of the stupid things.

[...alright, fair point. The only real use he has for a needle is piercings. Well, and poking people, but the point is he doesn't know how to sew, Equius.]

They bother you nonstop to hang one of these stupid things too?

[stayb100ponyboy]

[Equius doesn't know how to sew either, really. He can stitch up wounds but not fabric.]

Yes. I just hung one up and then they left me alone.

[Shrug]

I don't see much of a point, honestly.

[duncansdontsing]

It's just some stupid holiday tradition from where I come from. Hang a stocking and Santa gives you candy and toys if you've been nice, or coal if you've been naughty.

[In theory, anyway. And Duncan doesn't look like he really believes it.]

He ain't real where I come from, but I'm guessin' this place has some warped version or another, and that fat loser's gonna have to work his ass off to get anything in that stocking.

[Hey, in his mind? It's Duncan: 1, Santa: 0]

[stayb100ponyboy]

That's silly. A lump of coal is far more useful than candy or toys. I think your human creation has his priorities backwards.

[duncansdontsing]

Don't I know it. Just ask my folks- they had to stop givin' me coal, 'cuz I just used it to start fires.

[Yeah, he was always this sweet :|]

[stayb100ponyboy]

Heh.

[Equius thinks you are probably a bad influence, Duncan, but he doesn't care.]

Maybe you'll get some coal this year, then.

[duncansdontsing]

[Oh, he probably is. But there's some redeeming qualities to be found. Deep down, under a rock or something. It's why he'll be secretly delivering Equius a present this year.]

Tch, only if Santy-Claus breaks the rules. It's gotta go in the stocking.

[He's gonna point up at it, just in case Equius somehow forgot which stocking they were talking about. And because all the cool kids talk with their hands.]

So unless the fat man's got a way around gravity, I'm thinkin' I win here.

[stayb100ponyboy]

Let me help make sure that's the case.

[Equius reaches out and easily manipulates the pole, bending it like it's rubber instead of metal, and wraps it around the stocking.]

There. Now he'll have to work to fill it.

[Definitely a bad influence.]

[duncansdontsing]

[WELL. THAT WAS UNEXPECTED. People certainly can't do that where he comes from...well, outside of comic books, anyway.]

Yeesh, now I'm glad I didn't take a swing at ya when I got here. I don't think even DJ's could do that.

[But he's the best kind of bad influence!]

[stayb100ponyboy]

I wouldn't have hit you even if you had.

[Equius shrugs, completely nonchalant about just bending metal like it's nothing.]

STRONG is kind of a thing I do.