IC Application and Interview for planeocracy
Name: -Illegible-
Gender: Female
Age: 15
Home Plane Identification Number: There's an ID number?
Visitor Identification Number: It's in here somewhere....
Reason for requisitioning a Gate Key: I need to get home.
Intended use of the Gate Key: I just said to get back home. What else do I need it for?
Favorite Color: Orange, I guess? What does this have to do with anything?!
Measurements (Female applicants only): None of your business.
Relevant World-Shattering Abilities: ....None.
Relevant Non-World-Shattering Abilities: Being normal? And being able to put up with loud-mouthed idiots without smacking them?
Psychiatric Evaluation Code: I haven't had one yet.
Hobbies: Watching TV, playing video games.
Education Background: First year of high school.
Work Experience: I baby-sat a bit in middle school and pet-sat in grade school.
Favorite Plant and/or Animal: Cherry blossoms and cats.
Interview:
[Note: Anything 'between apostrophes and italicized' is Kyon's inner monologue.]
What brings you to Confuto Ordinatio?:
I was told to come here to give you these papers? Am I even supposed to be here? I'm actually starting to think I might not be in the right place. This is where I'm supposed to go to get home, right?
What family members do you think were most influential into making you who you are today?:
'Did you even listen to me?' Uhhh.... my father, I guess? What does that have to do with getting home?
So how 'bout them Tenbraks eh? Eh? Catch the game? 52-7, I told Janice in Accounting, I said "those Balthims, they're just not up to snuff this year," but no, she said "I'll bet you 20 plat they're gonna take the banner." Take that bet I did, she still insists they'll turn it around though. Ain't that a riot?:
What does that have to do with anything? I want to go home before Haruki winds up causing even more trouble.
'Like deciding to make the Earth flat as a pancake and balanced on a bunch of elephants standing on the back of a turtle swimming through space. I can only imagine what else he'd have happen there if given the chance to do it.'
What inspired you to apply for an Agent Position?:
Wait--I'm applying for what?! I was told this was where I go to get clearance to go back home!
'With how much I got redirected I think I'm in the wrong place.'
What skills do you think you'll bring to this agency?:
'Defintely in the wrong place....'
About what you'd expect of a high school student. Look, why am I even being considered? There's gotta be better qualified people out there than me!
'Even if I've single-handedly saved my universe a few times. Thanks, guys, but my life is complicated enough. Can I go home now? What does this even have to do with Haruki?'
You sound like you'll be a wonderful match, but you know, rules and procedures and all that so I've got a few more questions for you.:
Match? For what?!
'You have a high school student sitting in front of you! This isn't a comic book or a TV show where they're hyper competent or have inexplicably amazing skills or--or anything! Hello~ Earth to Mr. Interviewer! I'm obviously not qualified for this position, why are you even continuing this?!'
Do you have a history of meddling in affairs you shouldn't be meddling in?:
'More like people dragging me into affairs I have no business nor desire to being a part of!'
Sort of?
Do you consider yourself a hero of justice?:
NO. 'DO I LOOK LIKE I'M WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND TOSSING A TIARA AT PEOPLE?!'
Have you ever wanted to work for something bigger than yourself?:
....When I was younger, yeah. 'Now I'm up to my eyeballs in stuff bigger than me because someone doesn't know he is more than he seems and keeps looking for strange things where there isn't any instead of seeing what is there. Ugh. Why did I even talk to him?!'
Looks like I was right. You're a great fit here, glad to have you on board!:
[She sighs.] Fine. Where do I go from here? 'I can already tell this is going to be loads of "fun." Wasn't my life crazy enough to begin with?'
Gender: Female
Age: 15
Home Plane Identification Number: There's an ID number?
Visitor Identification Number: It's in here somewhere....
Reason for requisitioning a Gate Key: I need to get home.
Intended use of the Gate Key: I just said to get back home. What else do I need it for?
Favorite Color: Orange, I guess? What does this have to do with anything?!
Measurements (Female applicants only): None of your business.
Relevant World-Shattering Abilities: ....None.
Relevant Non-World-Shattering Abilities: Being normal? And being able to put up with loud-mouthed idiots without smacking them?
Psychiatric Evaluation Code: I haven't had one yet.
Hobbies: Watching TV, playing video games.
Education Background: First year of high school.
Work Experience: I baby-sat a bit in middle school and pet-sat in grade school.
Favorite Plant and/or Animal: Cherry blossoms and cats.
Interview:
[Note: Anything 'between apostrophes and italicized' is Kyon's inner monologue.]
What brings you to Confuto Ordinatio?:
I was told to come here to give you these papers? Am I even supposed to be here? I'm actually starting to think I might not be in the right place. This is where I'm supposed to go to get home, right?
What family members do you think were most influential into making you who you are today?:
'Did you even listen to me?' Uhhh.... my father, I guess? What does that have to do with getting home?
So how 'bout them Tenbraks eh? Eh? Catch the game? 52-7, I told Janice in Accounting, I said "those Balthims, they're just not up to snuff this year," but no, she said "I'll bet you 20 plat they're gonna take the banner." Take that bet I did, she still insists they'll turn it around though. Ain't that a riot?:
What does that have to do with anything? I want to go home before Haruki winds up causing even more trouble.
'Like deciding to make the Earth flat as a pancake and balanced on a bunch of elephants standing on the back of a turtle swimming through space. I can only imagine what else he'd have happen there if given the chance to do it.'
What inspired you to apply for an Agent Position?:
Wait--I'm applying for what?! I was told this was where I go to get clearance to go back home!
'With how much I got redirected I think I'm in the wrong place.'
What skills do you think you'll bring to this agency?:
'Defintely in the wrong place....'
About what you'd expect of a high school student. Look, why am I even being considered? There's gotta be better qualified people out there than me!
'Even if I've single-handedly saved my universe a few times. Thanks, guys, but my life is complicated enough. Can I go home now? What does this even have to do with Haruki?'
You sound like you'll be a wonderful match, but you know, rules and procedures and all that so I've got a few more questions for you.:
Match? For what?!
'You have a high school student sitting in front of you! This isn't a comic book or a TV show where they're hyper competent or have inexplicably amazing skills or--or anything! Hello~ Earth to Mr. Interviewer! I'm obviously not qualified for this position, why are you even continuing this?!'
Do you have a history of meddling in affairs you shouldn't be meddling in?:
'More like people dragging me into affairs I have no business nor desire to being a part of!'
Sort of?
Do you consider yourself a hero of justice?:
NO. 'DO I LOOK LIKE I'M WEARING A SHORT SKIRT AND TOSSING A TIARA AT PEOPLE?!'
Have you ever wanted to work for something bigger than yourself?:
....When I was younger, yeah. 'Now I'm up to my eyeballs in stuff bigger than me because someone doesn't know he is more than he seems and keeps looking for strange things where there isn't any instead of seeing what is there. Ugh. Why did I even talk to him?!'
Looks like I was right. You're a great fit here, glad to have you on board!:
[She sighs.] Fine. Where do I go from here? 'I can already tell this is going to be loads of "fun." Wasn't my life crazy enough to begin with?'