TM Prompt #224
TM Prompt #224: Mad
The last time I was truly angry, my frustration was directed at the Jedi. And, if I'm to be truthful, I should admit it wasn't fair to be angry at them. It had to do with Anakin, of course, and some occasion at which he wasn't able to be present. It might have been my birthday, I'm not exactly sure. But we'd planned something special, we were going to eat supper at some restaurant and then come back to my apartment. He'd even hinted he had some special gift for me. I wasn't most upset about the lack of gifts or the fact that we couldn't go out as we'd planned. What angered me most was that, once again, I couldn't spend time with my husband like other wives across the galaxy do every night. I couldn't curl up with him in bed and talk to him about my day and hear all about his. Once again he was being made to spend the night at the Temple, running some stupid busywork errand, and we had to sacrifice our relationship for the greater good.
I know I must sound so selfish, and even now, I'm berating myself for thinking this way. After all, we knew precisely what we were getting into when we agreed to this marriage. We knew we'd be apart more often than together, and that we would have to adapt to each other's respective schedules and never count on being able to see each other nearly as often as we'd like. We knew all of this going in and I promised myself when he proposed that I would never put myself above the good of the galaxy. But promising that on a whim is different from keeping that promise on a long-term basis.
I just worry for the future, that's all. What will happen after the war ends? Will Anakin be more free than before? What if we have children? I fear particularly for that sort of situation. I know I can handle the long absences myself, but could I handle my child having to go through them? We'd have to. That's what I tell myself. We have no choice. That is the reality of our situation.
But I'm a human being, and to deny that I get angry at the situation sometimes would be to deny the facts. I love Anakin. That's why I become emotional.
Padmé Amidala
Star Wars
400 words
The last time I was truly angry, my frustration was directed at the Jedi. And, if I'm to be truthful, I should admit it wasn't fair to be angry at them. It had to do with Anakin, of course, and some occasion at which he wasn't able to be present. It might have been my birthday, I'm not exactly sure. But we'd planned something special, we were going to eat supper at some restaurant and then come back to my apartment. He'd even hinted he had some special gift for me. I wasn't most upset about the lack of gifts or the fact that we couldn't go out as we'd planned. What angered me most was that, once again, I couldn't spend time with my husband like other wives across the galaxy do every night. I couldn't curl up with him in bed and talk to him about my day and hear all about his. Once again he was being made to spend the night at the Temple, running some stupid busywork errand, and we had to sacrifice our relationship for the greater good.
I know I must sound so selfish, and even now, I'm berating myself for thinking this way. After all, we knew precisely what we were getting into when we agreed to this marriage. We knew we'd be apart more often than together, and that we would have to adapt to each other's respective schedules and never count on being able to see each other nearly as often as we'd like. We knew all of this going in and I promised myself when he proposed that I would never put myself above the good of the galaxy. But promising that on a whim is different from keeping that promise on a long-term basis.
I just worry for the future, that's all. What will happen after the war ends? Will Anakin be more free than before? What if we have children? I fear particularly for that sort of situation. I know I can handle the long absences myself, but could I handle my child having to go through them? We'd have to. That's what I tell myself. We have no choice. That is the reality of our situation.
But I'm a human being, and to deny that I get angry at the situation sometimes would be to deny the facts. I love Anakin. That's why I become emotional.
Padmé Amidala
Star Wars
400 words