Almost weekend
So yesterday in the afternoon I really didn't feel well about the whole Philip-situation. It felt like I had been walking into another brick wall and I'm fed up with this.
But I went straight from work to play tennis with Enzo. That was so nice. The weather was perfect and the tenniscourt was in the middle of nature, so it was very nice and moodlifting.
Than in the evening I saw a documentary about young people that got into a car-accident and were severely handicapped for the rest of their lives. It was horrible to see. So I realized how futile my worries were and how fortunate I am that I got out of my car-accident without any damage.
How cruel it may sound...I am even thankful that the other guy died and didn't come out of it as a plant. It is horrible to see how they just sit there, waiting for death to come, which might come 50 years later. Seeing them suffering, their friends and family suffering. I would choose for death immediately instead of being a plant.
I dreamed about Srila Gurudeva tonight. It was beautiful and weird. I dreamed I was in a room with Srila Gurudeva and some of my highschool friends. My friends just went to sit next to Srila Gurudeva on this vyasasana. And they motioned to me to also go and sit next to him. I didn't wanna do that, because I can't just sit next to my Gurudeva, on the same heigth. But he was radiating again a very loving signal.
Than at some point Gurudeva was standing up and he was holding my hands while talking to me. After a while he started talking about worldly things and I thought "this can't be my Gurudeva, he would never talk anything besides Harikatha" and when I looked again at his face, I saw it was another sanyasi, in who I have less faith.
Tonight we are having a surprise party for Karen, who is getting married tomorrow. Tomorrow I will go to the pinkparty in Maastricht (which always sucks actually)and on sunday we will go to the You in Brussels.
But I went straight from work to play tennis with Enzo. That was so nice. The weather was perfect and the tenniscourt was in the middle of nature, so it was very nice and moodlifting.
Than in the evening I saw a documentary about young people that got into a car-accident and were severely handicapped for the rest of their lives. It was horrible to see. So I realized how futile my worries were and how fortunate I am that I got out of my car-accident without any damage.
How cruel it may sound...I am even thankful that the other guy died and didn't come out of it as a plant. It is horrible to see how they just sit there, waiting for death to come, which might come 50 years later. Seeing them suffering, their friends and family suffering. I would choose for death immediately instead of being a plant.
I dreamed about Srila Gurudeva tonight. It was beautiful and weird. I dreamed I was in a room with Srila Gurudeva and some of my highschool friends. My friends just went to sit next to Srila Gurudeva on this vyasasana. And they motioned to me to also go and sit next to him. I didn't wanna do that, because I can't just sit next to my Gurudeva, on the same heigth. But he was radiating again a very loving signal.
Than at some point Gurudeva was standing up and he was holding my hands while talking to me. After a while he started talking about worldly things and I thought "this can't be my Gurudeva, he would never talk anything besides Harikatha" and when I looked again at his face, I saw it was another sanyasi, in who I have less faith.
Tonight we are having a surprise party for Karen, who is getting married tomorrow. Tomorrow I will go to the pinkparty in Maastricht (which always sucks actually)and on sunday we will go to the You in Brussels.